My name is Levi. I'm 22 years old and I live alone in a tiny apartment. I keep to myself because it's easier.
I've never really been with a guy before and I've definitely never been with a girl. As you can imagine, this has always been a source of frustration for me. Up until a few days ago, I'd been involved with a much older man over the internet. I met him on fetlife a few months back and things have been escalating.
Until he ghosted me - I'm sorry to say that's exactly what happened - we had been Skyping every night for several hours at a time, and communicating via text almost constantly. "Daddy" was the role he played for me and he had all kinds of pet names for me.
Sure his bark was bigger than his bite, but we still had lots of fun. He was everything I never knew I wanted in a partner. He turned me on to imasculation and forced feminization, self bondage, mental conditioning/brainwashing, and mesochism. He had a fascination with chastity in all of its forms that was rubbing off on me heavily. You'll understand more later, but believe me when I say our conversations got pretty dark. And when you're in the heat of the moment, naked on the floor of your pitch black closet ramming a too-big dildo into your ass sobbing "I love you, Daddy" into your phone, you'll do or say pretty much anything your partner wants you to do.
But it didn't last. One day he was just gone. It took me a few days to get the message but I took it hard. Due to a combination of being an introvert and living a relatively sheltered life, I had never really had any sort of romantic attachment to anyone before and I missed him a lot.
I was clicking around the internet trying to distract myself and not doing a very good job when a few choice key words led me to an interesting website. "Ivan's artisan adult products," or was called. They had some pretty interesting stuff in stock. Hand-made glass dildos worth hundreds of dollars, home made massage oils and lubes, custom fitted leather restraints, that kind of thing. None of it was cheap. I clicked around idly just admiring what they had when I came across an item description that I had to read a couple of times to really wrap my head around.
"Eternal oils - 1oz bottle"
"Made from a very rare, expensive oil extracted from the ironwood tree, this single serving of personal lubricant has a permanent and irreversible effect. The user will experience a single, normal orgasm upon reaching his or her climax. Following this, the user will never again be able to achieve an orgasm in his or her life. The user's libido will not be effected. Physical arousal will still take place in both the male and female anatomy, and it will still be possible to 'edge,' but an orgasm will never be experienced again. This product is reserved for most dedicated of submissives, and is the ultimate exercise of chastity."
A single ounce of the stuff cost $400.
This amazed me. I must have read the description a dozen times. I bookmarked the page. Just thinking about it made me so horny I started shivering. You ever get that? That's the best. I stripped down, went into my kitchen, winced and hissed as I laid down on the freezing tile, and jerked myself off. This was a habit I had been trained with by my former Daddy, and I did it without thinking about it.
For the next three days this little bottle of lube was all I could think about. I was masturbating more often than when I was with my Daddy. The third day just happened to be pay day and I pulled the trigger on the stuff without even thinking about it as soon as my deposit hit. Half of me was scoffing at having just spend $400 on an obvious scam, and the other half of me didn't care.
Two days later, there was a tiny brown box in the mail.
The bottle was tiny. After all it only held an ounce of lube. It was plain, matte black with a golden circle as it's only mark.
It sat on my night stand for about a week. I thought about it constantly but for a reason I still can't explain, I had yet to use it
Then, one afternoon on my day off, I was in my tiny bathroom relieving myself idly scrolling through my phone. I saw that I had an email from "admin@ivans.com"
"Hello!
Your recent purchase of one of our more exclusive products is appreciated! Would you be willing to write a brief product review describing you and your partner's experience with the Eternal Oils?"
I smiled to myself. Because I wasn't quite done in the restroom yet and I had a minute, I went ahead and typed out a quick reply.
"Hello,
I actually bought the oil just for myself. I haven't gotten around to using it yet but I'm sure I'll convince myself to try it soon. I'll write back once I do! Is there an form on your website or do you just prefer a follow-up email?"
I closed out my phone and didn't think anything more of it. About 45 minutes later I had just made it to the groceries - the first of my errands for the day - when my phone buzzed. I stood off to the side of the cart corral by the door so I wouldn't be in anyone's way and checked it. The email I had received had a completely different tone.
"I am on my way to the address you had the oils shipped to. I will arrive at roughly 5pm this evening. Your entire body - excluding your head - will be completely smooth shaven and you will be showered. You will trim and paint your fingernails and toe nails and you will answer the door wearing nothing. I will only knock once."
I read the email a few times. I was completely taken aback. Eventually I put the phone down and went about my business but I was walking around the store in a haze. Mostly, I was trying to figure out whether I really believed this person was going to show up at my apartment. And for what exactly?
Whatever. I did my thing at the store and got what I came to get, then went home. Business as usual.
But damned if there want a package of fresh razors and a bottle of white nail polish in my bags.
Somewhere along the line my mind made itself up without telling me. You ever have that happen? You ever try to make a decision then realize it's been decided for you somehow? That's where I was at. I put my groceries away and stepped into the shower.
I had never shaved my entire body before but the idea of what I was doing aroused me. I went through the entire four pack of razors and about half a bottle of shave gel. My legs were a challenge. But I was used to shaving my pubic area. The rest was little stuff. I didn't have much arm hair but I got rid of it. Under my arms, my chest, all that good stuff. That went too.
I suppose I should tell you I'm about 5'7 and your average young white guy. Although I looked a little young for my age. I wasn't slim but not really chubby either. Soft was probably the best way to describe me. But once my skin was bare and my nails were painted? I went full-on twink. I spent quite a bit of time marveling at myself in the mirror and was tempted to touch myself, but something told me to save it for whatever came - or didn't come - at 5 o'clock.
I spent a few minutes tidying up and then spent more time than I thought laying on my couch idly running my hands over my smooth skin. It was new and it felt raw, and it was enough to get me going.
But that arousal completely melted away when I heard the knock.
Now to be fair, I knew I would freeze up. I was counting on it. But I remembered "him" saying he would only knock once. So I had already prepared myself. I had mentally rehearsed going and opening the door without thinking about it, so I didn't have the chance to psych myself out.
That's what I did.
