Exploration Journal

I had a woman I thought was mine. I had her for so long I thought that thing could change the way we felt about each other.

I am a highly sexual individual and I certainly have a much more developed sexual appetite than your Normal person. As such I took matters in my own hands for years. Take just regular everyday masturbation for example. I since I can remember masturbated everyday. I may come home from a date where I had sex and then masturbate. I would at times rub one out right after having had an orgasm from rubbing one out.

This hunger for sexual pleasure developed into other parts of my body and I explored. I used to insert ice cubes into my anus. I would insert toothbrushes and other things. I used to take handfuls of my own cum and shove them in my mouth or do like a headstand and cum on my own face. I wanted to do these things with my girlfriends and then my wife but while we were dating just getting to have sex was hard enough. Then after we got married, during the newlywed phase when we were supposed to be having lots of sex, we had almost none. Arguments ensued and resentment both ways I am sure. I may not have been very good at sex during this period. I may have made her feel isolated or something and therefore "not in the mood". I am not sure but at any rate the point I'm trying to make is that it wasn't an environment conducive to sexual exploration or openness. So I kept my desires and activities secret.

It was at this point that I began secretly meeting up with guys for nsa blowjobs. I would just show up, get a blow job and leave. It as perfect for relieving sexual frustration.

At some point I started to receive rim jobs and then one day someone wanted to put their finger inside me. It was amazing. I just lay there being finger fucked slowly and getting my asshole licked.

He kept saying how hot my ass was and how he'd love to get inside. He put two fingers in my ass slowly relaxing my tight opening.

I was getting to a new plateau in pleasure I didn't even know was possible.

He starting asking if I would like to be fucked. I just would say no and I wasn't ready or I am not really into that. Then he asked if I just wanted to see what a cock felt like inside me and I relented. I said yes just a little then pull it out. He agreed.

I felt his cock push against me and pop inside with almost no discomfort but incredible sensations immediately washed over me. He began to slowly thrust his rock hard erection into me until I felt his thighs pressed against my ass cheeks. It felt good to be taken like that. I wanted to tell him to pull out but my body wouldn't let me. Over and over he thrust into me with his pace quickening. I didn't know what was happening to me. I was moaning out loud, very loud, and my whole body was tingling. I was begging for him not to stop fucking me when suddenly my cock exploded and because of the position he had me I came all over my own face. I didn't even know that I could cum without touching my cock. It had to be the biggest load I had ever had. It got everywhere. It was in my mouth and on my chest and face. The fucking I was receiving still felt amazing and I was moaning so loud sounds like I had never made before. Suddenly I became aware for the first time he wasn't wearing a condom.

I asked if he was and the answer was no. I didn't really want him to but I asked if he could stop and get one. He acted like he had never heard me. If anything he picked up his pace. I asked again and by know he was slamming his balls against my slippery ass. I started losing control again and wrapped my legs around him and whispered "I want you to cum inside me." He was fucking me deep and hard. I began to beg for him to empty his balls in my ass. I said fuck me, please fuck me, I want to fill your hot load fill my ass. I no more said this when I started having my second orgasm. I didn't cum but the feeling was really intense and that it when it happened I felt his cock thicken when he slammed it all the way in and began to convulse as I felt squirt after squirt of hot jizz begin to fill my ass to the brim and being totally filled with cock, it began to leak out. He suddenly pulled out with a pop and said it was time for me to go. So I left and walked out into a new world.

To be continued...