Diary of a Coc Sucer

I left the video shop exhilarated from the cock sucking experience. And so aroused that it felt like my entire body was a cock about to spurt forth in a huge gushing fountainous explosion of cum. And of course I had the cum available, both my own in copious abundance and that of my recent companion. I went home and enjoyed a torrid love making session with my wife, doing her twice at considerable length and pleasure before the poor soul begged for mercy and departed into an exhausted sleep.

That evening I sat in the living room reliving the video shop episode. Reliving being on my knees with my mouth open and that lovely hard cock inches from my face. I could recall every minute detail of the event. I recalled in vivid detail entering the room, followed by my companion. I recalled the deafening silence of the room, occupied by just the two of us, the external world shut out as if it did not exist. I recalled the first exposure of the cock, with my breath almost being taken away, such was the beauty of the organ and the state of my arousal. I recalled the cock in vivid detail. Almost as if I had a magnifying glass recording of every cell of the surface of the cock. And then I began to consider the act more clinically. And I realized that being on my knees in front of my companion was a central part of the arousal. He standing with his cock exposed and erect, to be serviced by a cock supplicant. And my role, on my knees, the supplicant. Not the traditional meaning of religious supplicant, but something far more profound. A cock worshiper, performing his duty, on his knees, the role well defined.

Some days passed before I could return to the video shop, the vicissitudes of life being such that however the state of one's interest and arousal, there are other roles and duties in life to be performed. To be sure, I spent considerable time in the intervening days thinking about the previous episode and looking forward to the next. And I spent much time thinking about my performance and techniques. Alas, there is no definitive reference book on the techniques for cock sucking. No blowjobs for dummies, as it were. Or Tips and Techniques for the expert cock sucker. One can hardly pause in the midst of the act to ask for a critical review of one's performance to date. And even if it were possible to ask, would the owner of the cock have had the happy experience of having been previously serviced by an expert supplicant.

I have been an avid and long term fan of porn and so I compared my techniques to what I considered memorable blowjobs I had seen in films. The problem is that the context seemed so completely at odds. Porn cock sucking and porn in general, includes shock value, intended or not. Everything is overdone; the noise, the excessive physical activity, the clothing. For example, when is the last time you had sex with someone in bed who was wearing platform shoes? Porn cock sucking, even when the male ejaculates, seems to contain little actual pleasure to either party. And of course most of the time, the male wanks himself off in the final moments. Who would wank their own cock off with a perfectly beautiful and willing mouth right in front of them?

My contemplation of cock sucking was how to prolong the cock sucking episode, thus raising the pleasure to the highest level possible. I want my companion in the act to feel their cock worshipped, to feel their pleasure elevated to the highest peak, to enjoy every moment of the journey. I want my companion to be brought to the state where they feel their entire physical being is in their organ. To feel as though their entire existence is being caressed in the most delicate and adoring way by my lips. The entire point of cock sucking is that the higher the pleasure state reached, the longer and more intense the descent. And before I allow my companion over the edge, I want the pleasure to be so intense, that nothing else in the world exists other than bursting the dam and spewing his heart and soul out of the end of his cock.

Finally the day arrived for my return to the video theater, with time planned and excuses in place. As I would not be missed for several hours, I was free to take my pleasures at leisure, enjoying what opportunities that might be presented. I arrived at the video shop wearing loose slacks of a thin material, and following my usual practice, without the obstruction of underwear. In this case, the better to show off arousal should the need or opportunity present itself, and of course to caress my own cock without the constricted hindrance of tight clothing. I immediately went through the rear door of the shop to the video room section. Of course one's fantasy of the events to follow will always be at odds with the reality. There were one or two men present, far fewer than the number present at my previous visit. No one was in rooms or in doorways of rooms, the presumed method of offer learned from my previous visit. So I participated with the others in studious contemplation of the porn menu available in each of the rooms. And waited. This went on for some time, perhaps half an hour or longer, with the occasional man entering, looking around, and leaving. I considered leaving myself but my free time was limited and if I left, that would be the end of it for this day.

