From Out Of Nowhere Ch 02

Perhaps twenty minutes had passed since Ryan and Jess' explosive encounter. Ryan sat on the living room sofa, stiffly, still recovering from the damage done bringing the damn thing into the house as well as a mild case of blueballs. His face was pale, partly from the effort it had taken to swap from a towel to gym shorts, but mostly from the events he watched unfold in Jess' room...events he had put in motion even as he found them utterly impossible to truly happen.

Jess soon joined him from the bathroom, freshened up as best as he could do with depleted hot water. He wore a large flannel shirt and baggy jeans held at his hips with shoelace between two belt loops: yard sale clothes. Whether the faint smell of spent orgasm was still on him or only wafting out from the soiled bed in his room, Ryan wasn't sure.

"So that was..." Ryan began.

"Yeah," Jess nodded, refusing to look at him.

"I shouldn't have been there."

"Y-you were walking to get some clothes," Jess said. "It's just, you, I was, I couldn't...I don't know why..."

"You don't have to explain," Ryan assured him. "You have a right to privacy and I fucked that up. That's on me. I am sorry."

Jess showed no sign of acknowledgement, only continued avoiding Ryan's gaze, one hand almost obsessively fidgeting at the other elbow with his shoulders slouched inward and both feet repeatedly shifting their weight about.

"S-so how long do I have?" he asked.

"Huh?"

"I c-could just come back for my stuff later if you want, w-while you're in town or whatever..."

Ryan caught on. "No no no, you don't have to leave, dude."

Jess quickly shook his head, his eyes still distant. "I c-can get a hotel room for a while, or...or m-maybe, maybe go back-"

"Dude," Ryan interrupted, forcing himself to bear the pain and stand. "It's okay. You can stay here."

Jess' brow furrowed, as if solving a difficult riddle. "But you don't, I mean I just thought..."

Ryan stepped closer. "You thought...what?"

"I'm just being stupid," Jess told him. "It shouldn't even matter because I'm not, I never had..."

Given what he was just caught pleasuring himself to, it was pretty easy for Ryan to infer what Jess meant. And of course he sympathized, what with going from constant woman-chaser to fantasizing about orally penetrating a man in the fucking blink of an eye. On top of that, he was also likely a significant part of Jess discovering that video in the first place; were it not for his stupid-ass plan...or meeting Ryan in general, the kid may have lived a completely normal life devoid of sexual deviancy.

The strange thing Ryan couldn't figure out was, yes most of the time he ended his trysts with an illusion of romantic goodbyes, most of the time he had managed to untangle himself from two or three women without drama, but there were more than a few moments when shit hit the fan and he'd stood there, whichever girl crying her eyes out upon discovering his slutty ways, only concerned with his sexual fulfillment and how best to extract himself from the scene. He had done far worse damage, had probably driven some women to lesbianism to escape the shit that was masculinity. But after all that absolutely unnecessary trauma he still couldn't really feel regret over, he found himself not only understanding the kind of bewildering hell his roommate must be going through, but panicking in his desire to set the nearly tearful Jess at ease. Unfortunately, the only thing he could think to do was likely to leave him pissed rather than panicked...

"What did you think happened?" he asked softly.

"I...oh it was dumb, but...but I thought, I thought you...touched me," Jess finished in a whisper. "B-but I already knew you liked girls, when we met that crazy chick at the chicken place, so I don't know why-"

"I did."

"-and then I just, something made, wait, what?" Jess snapped, finally turning to Ryan.

"On the sofa," he admitted. "When you stood, I couldn't stop myself."

Even though it hurt like a son of a bitch, it was Ryan's turn to lower his head, his cheeks burning like they hadn't done since childhood embarrassments.

"So you really..." he heard Jess mumble, too ashamed to look the troubled teen in the eye. "A-and the looks before that? I wasn't just, like, imagining it?"

Ryan slowly shook his head, before grudgingly adding "I also saw...you, when you needed a towel. The, um, the mirror..."

Jess made no comment, but his shifting feet and fidgeting came to a dead stop.

"And," Ryan continued, a sour ache forming in the pit of his stomach, "I think Thursday, I heard you...listened to you...at your, um, computer..."

"I feel like-" Jess began, and rose his fist to his mouth. With one brief, miserable glance towards the kid's ghostly color and betrayed eyes, there was no need for him to finish the sentence. He was clearly sick to his stomach. Due to Ryan's actions.

