Ch. 01: Mixed drinks and mixed feelings
Ryan looked around the crowded room, desperately trying to spot a familiar face in the sea of college kids. He hated going to parties where he didn't know anyone- a pet peeve compounded by the fact that it would be like this for a few weeks. After minutes of searching, he saw only a few people he recognized from his classes. Some were nice enough to wave, while others either pretended not to notice or genuinely didn't recognize him. He sighed, wondering why he even bothered to come out tonight.
School had started four weeks ago and he still hadn't managed to find a group of friends he really clicked with. He had dozens of friends back home, all of whom ended up at the nearby University while still trying to convince him that he should join them. But the idea of breaking away and working to be more independent sounded like too good of an opportunity to pass up. So he decided to take a chance on a school where he wouldn't know anybody. Unfortunately for him, it meant many nights like this. He really tried those first couple weeks, even forcing himself to strike up conversations with new people everyday like it was some quota to fill. All of it was in an effort that one of those random elevator conversations would turn into a real friendship- or at least people he could hang out with. After weeks of that, he finally gave up- knowing that it would happen naturally at some point.
Ryan looked down at the drink he'd been nursing for the past twenty minutes- a hardcore mix of liquor that Lawrence, a guy who lived down the hall from him, had whipped up. He was the one who invited him here, after being invited by someone else. Still Ryan agreed, only because he couldn't take another night in his single dorm, texting his friends. Lawrence was chill enough- sparking a conversation when Ryan had his door open one night, but really, the dude seemed like too much of a poser for him to want to get close. He tended to jump between friend groups- almost like he was weighing his options of who he'd rather spend his nights with. Ryan laughed to himself at the fact that even though he didn't want to come with Lawrence, he still managed to lose him in the crowd. Regardless of wanting to come with him in the first place, he was alone at a party with a shitty drink and playing a game of chicken as to when he'd give up and go home.
Ryan looked around again, doing another lap around the crowded living room when he saw a face that made him stop in his tracks. Out past a crowd of drunk freshmen girls was a guy who leaned against the wall, wearing a brightly colored button-up shirt that was more open than it was closed. A pair of khaki shorts and classic Vans completed what Ryan considered to be the typical frat boy attire. He looked back up at the boy's sculpted face and dark features, accentuated only by the string of Christmas lights that hung across every wall of the place.
The freshman daydreamed a little too long, getting caught up in what was underneath the boy's clothes- not that he left much to question. The pink colored shirt hung low on the boy's chest, giving Ryan a peek at the sculpted pecs and two pink nipples. He cursed himself for falling for the stereotype- knowing better than to get his hopes up for another painfully straight and presumably borderline homophobic guy straight out of a cliched college movie. He eventually snapped out of it, only to see the boy looking straight at him- noticing that he'd been staring. Ryan blushed redder than the solo cup he was holding, wishing the cheap lights could conceal the look of embarrassment that swept over him as he took a sip of his drink and tried to act normal. He looked again, too curious to see if maybe the boy hadn't really noticed. But still, the stranger managed to catch him at the right time, matching Ryan's stare with his own. He turned to his friends, mouthing out some excuse to leave the group and started walking his way.
"Are you interested in joining?" The mystery dude asked when he was close enough. He clutched a near empty bottle in hand, backing Ryan into a corner.
"I'm sorry, what?" The boy stammered.
The mystery dude curled his face into a smile, "The Fraternity." He turned his head to the blue flag of Greek alphabets hanging just above the mantle, "This is a rush party after all- most dudes here are either brothers or are looking to pledge."
"Oh." Ryan said, looking back at the boy, oblivious that he'd ended up at a frat party. "No, I just came here with a friend."
The other guy looked around, seeing that Ryan was alone and that his supposed friend was nowhere to be seen. Mystery dude just smiled. "Piece of advice?" The boy asked, finishing his beer and setting it on a table.
"I guess."
The frat boy leaned in, standing dangerously close enough that Ryan could smell the alcohol on his breath.
"Be a little more subtle when you stare at the dudes here." He pulled off a little, giving Ryan a wink. "Most guys are here to check out the fraternity- not the frat boys."
"I-I wasn't-" he tried to muster, but he got caught on his own tongue. He should have played it cool and brushed it off, but somehow the boy made him nervous. It'd been a while since he'd been so flustered- with the muscled boy turning him into an incoherent mess. Ryan was like a deer caught in front of a freight train with nowhere to go. He was sure no amount of dim lighting could hide his embarrassment.
He opened his mouth to mutter an apology but the other boy stopped him. "Take it easy, man. I'm not gonna out you or anything. Ryan didn't even bother to load the "I'm not gay" ammunition that most other guys would have. He let go of that trigger years ago.
The older boy shrugged, "Though I can't say that all of my brothers here would be as cool if they caught you checking them out." Ryan wanted to wipe the cocky grin away from the boy's face. Why did he have to look so good anyway?
"Yeah." Ryan managed. He was desperate at this point to leave the conversation, and this house, for good. "I'll just see myself out." He mumbled as he turned towards the door.
He must have looked pretty ashamed because the other boy softened his voice and turned his head towards the large french doors leading out to the backyard. "Wait."
"Come outside with me."
He said, not even bothering to ask. "It's quieter out there, so we can chat without people overhearing."
Initially, the boy wanted to leave and forget that he'd come here in the first place. "Don't come back to the Pi Kappa house" he reminded himself in big, bold letters. But yet somehow he wanted to see what it was the frat boy wanted.
He softly nodded his head as he was led outside, weaving through the sea of college kids as he headed to the large glass doors. The mystery dude disappeared for a few seconds, dipping into the kitchen, and coming back with two beers in hand.
"You're gonna need this," he insisted as he walked Ryan over to a bench at the edge of the backyard, shrouded in trees and not very well lit.
Ryan looked around, hearing a few conversations from people who'd congregated out there for a smoke. He couldn't make anything out, though, giving him a sense that he could talk freely.
"I'm Levi, by the way." The frat boy said as he undid the cap on the iron edge.
"Ryan" he replied, giving him a weird look.
"Doesn't seem to match, does it?" Levi chuckled, like he'd felt that reaction all his life. He took a swig of his beer, which was like water compared to all the other shit he drank before.
"No" Ryan said, wishing he could hide his face better, "Just not what I expected..."
"From an Asian dude." Levi added, finishing the thought. Ryan cursed himself as the other boy smiled again, "My parents were so obsessed with everything American when they first moved here from Vietnam." He listed off: "Coca Cola, Chevrolet, Tom Cruise..."
"What's more American than blue jeans?" He said, like he'd been repeating that punchline since the day he could talk.
Ryan laughed, feeling a little more at ease the more they talked. "I kinda know what you mean." He shrugged, "My folks are as patriotic as they come."