Finally a few more men arrived including two very good looking younger men. They had arrived separately. A bit of milling around commenced after which one of them entered a room, leaving the door open. I prepared to move to the room when the second fellow walked to the doorway, paused briefly, and then entered and closed the door. After a few minutes, I positioned myself against the wall outside of the room. Some minutes passed and I assumed a coupling was occurring within the room. I had fantasies of the act being performed on the other side of the door. And an ardent wish to watch. And of course there was always the rather good chance that the supplicant would be left thoroughly aroused and anxious for a supplicant of his own. But to my surprise, the door opened and the two fellows emerged, neither showing any evidence of distress or wear. In fact, they were arm in arm and seem to be enraptured lovers as they departed together. How very odd to find everlasting love, or at least a few hours of lasting love, in such a place of engineered anonymity.

I decided to enter the room myself, leaving the door open. In a few minutes I was joined by a tentative companion. At first standing just at the doorway, but eventually entering. I closed the door. He asked what I wanted, to which I responded that I wanted him to take his cock out. He hesitated for a few moments, watching as I rubbed my own organ through my thin slacks, my erection apparent even in the dim light. And then he displayed his own organ, filling out quickly as he displayed it, no doubt having fantasized at some length before coming to the shop about the act that he hoped would take place. He possessed a lovely specimen. A bit longer than average and of average girth, with a slight curve to the right. He did not touch it. So I reached across and caressed my fingers on the underside of the shaft. The cock throbbed and jumped at my casual light touch, confirming that he was in a high state of arousal.

I urged my companion to slide his slacks down which he did immediately. Then the two of us stood face to face, both looking down, inches apart, he nude from the waist with his cock erect between us, my fingers applying a teasing caress, stroking the shaft. I could hear his aroused breathing. I wanted to hear his voice. So I whispered, 'what would you like me to do?' A long silence ensued while I continued to teasingly caress the shaft of his cock with my fingertips. I wanted desperately to sink to my knees and engulf his cock shaft in my mouth. But I wanted to hear his voice take part in the prelude. I repeated, 'tell me what you would like me to do with this?' He finally looked up at me and said 'suck me'. I wrapped my fingers around the shaft and squeezed lightly. I could feel him quiver in pleasure. I whispered to him 'on my knees in front of you, sucking on your cock. Is that what you want? More squeezing of his cock in my hand brought a gasp of pleasure from him. 'Say it I whisper to him'. He put a hand on my shoulder and urged me down, saying as he pushed, 'suck on my cock, suck me off in your mouth'.

I knelt before my companion. All of my contemplation of the kneeling supplicant role in cock sucking flooding into my consciousness. I remove my fingers from the organ and contemplated the lovely erect cock. Olive colored in the dim light. Slightly curved to the right. Bobbing gently up and down in his exquisite arousal. I leaned forward and pressed my lips on the head of the cock, aware that his arousal was already high and a careful beginning was required or he would likely squirt before either of us wanted. I opened my mouth and took him as far into my mouth as I could, pressing my lips on the base of the shaft. I let no part of the shaft touch inside my mouth, other than the head of his cock in the back of my mouth. And I held him there, unmoving. I heard him gasp and felt him stiffen initially at the pleasure of the first contact with my mouth. But after a moment he relaxed, gaining control. I began drawing my lips on the base of the shaft, up and down on it, sucking on the shaft but only at the base. My hands were on his bare hips, holding him, the feel of his skin on my hands like warm marble. And there I was, the cock supplicant. On my knees sucking cock. The accustomed roar of silence arrived, blocking out everything but the cock in front of me, time seeming again to stand still. The cock in front of me the center of my universe.

My oral efforts to get control of his arousal having been a success, I commenced to apply my other well contemplated cock sucking techniques. My lips caressed the shaft, slowly up and down on it, teasing the skin with my soft warm lips. He tasted delicious. The smell of his arousal and maleness was intoxicating. The curve of his erection provided a different and interesting experience from the previous very straight organs. I contemplated other differences. The ridge around the head of his cock was more pronounced. The maleness flavor of him was a bit more acid, but still entirely delicious. As before, the taste of him filled my mouth.

