Connor the Swimmer

When the bell rang for lunch, I rushed to the toilets before making my way down to the fields. Riley, Zac and I usually sat between the basketball courts and the soccer field. We'd claimed that seat in Year 7 and never lost it. However, when I got to the table with our graffiti scratched all over it, my mates were nowhere to be seen. Instead, I saw something I'd never seen before; Nathanial sitting where Zac usually sat.

'Hey, what's going on?' Nathanial said, nodding his head in greeting.

I was sort of dumbfounded. Not lease of all because I had just seen his large dick that morning. Apparently, I couldn't separate the image from his handsome face anymore. 'Erm, hey,' was all I could say in response.

'Just wanted to stop in and say hi.' Nathanial continued, taking a bite out of his sandwich, 'What have you got on Saturday arvo?'

'Probably driving back from Wagga. The comp, remember?' I didn't even realise that I was just standing as still as a statue before him. I must have looked really stupid.

'Yeah, I mean after that? Do you wanna come around my house and celebrate? You know, me beating you I mean.' I chuckled but didn't answer. My mind was still racing. After an awkward pause, he continued, 'No but, maybe a couple of drinks, we could watch the footy. The Knights are playing, they're your team yeah?'

'Yeah, sure.'

'Is that a yes to you coming over, or to the Knights?'

'Erm to the Knights. I mean, yeah, maybe. I'll see if I have anything else going on.'

In that moment, Nathanial rubbed his crotch through his grey shorts. Usually, I wouldn't have taken any notice at all. However, two things had changed that. One, the mental image I now had of his dick and balls through the thin fabric. And two, the fact that he rubbed it a little too long to be normal. I glanced from his bulge to his striking blue eyes and back again. It was almost like he was -

'Rad.' Nathanial said suddenly and matter-of-factly, standing as Zac and Riley approached, loaded with pies, chips, and chocolate milk from the canteen, 'See you then.'

Nathanial walked off, leaving me standing exactly where I was when I first spotted him, unmoving.

'Dude, what was that about?' Riley asked.

"I don't know.' I said, staring gapingly after him before coming to my senses and grabbing a seat across from my mates. 'Hey, what are you guys up to tonight? We should work on that Science assignment together. Get it out of the way.'

'Dude, that's not due for ages.' Riley said, 'I got some more green, we should have some chill-out time instead.'

'Awesome.' Said Zac, munging into his pie already.

'Yeah but, we could get it out of the way.' I repeated, a bit weakly.

'Or -' Riley lifted his backpack onto his lap, opened it and pulled out a bag of weed, 'You could not be a little bitch and we could forget about school for a bit.'

'Man, put that shit away.' I spat, glancing around for the teacher on duty, 'Are you trying to get suspended?' Both of them just laughed, Zac coughing and spluttering for almost chocking on his food. 'Where are you getting that from anyway?'

'That's for me to know and for you to find out when you've stopped acting like a pussy.' Riley packed the small bag of weed into his backpack once more, 'Why are you being such a sped anyway?'

'Is your mind fucked from that shit already?' I said, starting to get a bit annoyed, 'The scholarship man, remember?'

'Dude, chill out.' Zac said, 'He just means that you're a little on edge. You need to take an arvo to relax for a bit.' I didn't say anything, so Zac continued, 'If not tonight, then what about this Saturday? We're having a party in the dunes.'

'Another party?'

'See, that's what I'm talking about dude!' Riley jumped up and pointed at me dramatically, 'You're being such a square man!'

'Whatever.' I said darkly, turning away from the two of them to look over the fields.

I had been hanging out with these two since kindergarten, and they were always into some wild stuff. Riley was a certified fire bug and Zac had always been a little notorious for stealing gnomes out of people's front yards and having a slightly unhealthy interest in knives and guns. In the last couple of months though, their interest in drinking and weed has skyrocketed to the number one spot. So much so, that I thought it was changing them sometimes.

Lost in thought, it took me a while before I realised that I was staring at Nathanial across the field. He was sitting in the shade of a tree, surrounded by a large group of guys and girls. His legs were long, and his shorts rode up high so that his bulge was pretty prominent, even from a distance. It took me a full thirty seconds before I tore my eyes away and looked back at my mates. Riley and Zac were now feigning sex noises as a couple of girls walked past and I couldn't help but laugh.