"I don't know what came over me," Ryan said, which was the truth but also not especially comforting to a person whose privacy had been repeatedly violated.

"And when you asked for help in the shower..." Jess wondered.

"That was completely true, and my back is still fucked," Ryan said, realizing the porn-scenario nature of it all was bound to raise some skepticism. "But...I did touch you, been wanting to touch you almost this whole time. Don't ask me why, I've never even looked at a guy like that before, never had a gay thought in my life, but..."

"Me neither!" Jess gasped. "Like...I grew up looking at swimsuit calendar girls and stuff! I didn't really get to watch porn until I moved out, but it's always, like, girls with guys, a-and in the grocery store I always check out in aisle seven because-"

"Catherine!" Ryan remembered.

"Yeah! She like never buttons her top all the way up and, and when she leans up for the receipt you can see, like, a LOT!"

"Yeah..." Ryan recalled fondly. He had actually seen considerably more of her when they used to have sex in the back of her car all those years ago. But it was nowhere near the right time to reminisce on those days.

"Oh my god," Jess groaned through hands palmed against his face.

"What?"

"I can't believe I...did that, while you were right there," he admitted. "And when I saw you, I...I just had to keep...and that fucking video oh my GOD what is wrong with me?"

"Hey it wasn't that bad," Ryan reasoned...unconvincingly. Jess noticed, growing even more distressed.

"I can still taste it," he muttered, horrorstruck, "and then all that talk fucking HELL I am a p-pervert!"

Jess, his humiliation taking hold, made a sudden bolt for the door. Ryan forced himself to move faster and intercept before he could leave, holding both of Jess' wiry, shivering arms to keep him still. In this closer contact, he could confirm the smell of cum was indeed still on the teenager's body.

"Shhh, it's alright," he said quietly, holding him to his chest. "I told you this was my fault. Here, come sit and calm down."

Eventually, he managed to coax him to the sofa to sit with him, still holding close and softly rubbing his back while his breathing returned to normal. As he sat there soothing Jess, he happened to glance at a small clump of the kid's hair, hardened into a flaky, whitened tip, and had to suppress an ill-timed laugh.

"I want you to stay," he told him, caressing his hair while avoiding that one crusty spot.

"Why?" Jess sniffed. "Because you can't stop staring at me? Because I...I'm turning into a f-freak like you wanted?"

"...Mostly no," Ryan was forced to admit.

"Then why else would you keep me around?"

"Because we get along," he told him. "We were doing good, until I fucked it up. You having to leave because of my problem would be some real bullshit."

Jess' body ceased its panicked shuddering and grew still, though he continued to hide his face. "B-but it's not just you anymore. When I...saw you there, it was, it felt like...it felt even better."

Ryan wasn't sure how to respond, and merely stayed silent. All he could do was remember the first days of his own intense attraction, how he had lost control so easily, so many times, to the smallest unintentional teases. While he couldn't help but feel some small level of gratitude for someone else suffering the same confusion, a new side of him found his last week or so of behavior...disgusting, in hindsight.

Jess had already been going through a difficult time just trying to build his confidence and forge a path of his own. Now he was entangled in some sexual identity nightmare, and the only support he had to wander through it was either an asshole indifferent dad, or the creepy grooming fuck who lured him there in the first place.

"What the hell is happening to me?" Jess asked.

"It's happening to both of us," Ryan answered, "and I don't know."

***

As much as Ryan and in all likelihood Jess may have wanted to maintain some space after their awkward conversation, the facts remained that it was still barely even noon and they were completely out of supplies. Their clean laundry piles were nonexistent, while the dirty laundry piles would take both baskets and a trash bag to load into the car, which Ryan could not do in his current condition. Meanwhile Jess was the only one with money, but their sole fast food option that delivered was closed on Sundays, and he had no license.

So after a very silent, very stilted gathering of clothes and backing away of one person from the grocery list so the other could write their choices, Ryan pulled out of the driveway with Jess in tow. Given how little either one was prepared to talk to the other, he was thankful Jess had at some point washed out the glob of dried seed in his hair, saving him from having to bring it up.