I decided to experiment with some new techniques I had contemplated since my last knee supplicant exercise. I opened my mouth and took him deep, pressing my lips hard on the base of his shaft. And then I drew back the entire length of the organ, drawing off of it to leave it bob in the air for a moment. And then I repeated the exercise, pressing my lips on the base and drawing off the entire length of the shaft. And repeated again and again. I varied the speed and the pressure on the shaft. Gasps of pleasure emanated from my companion. Occasionally I would pause in mid shaft and rub my lips up and down on the shaft, with more or less vigor. Sometimes pressing as hard as I could with my lips on the cock shaft moving very slowly up and down, and at others times a rapid but feathery light caress up and down. When I felt him stiffen markedly, I would release the organ and let it bob in the air for a moment. At other times I would suck on the head of the cock, again with more or less vigor, and again release the organ when he stiffened. My companion and I fell into sympathetic alliance, he enjoying the ecstasy of being brought near the edge again and again, and I sensing his approach to the edge and keeping him from reaching it. Occasionally I would apply my hands to the front of his hips, holding them back as he tried vigorously to thrust his cock forward. All the time very encouraging and heartfelt words emanated from him. 'god yes', 'ohhhh godddd', 'aghh that feels good', repeated over and over in various combinations.

To my amazement and delight, my companion began to participate in the game. I had his organ in my lips and was blissfully doing a slow caress about one quarter down on the shaft. Suddenly he pushed my head vigorously away with a cry of 'not yet', ' oh please not yet'. I knelt in front of him gazing in rapture at the bobbing organ in front of me. Juice slowly oozing from the tip. I waited without protest until he withdrew his hand from my head and then resumed cock sucking on his shaft, again repeating the deep engulfment of the organ with minimum pressure to let him regain control. I slowly worked back up to more intense pressure, eventually sucking vigorously on the head. I felt him stiffen dramatically and thought he was going to explode. But again at what I am certain was the very last millisecond, he pushed me away again with the most soulful and painful cry of 'oh it feels so good please not yet, oh oh oh please not yet'. Again I waited in complete awe as the cock glistened and jerked in spasms in front of me. I think if I had breathed on it, he would have squirted a flood.

My companion was breathing heavily, his fingers on my head holding me there for a long time, the bobbing cock eventually beginning to droop slightly. I pushed forward toward the cock and he withdrew his hand without protest, surrendering to my mouth. I engulfed the cock in my mouth and caressed the shaft very gently with my lips. My companion began immediately groaning and arched his hips up. It was clear to us both that this was the finale. I slid my hands behind him, grasping his naked ass cheeks in my fingers, squeezing the muscles, rigid now from the strain. The full rigidity of the organ in my mouth returned. I determined to maintain a slow cock sucking pace as long as possible so that he could return to the highest level of pleasure before he climaxed in my mouth. In the event, this was only a moment. My lips caressed the hard shaft, just below the head of the cock. The cock began to stiffen in just a few draws of my lips on the shaft. I eased the pressure of my lips on the shaft to prolong the moment. His cries of ecstasy came in short gasps until finally grasping my head in both hands and holding it firmly, his cock rock hard, he flooded my mouth with his semen. An enormous gasp from him followed by pulse after pulse of ejaculate into my mouth, I pressing as hard as I could on the shaft with my lips.

What does one think about when a cock is ejaculating into your mouth? I pressed my lips firmly on the shaft. My companion was racked by spasm after spasm as he completed his climax and entered the resolution phase, the latter I enjoy as much as the former. The cock soaked in my mouth, occasionally moving with a post climax spasm. The semen in my mouth flooded my senses. My hands were on his hips, holding him there in a reassurance that there was no rush and that I did not expect any immediate withdrawal of his cock from my mouth. My lips slowly sliding up and down mid shaft. And so we continued, joined cock and mouth, he slowly coming down from the heights of pleasure, and I enraptured again at the soon to be successful conclusion of my cock supplication, regretting only that it did not go on longer.