* * *

Work that afternoon was a drag. I couldn't help but think longingly of bed. Although, I knew Riley would call and bully me into going over to his house. I thought fleetingly, as I checked the air pressure of each of the bikes in the store, that maybe I could just work in the corner while my two mates smoked and drank. I knew that I was kidding myself though.

'When you've done that Connor, could you work the till for a while. I've got to duck out for a bit.'

'Sure, no worries.' I said, looking up to Helen waving at me as she headed out the door.

Going back to the tires, I shook my head. I was grateful that Helen and her husband had given me the job a couple of years ago. The bike shop was small but busy given that it was the only one in the small country town, unless you wanted to drive a couple of hours. Still, I had known since I started that Helen had had serious issues. Not least of all her drinking or gambling addiction. Sighing, knowing that she would be at the pub for hours, I finished checking the air pressure and made my way to the counter.

It was a slow afternoon with barely any customers. Some kids came in and wanted a new helmet, then a regular came in to buy some additions to his racing bike. I was thinking that it'd probably be better to close the shop when the last person I expected to see entered the store.

Nathanial made his way up and down the shelves, looking at nothing in particular. I watched him move throughout the store. He hadn't looked up at the counter once since he entered. Then, finally, he glanced up at me as if just realising that I'd been there for the first time.

'Can I help you?' I said, not really bothering to put on my customer service voice.

'Oh, hey, I didn't know you worked here.'

I stared. That seemed unlikely given that I'd worked there for years and I'm pretty sure that he'd been in a couple of times. Still, I decided not to mention that, rather saying, 'Yeah for ages man. What are you looking for?'

'Nothing really,' he responded, leaning against the counter, 'Just a bit bored to be honest. Are you alone right now?'

'Yeah.' I said, 'Whys that?'

'No reason really.' Was his answer.

I frowned. What was he on about? I looked him up and down as we stood in awkward silence for a few seconds. He was sweating a little through his white school shirt. His bag was slung over one of his shoulders in a manner that he might consider cool. His red converse shoes shuffled a little on the wood floors and his grey shorts contained a huge bulge. It almost looked as if -'

'Oh shit, yeah -' he said, noticing me looking down at his shorts. He held his bulge for a second so that his hard dick was clearly outlined through the fabric. Shaking it a little, he said quietly, 'I guess you're not the only one who can't control it.'

I chuckled nervously as his long fingers remained on his cock, moving it back and forth slowly. Gulping, I didn't care to take my eyes away. It was huge and, in all honesty, I wanted to see it once again.

'So, do you think you'd wanna -' he was cut off by the sound of the door chiming and a woman walking into the store.

His hand immediately dropped to his side, and he tried to act casual as the woman approached the counter, 'I know that you're nearly closed but I wanted to grab a bike. It's my daughter's birthday in the morning and I only just managed to get away from work. Have you got anything for under $50?'

'Of course, miss, come and have a look over here.' My customer service voice piped up. Glancing at Nathanial, I nodded, and he smirked before waving and moving out of the store.

* * *

That night, I lay in bed with my mind racing. There was a wave of panic whenever the thought of school assignments washed over me, despite the fact that I had spent three hours straight working on them when I got home from work.

Exhausted, I lay on my side, staring at the wall. "Anything not to think about work," I told myself. My mind jumped around for while before resting on Riley, remember the thoughts I had had that morning.

Riley had in fact sucked my dick once, and I his. It was probably the best experience of my life, but we had never spoken about it. In all the time that had passed, we simply did not mention it to each other and there had never been an awkwardness between us, which I was very thankful for. I supposed that Riley must have just been experimenting or was simply horny in the same way that the other guys from my sports teams had been in the past. By this point, I was convinced that a not insignificant portion of straight guys would experiment if they were horned up enough.

It was always a onetime thing though. Those straight, horny boys never came back for a second round, which disappointed me quite a bit. I had a boner by now and I could feel it pressing against the doona, creating a tent. I decided to turn onto my stomach and let my dick press against the bed. It felt good and I shuddered a little as I rubbed my body.

My thoughts then rested on Nathanial. The first image I had was of him in his white school polo-shirt and his little grey shorts. His long legs going all the way up to up to the hem which was right next to his crotch.