The drive was insufferably quiet. Ryan had no idea what to discuss, granted he was focused more intently than usual on avoiding potholes and babying the car over speedbumps due to his pounding back. Meanwhile Jess perpetually stared out of the passenger window, not once turning his way or making a sound. Despite the rising temperature, he continued to wear the oversized flannel and ill-fitting jeans, though whether that was from lack of options or wanting to dissuade Ryan's perving eye was anyone's guess.

As he pulled up to the front of the laundromat, Jess opened the door and climbed out of the seat before the car came to a stop, to pop the trunk full of laundry.

"Give me your card and I'll get the groceries while you do this," Ryan suggested.

"They'll ID you and you probably can't carry them any-" Jess said, not stopping or glancing his way at all, before the pneumatic door to the laundromat shut him off.

"Well this sucks," Ryan muttered, struggling to escape the seat. Given a choice between witnessing Jess' erotic session to continue on like this or missing it to regain their former friendship...oh who the fuck was he kidding, he was more or less a predator, the only reason he had taken him in to begin with was because his dick was intrigued.

He briefly glanced at the laundromat's air conditioned interior, remembered the rows of uncomfortable plastic chairs waiting inside, the pissed-off kid probably occupying one of those at the moment, and opted to stay standing with his back pressed against the comforting heat of the sun-drenched car. When the door opened several more times so Jess could carry in the other loads along with their detergent, Ryan didn't turn to look, only continued to feel slightly better on the outside and more tortured within.

He knew Jess deserved to a way to continue on with his struggle for independence without, well, depending on the guy corrupting his sexual well-being. He couldn't reasonably expect the kid to find another place, not without a license or proof of income. And even if he rectified that with a shit job, saying goodbye to his chance to paint in the process, he shouldn't have to put up with Ryan leering at him every opportunity in the meantime.

The resolution to their problem struck like a bolt of lightning. For a moment all he could do was blankly stare, double checking the process in his mind, searching for any potential snags. How found none, and even though it meant an indeterminate amount of shit to deal with for him, as he'd finally come to learn after years of slutting around, not everything was about his own pleasure.

He resolved himself to bring it up later that night, but could get the ball rolling right now, he supposed. He pulled out his phone and waited for it to boot up.

"Clothes are going," a slightly winded voice spoke from behind, startling him.

"Alright," Ryan sighed, his eyes closed, the sun's orange glare piercing through the eyelids. In his hand, the phone chirped its greeting as the operating system kicked in, attempting to alert him of all the fun messages he'd received since last using it.

"Hey man," Jess said, walking closer. "I'm sorry I'm, like, ignoring you. I just have no clue how to handle...whatever this is..."

"I'm the one in the wrong," Ryan repeated. "You thought I did you a favor letting you stay with me, but...well, let me show you."

He brought up the instant messages and handed his phone it to the kid. Jess took it, looking hesitant, but turned to block the sun from his eyes and began to read.

Ryan hadn't picked out any one message, didn't even have to scroll around for a particular time. At some point an ex, or two or three, had posted his number, so relatives, church folk, probably some women help groups and who knows who else had barraged his inbox on a daily basis.

"Jeeesus," Jess sighed, thumbing through the hatred.

"I've cheated on every girl I've ever been with since high school," Ryan explained with a weary sigh. "Sometimes with their sister, maybe the best friend, or just a stranger I thought was hot. I didn't do flings, do you understand? I made them think there was a relationship. There was no excitement if it wasn't personal."

"But...why?" Jess asked, handing him the phone.

"I dunno, man, I was a stupid fucking kid," Ryan shrugged. "Still am a stupid fucking kid, really. Point is, when I got...hooked, on you, I stared and touched without a thought about how it'd really affect you. The only thing that even stopped me for a minute was the idea of losing your half of the rent, that's...that's the kind of person I am."

Jess considered this in silence for a moment, before asking "So what changed?"

"I think..." Ryan began, unsure of how to put it in words, "It's like, I know I'm an asshole for cheating, but that's just dating. That's bullshit, but it's how I waved it off. With you...I dunno man, it's like fucking with your preferences was worse somehow, like it's so wrong even I should feel bad about it."

"Ryan, it's...alright," Jess said...unconvincingly.

"No it isn't," Ryan knew. "You shouldn't have to put up with my shit just for a roof over your head, and you know it."

