First Real Man

The kissing was nice. Once we were past the initial awkwardness, that is. The kissing was very nice. His mouth tasted of beer and hamburger and onion. The meal we had shared. No doubt he tasted the same things as he kissed me.

The kissing was very nice. And now his hand was rubbing the inner part of my thigh.

It was the porn that got me questioning my sexuality. And straight porn at that. The thing is that between relationships I would relieve sexual tensions by masturbating while watching porn. Like a lot of guys do. I watched all kinds of (straight) porn. Barely legals. Big tits. Tiny tits. Mature women. Fatties. Midgets.

His hand had moved up my inner thigh. Now he was caressing my crotch.

I started to notice something. As I was watching the porn. As I watched the (for example) eighteen year old tiny titted blond with a big ass giving the middle aged man a blow job, I noticed I had stopped imagining that I was the middle aged man with the young girl. I had stopped imagining that it was my cock that she was sucking. Instead, I found myself wondering what it felt like for her to have that big cock in her mouth. Wondering what licking his balls tasted like. (Wondering what I would be doing differently if I was sucking his cock.)

My cock was now straining against my pants. He took his hand from my crotch. Needed both hands as he started unbuttoning my shirt. His lips moved down from mine and nestled into the base of my neck.

Or, as the guy started to fuck the (for example) petite Asian girl with the large knockers, I would find myself imagining what it might feel like to have his cock sliding into me.

My shirt was now completely unbuttoned. He pulled back from me and pulled his t-shirt over his head. Then he put both hands on my face and pulled me to him, my lips meeting with his once again.

And I would get off while fantasizing that it was my ass and not that of the (for example) extremely pregnant black woman that was getting slapped by the guy's balls each time he thrust his cock into her (me). So I began to wonder.

I had one hand on his face as we kissed and my other hand was moving up and down on his upper arm. It no longer seemed strange to me that I was kissing and being kissed by a man. His hands had moved from my face and I could feel him tugging at my belt.

I obtained some gay porn and found that watching two or more guys sucking and fucking each other aroused me just as well as the straight porn had done. I bought and experimented with a dildo and that was very pleasant. And I found a relatively cheap phone sex line that catered to both straight and gay and sampled both. I enjoyed the phone sex with the ladies but discovered that the guys did it better. With cyber sex I got off equally well with either sex although I suspect that the best of my cyber girlfriends were really guys.

He knelt next to the couch and pulled my pants and my boxers to my knees. My cock sprang up before him. I had never felt so big before.

We met through the internet, of course. I found a dating site for gay/bisexual/bi curious men and posted a profile. Got a few inquiries and even a few offers. But before we reached the point of arranging to meet I got cold feet.

Here I was, sitting on his sofa. Pants and boxers around my knees. He kneeling at my feet. My cock so hard that it ached. He ran a fingertip from the base of my cock up. As soon as he touched the cock-head it jumped.

"You look delicious" he said and touched the tip of his tongue to the tip of my cock.

Several times I got cold feet and backed off. But not this last time. I don't know. There was something about him. It wasn't his looks, or not just his looks. Based on the profile pictures he was not the handsomest of the men I had shared e-mails with. (Although his may have been the handsomest cock.) But there was a certain playfulness to the way he had written his profile and in the e-notes and letters he sent me.

He was licking my balls as he gripped my firm cock.

The geography was right too. Anonymity was important to me at this point. I was, I thought, ready to explore some man to man sensuality. But I wasn't ready for anyone I knew to know what I was doing. He lived a few towns over. Far enough away that no one who knew me was likely to see me going into his house or recognize my car parked at his curb.

He licked my cock. He flicked at my cock-head with the tip of his tongue. My cock-head was in his mouth. And slowly, painfully slowly, the rest of my cock followed.

I parked in front of his house three times, lost my nerve and pulled away. The first time I got three blocks away before I turned and made my way round again. The second time three blocks again. The third time I just went around the block. The fourth time I parked I didn't allow myself to pull away again. I steeled myself and walked up to the door and rang the bell.

He was working his mouth up and down the length of my cock and no girlfriend I had ever had had done it better. I was moaning with pleasure and my hips were bucking.

He invited me in and fixed lunch for me. We didn't say much as we ate. Just weather talk. As we sat across from each other I decided his profile pictures had not done him justice. He really had a very nice face. Maybe it was the way his eyes scrunched up when he smiled.

And now I was coming. Coming, coming, coming. I felt it from the tip of my toes up to my eyes which could no longer focus. He let most of my cum fall onto his chest and then he cleaned my cock with his tongue.

After lunch we went into the living room. I took off my shoes and socks. He was already barefoot. He turned on some soft music. We sat together on the couch. We listened to the music. We talked about some of the things we had written in our e-mails. Then he put one hand behind my head and leaned in and kissed me.

I looked down at the man licking my cock and with ragged breath managed to say "Please, before I lose my nerve, I want to feel you inside me, now."

"Let's go to the bedroom." he answered " I've got some lube there."