They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I've always thought of myself as reasonably well-adjusted--a bit slutty, perhaps, but well-adjusted nonetheless--and yet I feel like I've been running in circles doing the same damn thing. I meet a guy, fall in love (lust), and then am somehow shocked when my dad manages to fuck him before I get a chance to.
At a certain point, you just have to wonder if maybe the problem is you.
The easy thing to do would be to throw in the towel, accept my lifelong virginity, and become a celibate gay nun or something. But because I'm an eternal optimist (and I have a few issues with the Catholic church), I still hold out hope that one of these days, I will get to enjoy the sweet, luscious feeling of a dick in my ass.
My hopes of breaking the cycle rose for the first time when my parents informed me that we would not, in fact, be taking our usual summer vacation this year. Instead of spending a week in some hot, sandy beach house in the Outer Banks like we usually do, they'd booked us a week at an all-inclusive resort in Cancun. I personally would have preferred to go on a cruise (I'm a big fan of the show LOST and have always fantasized about capsizing at sea) and I let my protestations be known.
Despite my grumbling, the three of us were packed and on a flight to Mexico by the end of the week. I packed only thong swimsuits just to spite my parents, but truth be told I was actually kind of excited to get out of the house and lounge by the pool. A resort in Cancun didn't sound too bad--and unlike the beach house, there would actually be other people there I could hang out with. Maybe kids my age, or even an older guy with hyperspermia and a penchant for pale twinks.
The resort was even bigger than I imagined. Ridged, pyramid-like buildings sat along a thin strip of land surrounded by pale white sand and ice-blue water on both sides. The beach was dotted with cozy beach chairs underneath enormous beige umbrellas, while the pool sat invitingly only a couple of yards away. It was the most luxurious place I'd ever been, a hell of a lot better than that dank-ass cabin.
As soon as we entered the lobby, a short, chubby man with a bad dye job and a freshly-pressed linen suit swarmed us, all smiles.
"Welcome, welcome!" he said cheerily, his eyes going from me to my mother until they landed on my father, where they remained for the rest of the conversation. "I'm Anthony, pleased to have you here at the Paradisus. Are you the Wyte family?"
"I'm Jud," said my father. He grabbed the man's hand in a firm handshake, dwarfing it with his giant paw.
A shiver ran through Anthony, but he quickly collected himself. "So good to meet you," he said, all smiles. "When we spoke over the phone I didn't know... well, nevermind. Please, come right this way. Our concierge will check you in, make sure you have everything you need."
He pulled out a card from his suit pocket and slid it into my father's palm. "And if you need anything else during your stay, anything at all, please feel free to call or text. That's my personal cell number right there."
My father winked. "Thank you, Anthony."
The man blushed, bowed slightly, then scurried off.
My mom put her hands on her hips and let out a soft sigh of amazement. "What a great place! This personalized service, I'm telling you. You really feel like the only person in the world that matters."
Our room was on the fourteenth floor, which felt like an eternity during the slow, clunky elevator ride.
"I thought this place was supposed to be nice?" I said over the loud metallic grinding of the elevator car.
"Don't be a sourpuss." My dad nudged me in the side. "Wait till you see the room."
It wasn't exactly the Four Seasons, but we'd booked a modest-sized suite with two bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a small kitchen area. There was also a balcony with a stunning view of the water, which I supposed made up for being on the 14th floor. I threw my bag on my bed and pulled out my skimpiest swimsuit, a cherry-red speedo with the word "Maricón" on the thin strip of fabric just above my crack. Just as I'd slid on my flip flops, there was a knock at the door.
"Leo? You decent?" My father poked his head in and eyed me in my swimsuit. "Ah, you've already changed. You heading down to the beach?"
I grabbed a floppy sun hat from the table and pulled it on. "The pool, actually. You know I hate sand."
"We'll join you!" He stepped into my room. He was in his bathing suit as well, a short pair of swim trunks with the American flag on them. His hairy belly was slightly hanging over the waistband.
I pouted. "I was hoping to get some alone time."
He shut the door behind him and leaned against it, sighing. "Listen, son. Your mother was hoping we might be able to spend this trip together, as a family. Truth be told, I was kinda hoping that too."
He scratched the back of his head, the smell from his hairy armpit wafting toward my face and making me dizzy.
I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, that's what you said about the mission trip. We all know what happened there."
He smiled sadly. "Come on, son. Can't we put all that behind us and just have a good time? For your mother? Please?"
I chewed my lip. "Fine. Just don't expect me to sing Kumbaya or anything."
The pool was pretty packed when we got there. The sun beat down overhead, making me sweat. I put my towel down on a beach chair and began lathering myself in suntan lotion, wishing there was some hot daddy around to rub it into my skin for me. My own father went straight to the pool and did a cannonball, sending pool water splashing all over the concrete. Mom was hanging around the swim-up bar, flagging down a bartender.
Once I was sufficiently lathered, I pulled out my book and pretended to read. With my oversized sunglasses, I could scope out the pool for any potential fuckboys without being too obvious. Although the pool was packed, it was mostly families with little kids splashing around. There were a few hot dads waist-deep in the pool, holding babies with water wings wrapped around their fat little arms. I watched one of the burlier dads for a few minutes, wondering if I could get him away from his family long enough for a little hanky-panky. Was I willing to be a homewrecker? Maybe. Probably. But it all just seemed like so much effort. I only had a week--better to set my sights on lower-hanging fruit.
I didn't want to tan unevenly, so I put the book down and turned over onto my stomach. I had only been laying there for a few seconds when I heard a voice say, "Can I get you something to drink, señor?"
I lifted my head to see a tall, swarthy Mexican man smiling down at me. He seemed to be around his mid-20s, with wild black hair, a thin goatee, and small, circular glasses. He had on a tan uniform polo and a pair of bright blue swim trunks.
I rested on my elbows, slipping my sunglasses on the top of my head as I pondered. "Hmm... do you have something tropical? Maybe something sweet, but not too sweet?"
He flashed me a bright, sexy smile. "Let me guess. A piña colada?"
I giggled. "Wow. You're good."
He put his hand against his chest in a show of modesty. "It's a gift. I'm Mateo, by the way. I'll be taking care of you today."
I let my gaze linger on his hand. Long, slender fingers that would probably be just the thing to hit my boy button. I needed him.
"I'm Leo. Nice to meet you, Mateo."
"My pleasure. Are you having a good time here?"
I shrugged in what I imagined was a sexy, demure way. "It's been nice. How about you? Do you like working here?"
He grinned. "It's pretty chill. Great benefits, I get to hang out by the pool all day. Talk to interesting people such as yourself."
Interesting? Well that had to be code for fuckable. He was just being coy with all these people around.
"Tell me something, Mateo," I said, subtly flexing my butt cheeks. "How does a guy like you get into working here? I'd think you'd be working as a model. Or a go-go boy, at least."
He bit back a smile. "I'm from a little town not far away. El Viñedo."
"Sounds romantic."
"It's not." He smiled sheepishly. "My family is still there. I help out when I can."