Jess stepped closer and, after a second's hesitation, gently put his hand on Ryan's shoulder. "I appreciate you trying to explain, I do, and we really need to talk this out because...the ride here? That felt awful."

"Agreed," Ryan nodded.

"But can we maybe do that inside?" Jess asked. "It's really hot and I'm dressed like a fucking Canadian out here."

"Shit I'm sorry dude," Ryan laughed, only just now noticing the beads of sweat rolling off the kid's forehead. "Yeah, let's head in."

***

They didn't talk of anything serious while their laundry finished up, but the atmosphere between the two was considerably lighter. While "folding" their larger load (i.e. fancily rolling it into a ball), Jess had lifted Ryan's freshly dried bed sheet, a fascinated twinkle in his eye, and asked "Was this one because of me?"

"Was what-?" Ryan began, then remembered his little session from the day before and blushed at the realization he had left Jess in charge of loading all his soiled garments. The embarrassment was nearly overbearing for a moment, but he had to remind himself it was nothing compared to what he'd put Jess through. "Y-yes...from last night."

Jess put it in the basket without another word, the slightest smirk hiding behind his careless bangs.

After braving the post-church rush at the supermarket and stocking up on their favorite easily cooked meals, the two returned home well supplied for the following week. Again Jess had to handle almost all of the lifting, while Ryan limped inside to fall face-first onto the sofa, resting his back for the first time in hours. Before he could pass out, however, he willed himself to stand again and bring up one last issue.

Jess had just finished stocking the refrigerator when he spotted him standing again, and asked, "Feeling better?"

"I think I might in a second," Ryan hoped, and motioned for him to step closer. Jess obliged, head tilted in curiosity.

"Look," Ryan began, "I get you're kinda...stuck here with me from lack of options. If it'll help, I can..." he gave a deep sigh, "I can move back into the dorms, and transfer this place to your name."

"...What?"

"Yeah, you know," Ryan shrugged. "You can stay settled here, keep my deposit and get a...better, roommate, should be way easier when you already got the apartment...and you can keep the sofa until my back heals sometime next year..."

Jess did not fall for his lame joke, only appeared confused and blindsided by the proposal. "D-did I say too much or something, Ryan? I didn't mean to make you feel guilty or-"

"No it's fine," he insisted, his hand raised. "I mean, I am guilty. It's just, I feel like you should have a way out of this, a choice, you know?"

"A choice..." Jess repeated.

"Tell me what you decide later?" Ryan asked. "I'll ask my professor if I can take a bit to recover, then I can get the paperwork to the dorm office sometime this week. Believe me, this is way easier for me than you having to start all over."

"W-well, alright, if you're sure, I'll definitely have to think about it..." Jess muttered.

Ryan nodded, stretched as far as his limited movement would allow and turned to the hallway. "You can heat up a pizza or whatever. I'm going to freshen up a bit, then lie down and die for a few hours."

***

Nearly an hour later, sprawled across his bed with a pillow beneath his back for support, a pair of boxers and little else, Ryan was seconds away from once again shifting to a different, equally uncomfortable position when a gentle tap at his door caught his attention. He pushed aside a brief surge of irritation and said "It's open."

Jess partially crept through the doorway, found him in bed and, likely noticing his bleary eyes and struggle to lift his head, appeared to immediately regret knocking. Though even before that, Ryan thought there was a bit of blushing in his cheeks.

"Look," he began in his trademark bashful tone, "I didn't want to bother you but, well, I know you're in pain and there's this...thing I thing I used when I did relay races in school and stuff and I thought it could...help..."

Ryan's heart skipped a beat as Jess stepped further inside. Gone were the shabby clothes concealing his bony, bewitching figure. He'd swapped out for a pair of tight black low rise jeans and a clingy tee, a small sliver of white bare tummy visible between the two. In front of him, carried in both hands like precious china, he presented the black massage gun he'd been caught with earlier in the day.

"I, uh, really cleaned it," he insisted, his face reddening for sure and not wanting to make eye contact. "Was going to give this to you before but I got, ah, distracted?" he laughed.

Ryan gulped, willed himself not to grow an erection he had no chance of hiding, and said "Hey thanks, man."

"You could maybe try it before you sleep?" Jess asked with a hopeful upbeat tick in his voice, before Ryan could welcome him to leave. "Trust me, this really helps."