There was really no question that he was interest in doing something. I was very careful about misreading signals; however, it was really indisputable. He clearly had a boner in the shop and was rubbing it right in front of me.

My dick hardened, picturing him rubbing his bulge, before rewinding to the image of him lowing his speedos to the ground. My dick hardened as I saw his thick wet dick spring out as the waistband let it escape.

I began to hump the bed, imagining his dick getting hard and my mouth working down to it. My balls tingled and my shaft was sore with the weight of my body against the bed. The pleasure outweighed the pain though. I cuddled the mattrass and positioned my body just right to get maximum pleasure. Moaning under my breath, my face buried into my pillow and my hard dick spasmed as I shot cum everywhere.

'Fuck.' I muttered, knowing I'd have to clean up the mess now.

* * *

'Thanks Conner, now go put the trolley back.' Mum said as she closed the boot and lit up a cigarette.

I sighed and traipsed across the crowded carpark, the grocery trolley in front of me. The sun bore down to forge an unusually warm Friday afternoon. So much so that even my singlet and footy shorts felt like too much cover. Some girls turned to look at me as I put the trolley in the bay and I grimaced awkwardly. Part of me wondered if I should say something to one of them. They were all pretty after all, even I had to admit that. The moment passed, however, and I headed back across the carpark.

As I approached, mum was leaning against the car with the remaining half of her cigarette hanging from her mouth. I smiled at her and said, 'Can I have one?'

'What kind of mother do you think I am, giving my son a smoke?' However, she flung the packet into my hand and allowed me to light it up.

We stood in silence for a moment, both dragging the smoke from the cigarettes before Mum asked, 'How's Helen? Is she treating you okay?'

'Yeah, she's alright. I don't know how much longer her and her husband will be together though.'

'Don't go saying shit like that to the wrong people.' Mum punched my arm, 'She's a nice woman and you should be thankful.'

'I am thankful, I'm just saying that she's still pissing all her money up the wall.' I smirked.

'I don't want to here about it.' Mum said, but I knew that this was a lie. Mum would probably be repeating it at the pub that afternoon, 'What about school anyway, are you studying hard?'

'Yeah, I've got a lot of assignments but.' I said bitterly.

'Make sure you finish them all. God knows that you need to do better than your father, and Hamish, and me for that matter.'

'Mum, I -'

'Just work at it and don't let me or yourself down, alright?' Mum finished sternly.

I was a bit taken aback. Mum never commented on school, except for a token question about how the day had gone once and again. She never knew if I had homework or assignments. That's probably the reason that I was never interested in school before receiving the scholarship offer, 'Where's all this coming from all of a sudden?'

'Never mind that, just do as your told.' She said, putting her cigarette out on a lamppost before jumping in the driver seat of the car.

I was about to follow her when I spotted Riley across the street, 'Oi, Riley!' I shouted.

As Riley started to cross the street, I turned to mum through the open window and she sighed, 'Alright, just remember that I don't want you out all night making matchbox bombs.'

'Mum, that was one time, and I was, like, twelve.'

'Just behave.' She said simply.

When she ignited the engine, I said, 'Hey mum, can I have a smoke to give Riley?'

She threw me a look of outrage from behind her greying perm, 'You little shit, why the fuck would I do that?' She gave me the whole packet regardless and reversed away as Riley approached.

'Hey dude, wanna come and chill?'

* * *

We spent the evening riding around the skate park and showing off to the younger kids before heading back to Riley's house. His mum, Lorraine, welcomed me with a big hug and invited me to sit down for dinner.

It turned out to be roast lambs with potatoes and vegetables. I sat with Riley as well as his two sisters, his younger brother and Lorraine. After saying grace (a tradition I wasn't familiar with) we ate, accompanied by a lively discussion about the rugby league game that was on the previous night. It was such a contrast to my place where we always ate in the lounge room, the tv showing The Simpsons or the news. Maybe there was a point when mum, dad, Hamish and I sat at the dinner table together, but I can't remember. If it happened, it could have been before dad left.

Dinner was cleared and Lorraine served us all a bowel of strawberry ice-cream. Everyone was laughing and having a great time. Even I allowed myself to forget about the tsunami of assignments that plagued me. It was when Riley's youngest sister, Jane, poked her tongue out and mimicked Donald Duck (much to everyone's mirth) that we heard the front door slam.

