Hello, my name is Anthony and this is the story of how a tragic accident became my very own miracle.
You see, I am a devotee and wannabe of paralysis. I have no idea how it started or why, just that I am incredibly attracted to paralyzed people and that I would love to be paralyzed.
Anyway, I was born to a couple of very loving, wise and open minded parents with one older brother. I spent the best part of my adolescence figuring out what exactly I liked about paralysis, it's causes and everything related to it. In college I was originally going to be a physical therapist, but realized that it would be pretty much impossible for me to remain professional and keep my attraction a secret, so instead I became a stock exchanger and ended up making quite a bit of money in a relatively short amount of time.
In my early to mid twenties, I started to actively search for a paralyzed partner. It didn't matter to me if it was a guy or a girl, I just wanted to be able to experience first hand an intimate relationship with someone paralyzed. At the beginning I didn't have any luck, because as soon as I was honest about my desires, they would get angry, disgusted or offended.
It wasn't until I met James, that I was finally able to find an open minded and easy going paralyzed partner and with him, finally be able to realize my most intimate desires. James is a paraplegic, completely paralyzed from the mid-chest down, at the T-5 vertebrae. I found him hot, cute and a bit mysterious at first, fell head over heels as I got to know him, and my love was completely cemented when I was able to run my hands though his body for the first time. He has no spasticity at all, which is why his legs have become so thin over the years of paralysis, as well as losing much of his muscle tone from his level of injury and down. He has a little bit of a gut, as he doesn't have control of his abs anymore and I absolutely love the way his legs flop every time he moves, completely limp and soft. Most importantly, I love the softness and puffiness of his feet. They drive me absolutely crazy.
We had been together for almost a year and a half and were working on building a home completely custom made and 100% adaptable and suitable for a wheelchair user. I had plans to start experimenting with pretending and so on.... When the accident happened.
I had to go to a town on the outskirts of the city we lived in and was trying to hurry up in order to make it back home soon, when out of nowhere, in the middle of the highway, a car moved right next to mine, pushing it sideways and making me lose control of it. Everything happened so fast, one second I was driving at 80 miles per hour on a straight line, getting closer to home by the min, and the next I was basically pushed out of the road and then my car was rolling.... and that was it, I lost consciousness at the point, the rest I know because of what others told me.
James and my father were told that the car had to be cut out in order to take me out of the wreckage, that my heart stopped beating a couple times while they were airlifting me to the hospital... that several of my bones were broken as well as my neck and that my spinal cord was partly severed at the C4 - C5 level and swollen... and that I was on a ventilator because I couldn't even breathe on my own, effectively making me a high level quadriplegic.
Waking up from the medicine and sedatives the doctors had me on was slow, it took me almost two weeks after the accident to be fully conscious and aware enough to understand what they were telling me. First there was shock and fear, then, as I processed what I was told, I could feel an increasing wave of excitement all over. Could it be??? Granted, I wasn't too happy about the ventilator in my throat, the risk of dying at any second because of it was a big issue, but the doctor assured me that I would most likely be able to get rid of it in the following weeks now that I was awake. It was the fact that I was paralyzed, unable to feel or move anything below my shoulders that had me feeling excited.
I tried my best to keep my emotions to myself and to the doctors and my family, it looked like I simply accepted my new reality. They prized me for my strength and maturity, saying that it would help me go through my rehabilitation faster. To James, though, he knew how deep and strong my desires were, and he understood immediately what I was thinking. He easily promised to help me with everything, as he had already been through it all when he had been paralyzed.
I knew I loved him already, but after that, it was like my feelings for him multiplied by tenfold and I couldn't be more grateful.
He easily took over pretty much everything that had to do with my care and rehabilitation, as well as helping my parents through their grief process. Because to them, their younger son going from a healthy, independent and successful adult to basically an infant that needed help with absolutely everything was a big blow. My mother found it especially hard to come to terms with it, always crying when near me and not knowing what to do to help. Having James there taking charge of everything and knowing what to do took a big weight out of my parents and brother's shoulders.
But you would ask, how on earth would he be able to do any of your care if he is also in a wheelchair?? Well, obviously in the hospital we pretty much had an army of nurses at our disposal, and the same would be at the rehab center. James was also already setting up to hire a couple of nurses to help while at home, and he could also do some of it thanks to the standing wheelchair he had been using for a while now.
The first time he did something related to my care was changing my Ted socks, my catheter and pee bag. I still can't not describe the feeling I got from watching him "standing" in his wheelchair and manipulating my limp legs and dick with such love and care, with me not being able to feel anything at all... he even went the extra mile kissing my feet and legs as he picked them up...
I still remember what he said to me as he was doing this:
"Now I know what you felt when you did this for me."
He said this while kissing my right foot and then look at my face and said:
"I love you so much. We'll be just fine. I promise"
I wanted desperately to tell him how much I loved him too, but because of the vent I wasn't able to. Instead, I settled for a quick succession of blinks and some tears of happiness.
Part 2
As the weeks flew by, I was able to get rid of the vent and finally breathe on my own again. After that, I was moved to a rehabilitation facility that was actúa pretty close to the place where our house was being built. Now that I was going to be in a wheelchair permanently as well as needing much more care and supplies, James and I made a few changes to the layout and set up of the house before the construction was done.
Our bedroom would have to be much bigger than before, and instead of the stairs lift that we had planned on installing, we decided on an elevator big enough to move furniture inside the house. It was a bit expensive but worth it. A big custom-made hospital bed that will allow us to sleep together while also preventing issues like pressure sores and positioning. A transfer lift that had rails on the ceiling connected pretty much all of the second floor, making it much easier to move me from the bed to the bathroom and even another bedroom if needed without using the wheelchair at all.
He also set up a voice-controlled environment system throughout the house so that I could be as independent as possible. Things such as changing or turning on and off the tv, the music, the lights, the heat and the A.C, opening and closing doors, answering and making calls, and working on the computer were possible to me thanks to that.
He did all that and more as I was at the rehabilitation hospital learning to be as productive and independent as possible with my new frail and paralyzed body. I loved every second of it. I was able to regain movement on my left upper and lower arm, and some movement on my right arm as well as spotty feeling throughout my body. The movement that I regained allowed me to drive my wheelchair using a joystick, but James and I knew that I would rather use head or cheek controls. That's why after I got my custom-made wheelchair at rehab, James made an order for a second wheelchair with supersensible head controls that I would be able to use with the most minimum head movement.
It was the day I was finally released from rehab and entering our brand new home that the fun started. James talked me through the environmental voice control and introduced me to the live-in aid, Maria, that would help me with things that James wasn't able to as well as keeping the house clean. There would also be a part-time aid that would come in during weekends and days Maria asked off for whatever reason. He then show me how to work the elevator and gave me a full tour of the house, even though I was up to date with all the changes and additions, seeing them in real life instead of paper was very satisfying.
Next to the main bedroom was the main bathroom, which was almost half the size of the bedroom. We had an accessible shower with everything necessary for both our routines and needs, as well as a beautiful deep massage tub that would easily fit us both with handles for support. I couldn't wait to try it out. There were 3 additional bedrooms, the one on the other side of the house, farthest from our bedroom, was for Maria, since it had its own bathroom and it gave us privacy when needed. The other two bedrooms were in between as well as another bathroom. As of now, one of the bedrooms was set up as an office for James to work, since I was most likely to work on my computer while in bed, but we were thinking of setting up a proper workstation for me next to James's.
