A few months ago I had a strange experience that changed my life. As background, my name's Paul and I'm, well, pretty average - 36 years old, five-feet-eight tall, average build, mid-brown hair which I was wearing then at a typical business length, okay looks with brown eyes, a short snub nose and a square dimpled chin, and average build.
I was feeling so down that Wednesday. My childless marriage was falling apart - no particular reason, my wife was between jobs, we just seemed to get on each other's nerves the whole time, we hadn't had sex in months and in fact I'd recently moved into the tiny spare bedroom. On top of that I'd just finished a disappointing meeting: I'm a solicitor in a group practice and I'd lost an important client. It was early afternoon and I couldn't face going home to yet another row and an evening of angry silences. It's fair to say that my confidence level was pretty much zero.
I was in Shepherd's Bush and I drifted into a Turkish greasy spoon cafΓ©. I ordered a sausage butty and a mug of coffee but I really didn't have much of an appetite and only took one bite. The coffee was made with hot milk so I had to wait for it to cool down a bit before I could drink it. I was staring blindly down at the table, but then I raised my head and my eyes fell on the most striking girl sitting a few tables away. I guessed she was in her early 20s and he had a Goth look - jet black hair worn loose to her shoulders, pale complexion, huge dark eyes emphasised by black make-up, nose a little too long and beaky and pouty lips with black lipstick. Like mine, her chin was dimpled, but rounded, giving her face an oval look. She was wearing a black denim jacket, black retro Souixsie and the Banshees T-shirt and black skinny jeans.
I wasn't sure what it was about her but, compared to the three or four grey men in the cafΓ©, she shone out like a black diamond. I realised I was staring, and then she looked up and noticed, and flashed me a little smile. In embarrassment I snapped my eyes back down to my table; but a few seconds later I glanced up again and her eyes were still on me - she grinned at me peeking at her. By now I felt as if my face was burning so I stared fixedly into space and sipped the coffee but it was still too damned hot. I was just making up my mind to leave it and get out of there when I became aware of being overshadowed and a voice said softly, "Hi, I'm Lindsay, Mind if I join you?"
It was only when he spoke, in a light tenor London voice that I realised that Lindsay was actually a bloke, albeit a strikingly pretty one. Before I could respond he slipped onto the bench seat beside me and added, "After all, we seem to be two lonely people with nothing better to do than sit here."
Having previously appeared to be checking out this girl as I had thought, I felt too embarrassed to leave immediately and, as people do, we started small talk. Lindsay told me he was an art student and asked about me. I didn't notice at first, but he gradually angled his body towards me, his knee pressing against mine under the table and his arm casually slid along the back of the wooden booth we were in. I only realised this when his other hand came to rest on my mid-thigh.