I was a bit shocked, bit all of Riley's family seemed to jump a foot in the air. Seconds later, his father, John appeared in the doorway of the dining room. He was a big man, tall, muscular but with a belly. His moustached face was contorted with rage as he stared directly across the table at Riley.

'Young man,' he spat, 'We have to have a chat.'

It was terrible. Of course, having known Riley all my life, I had been around when he had been in trouble before, but not this much trouble. It turned out that John had found Riley's bag of weed in his bedroom. And being a policeman, as well as an old-school stiff-upper-lip Aussie, didn't take to kindly to this.

It seemed to go on for an age. John shouted, threatened and spanked Riley multiple times. I couldn't see anything, but I could hear everything. When Riley was finally dismissed, he walked right past his silent family and I, and into his bedroom. I glanced at Lorraine who looked a little saddened, before getting up and joining Riley in his room.

Upon entering, I saw Riley wiping away a few tears, grabbing the packet of smokes I had handed to him earlier, and heading for the window. 'Come on, lets get the fuck out of here.'

I followed him out the window and onto our bikes which we rode silently through the night to the edge of the river. Dumping our bikes by the trees, we headed for the riverbank, still not saying anything. It wasn't the darkest of nights. There were a lot of stars in the sky, so many in fact that we decided to take our shirts off and use them as pillows, laying on the sands of the riverbank to stare up at them. After a while, Riley suddenly started talking about aliens and the universe. He told me a story about his uncle and how he had seen a UFO on his farm once. He was convinced that we weren't alone. I didn't really know what I believed but, being a huge fan of Star Wars, I tended to agree with him.

After a while, Riley suddenly said, 'Sorry you had to hear that bro.

'Aye, I've known you forever, its not the first time I've seen your dad like that.' There was quiet and then, I added, 'Are you okay man?'

Riley didn't say anything at first, then, 'I'm just over it bro. I wanna get out of here. My cousin has a place in Sydney. I might just fuck school right off and go there.'

I felt a bit of panic at this sentence, and turned to him, 'You're so close to finishing, don't give up now.'

'I don't care.' He muttered.

I didn't believe him, 'Hey, you're super smart man, you need to finish. You'll be the first in the family to graduate High School, don't let that go.'

Riley scoffed, 'I just wanna make some money. My cousin said he can get me a job as a bricklayer.'

'Dude,' I turned to face him in the darkness, 'You can do anything you want. You can be a scientist, or a doctor or a teacher.' The last one was a joke; I know he'd be disgusted by thought.

Riley laughed and reached over the squeeze my arm. 'Thanks bro.' I expected Riley to let go of me after a couple of seconds, but he didn't. After a while, an electric bolt ran through me as he held it.

There was silence between us, then he said, 'Come on, let's go back to mine.'

* * *

Swimming comp days were always fun, not least because there were almost a hundred guys in speedos. I always found a bit of time to look at the bulges, small and large. Although, I was a little distracted that day. Peter had me warming up in separate pool immediately and by the time the man over the loudspeaker announced that the 18s races would start, I was nervous.

Still, I raced my heart out. As soon as I dived off the block, my mind went blank. I moved mechanically through the water, my stroking and kicking being the only thing stemming from my mind. Freestyle, turn and back, as fast as I could. Then butterfly, then breaststroke, and then backstroke.

By the time the races were up, I was a bit of a wreck. I clung onto the edge of the pool, beneath a woman who was holding a stopwatch. Peter was somewhere around too but I wasn't really aware of it. I simply breathed deeply, allowing the shouting, cheering, laughing and whatever other noises the hundreds of people were making, pass in one ear and out the other.

I eventually hobbled out of the water, quivering, and reaching desperately for my drink bottle.

'You did very well mate.' Peter said, patting me on the back. 'When you get your breath back, I'll take you to meet some of the Sydney people.'

I nodded, still panting. I grabbed my towel and buried my face in it, trying to drown out the rest of the world. My legs shook and I had goosebumps all over from the cool breeze and cloudy sky.

I took as long as I dared to dry myself before following Peter to the stands. Nerves that I never experienced when I was actually in the water, started to return as I wandered past groups of people, all of whom took no notice of me. Except Nathanial who, I didn't have much interaction with, but patted me on the back as I passed. I wanted to stop but coach kept me moving.