It was a windy Autumn Friday in Manhattan and I had just left class and was on my way to JC Penny's to do some shopping. I was excited and bouncing on my heels as I thought about my upcoming spree when I heard a deep, almost familiar voice call out behind me.
"Jesse! Is that you?"
I turned and saw someone I hadn't seen in years but still recognized immediately. It was Bobby, one of my friends from grade school. I hoped that my expression matched the one on his face which was delighted and surprised.
"Wow! Bobby! It is so good to see you!" I exclaimed as we gave each other a hug.
"What are you up to?"
I asked as we both stepped back from the embrace.
"Well, I just got off work." He replied, "We should get a coffee somewhere and catch up."
Seeing as I was done with classes for the day I agreed, and we walked around the corner to a Starbucks. As we walked we brought each other up to speed on what was going on in our lives. Bobby had graduated college and was working for a small sports magazine covering baseball, that made sense considering he was a great athlete growing up. I, on the other hand, was starting my first year in a small theater school in Manhattan. As we sat down with our coffees Bobby asked,
"So what are you up to tonight? Because I have no plans and it would be great if we could hang out this weekend."
"Well...ummm..."
I stuttered, trying to thing of something to say besides the truth, because the truth was a little embarrassing. The truth is, before I ran into Bobby, I was on my way to JC Penny's to do some shopping. But not the kind shopping he might expect. I wanted to find some new lingerie, a dress or two, and anything else cute I saw in the women's section.
Since I was a teenager I have enjoyed dressing up in girlie outfits. I would even put on make up and shave my legs from time to time. I always did it alone and would take pictures of myself that I would send to hot men I met on the internet. I liked going to this specific JC Penny to do my shopping because the women's section was in the basement where it was usually quiet and I could pick out sexy outfits without feeling embarrassed.
I snapped back to the present. Feeling flustered and unable to come up with a lie, all I managed to squeak out was,
"Well, nothing really."
"Nothing?" Bobby asked raising his eyebrows, "You looked like you were in a hurry when I saw you, where were you heading?"
I became nervous again, wondering if I should just tell him the truth.
I normally wouldn't let any of my friends know this secret but Bobby was different in one very big way. My enjoyment of feeling girly actually began as a child in elementary school when I used to go to Bobby 's house for play dates. Our favorite game to play was house and he was a bossy boy growing up so he would be the one to choose our roles every time. And every time without fail he would choose to the play the role of husband and make me play the role of his wife. I would have complained except for I didn't mind being his wife in these situations. It meant I got to wear one of his moms old dresses, put on her lipstick, and talk in a high pitched girly voice for the whole game.
Apparently I had spaced out thinking about our play dates because Bobby snapped his fingers and joked,
"You still there? What are you thinking about that has you smiling like that?"
I immediately blushed, realizing that I had a dreamy, dumb look on my face from picturing us as husband and wife playing house. I was flustered and without thinking I blurted out the question that I was afraid to ask.
"Do you remember those play dates we used to have in elementary school? And how we used to love playing house?"
I immediately regretted asking it, thinking it was random and would throw Bobby off, but to my surprise he replied,
"Yeah I do, I remember you used to love being the wife and dressing up in my mom's clothes."
I felt embarrassed that he remembered it that way and countered,
"Well I only did that because you told me to!"
He smiled and began to blush a little himself admitting,
"I guess I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy making you dress up and be my wife."
So far the conversation was playing out like a fantasy and I guess that made me feel bold because after a moment I replied,
"Well I have a confession to make."
After saying this I realized it was too late now and there was no going back.
"What is it?" He asked with a curious look on his face.
I released a nervous sigh,
"Well, I did enjoy wearing those dresses and make up. In fact I still enjoy it and I do it from time to time when I'm home alone. So when you asked me where I was heading, I was actually heading to JC Penny's to buy some stuff to put on when I get home tonight."
I looked down at my coffee to hide my red face, I can't believe I had just told him that, I'm such a chattermouth.
To my absolute surprise, however, Bobby remained relaxed and casually replied,
"Well do you want company? I could help you pick out some stuff that would look good on you."
Okay, I thought trying not to freak out, if he still thinks I would look good as a girl then maybe I have a chance.