The following is a true story. I am a happily married 35 year old white guy with kids. I just moved to Tennessee from Atlanta where I lived for thirty years. I never thought I would leave Atlanta but opportunity knocked and I had to answer. I am 6' 2" and weigh 228 pounds. I have short brown hair and big brown eyes. I have always been told that I could have practically anything I ever want with my eyes. While I have always been attracted to women, I have always had a strong desire to be with another man. This desire began when I was about 18 years old. I would go into chat rooms and begin talking to guys to see if I could find someone to hook up with. Because of a fear that I was unable to overcome, I would always end up jerking off and then getting off the computer. I was always too scared to actually go through with meeting someone. Then, one day for whatever reason, I decided to meet someone.
He was a guy that I had been talking to for a little over a week and we talked on the computer about my interests and also about my hesitations. I told him how I wanted to try things, but that I was very nervous to go through with my actions. He insisted that he would move as slow as needed to make sure that I was completely comfortable in the surrounding. Early one afternoon he and I talked on the computer for a few minutes and he gave me the address to his house. The ride to his house was about 20 minutes but it seemed to take forever to get there. As I pulled into his driveway I was extremely nervous but kept telling myself that he was going to make sure that I was comfortable with everything. Upon my arrival, he met me at the door in a white robe and invited me in. He looked to be just as advertised; 40ish with salt and pepper hair, hazel eyes and in decent shape. He appeared to be a businessman and his home was very clean. We walked me into the family room and invited me to sit on the couch. As we sat down, he moved the robe open just enough to where the head of his cock could be seen resting against his leg. Before I knew what happened, he grabbed my hand and put it on his thigh and moved his robe open little more. For whatever reason, I got scared and ran away.
I regretted that decision for about fifteen years. I completely stopped going into the chat rooms and simply read stories online and got off watching gay porn on the internet. Anytime I traveled alone or if my wife happened to go out of town, I would go to an adult store to purchase anal toys. I sometimes would purchase clothing as well. I would get home and try on the new clothing and then fuck myself with my new toys. As much as I enjoyed the feeling of having my ass breached by a hard fake cock, I knew that in the back of my mind, that was not what I wanted. I wanted to see what it was like to be with another man. I knew what it was that I wanted as well. I wanted to be with someone older than I was; someone that was going to be dominant with me yet not aggressive. I wanted someone that would not be in a hurry to just fuck my brains out, but was willing to take the time I would need. I also had fantasies of being the girl in a relationship; which is a complete role reversal for me. In everything about my life, I am completely dominant. But in my fantasy, I want to worship a man's cock. I want him to feed it to me like I am his to do with as he wishes.
After spending time surfing the internet one night, I read a story that referenced Craig's List. I was not sure what this was and decided to check it out. I saw postings on there that I only dreamed of. How could this be true, and if it is, no way it could be legal. I checked it out for several weeks. I even responded to a couple of the posts. I quickly found out that many of the guys on there were either fake or down right nasty. Either way, I didn't want anything to do with them. I also figured out that the best way to get someone to look at your ad was to include some sort of image to it.
Finally, one day I decided I was going to put a post on the website. I knew what I was looking for and put it in the ad. I wanted someone that was between 35 – 50 years old. I did not care about size because I clearly was not looking for someone to have a relationship with; I was not leaving my family I just had an itch that I needed to scratch. I wanted someone that could host and was willing to go slow. I included a silhouette of a guy with a cock on the tip of his tongue. I sent in the ad and then confirmed it on my email. It seemed to take forever for the ad to post on their website but once I was able to view it, it seemed that every guy in the city responded to me. Many of them were not what I was looking for and several others vanished after the 1st email. One of them was willing to take time and discuss things with me. He understood that I had never done this before and was a little nervous. After a few emails, I finally worked up the courage to meet him. I decided that I was going to take a long lunch break and go to his place.
His name was Robbie and I was excited, nervous, and scared all at the same time. My stomach was in knots as I drove to his apartment in the city. He gave me directions and told me that he would be waiting at the gate to the parking deck so I could gain access. I arrived and followed him up a few levels and we parked next to each other. We introduced and I followed him through the maze of hallways to his apartment. Robbie's apartment was very neat and clean. He invited me in and offered a drink. "Coke, Sprite, Sweet Tea?" he asked. I accepted the tea yet don't know how the words came out as my mouth was as dry as a desert. I sat down on the couch while he grabbed two glasses of tea from the kitchen. We made small talk as he sat down next to me. Robbie and I had discussed my previous "failed attempt" in previous conversation and so he did not push anything on me. At the same time we did not have a lot of time as I needed to get back to the office. Sports Center was on TV and so we discussed our mutual interest in sports. I was wearing my typical Golf Shirt and Khaki dress pants so the conversation went towards that. He told me that he was an instructor at the local golf course and told me that he would get me a great deal on lessons if I was interested.