Eventually he gently pushed my head away and withdrew from my mouth. I sank back against the wall at my back and watched as he slowly and with evident labor, put himself back together. I swallowed his cum. My companion thanked me, paid complements to my skill, observing that he had never cum so hard in his life. Perhaps it was even true.

I stood and my companion slipped out of the room, caressing me fondly on the arm. I was taking some deep breathes, just leaning back against the wall, contemplating the events of the past minutes, when to my surprise, another man entered the room. Taken aback at the sudden and unexpected arrival of a new companion, and still recovering from the events just described, I said nothing. And before I could say or do anything, the new companion, apparently taking my silence for acceptance, closed the door. The new arrival was older and dressed in a somewhat dapper appearance. He was clean-shaven but for a modest mustache. He asked me if I had cum. I replied that I had not. He then sat down on the bench in the back of the small room, and reached for my zipper.

To say that I was aroused from the events with companion one does not come anywhere near close to the matter. But my intent and interest in the video shop adventure was to suck cock. That is why I came. And yet here I found myself with someone with apparently the same interest and intent. Clearly he hoped to find exactly the same outcome as I had previously contemplated, a cock sucker who did his duty and was then left high and dry, eager for a suck. I would find this conflict again and again in my cock sucking career in the months and years ahead. My interest is to suck cock. I have a vanishingly small interest in another man touching me when I contemplate sex. And yet it is not zero. There are circumstances when my interest is well above zero. He pulled the zipper of my slacks down and, absenting any underwear, my cock slipped out. He very expertly applied a teasing caress to the underside of my erect shaft with his fingers. And of course I was lost.

I looked down at him, an attractive man though a bit overweight. Expensively dressed and groomed. He was staring at my cock quivering in front of him. He clearly knew I must be on the very edge and confined his touches to the most delicate caresses of my cock, but avoiding any touch that might immediately push me over the edge. I was impressed with his coolness and skill. Clearly this was a man of considerable experience and restraint. He reached for my belt buckle and I saved him the effort by unfastening myself. My slacks slid down to my ankles. He then caressed me all over; belly, thighs, buttocks, and legs. His hands were exquisitely warm and soft. Normally I would be repelled at the hands of a male on me. But this was an expert and there was nothing in his approach or technique that under the circumstances I found objectionable. His hands on my skin felt like warm velvet, soft and slow and delicious. And he never ceased the most delicate teasing of my cock, either with his fingertips or rubbing his cheeks and lips against my shaft. I have no doubt that he was enjoying himself immensely. But he took his time and with great skill played my oversexed body like an expert violinist on a Strad.

Of course I was leaking like a sieve, the state of my arousal clearly apparent. And so inevitably he had my juice all over him; on his face, his hands, and on his clothes. I expected his touches to become more demanding or that he would suddenly devour my cock in his mouth. But instead, the cool and restrained approach continued. He continued caressing the tip of my cock with his lips and licking the head, again very restrained. Small caresses and touches whose restraint I found remarkable. Eventually he cupped my balls in his hand and began gently and then more firmly lifting and squeezing. My cock was quivering just in front of his face. He continued contemplating my cock, the briefest caress with his fingertips or lips or tongue, a look up at my face, doubtless to judge my reaction. And more caresses and licks on my cock. Meanwhile the slow rubbing of his hands on my belly, buttocks, and legs continued, a rush of warmth emanating from his skin. I looked down at him and said 'let me cum'. He squeezed my balls in his hand and opened his mouth. Using his hand under my balls, he guided my cock into his mouth. I felt his lips close on the shaft, felt his tongue cradle the underside of my rigid cock, felt an enormous, soaring wave of the most intense pleasure, and I climaxed in his mouth, a soul flushing ejaculation of semen. He never moved, just maintained the same steady pressure of his lips on my shaft and left my cock lying throbbing on the cradling tongue inside his mouth. He kept a steady pressure and slow caress of my balls with his hand, while with his other hand he gripped my bare buttocks, a reassuring message not to withdraw my cock from his mouth.