For three days I had avoided him and told myself that I was such an idiot to let myself get talked into sucking his cock; that was how I felt most of the time, although there were other times I found myself getting turned on when I thought about his hard cock in my mouth. Still, I kept telling myself that I wasn't turned on by his cock and I wasn't going to every do that again.
At eighteen I had established my independence from my strict – and sometimes cruel father – and I wasn't going to get caught up with this older guy that was just an extension of my father. I wasn't turned on by guys and I wasn't going to get caught in such an embarrassing position again; on my knees sucking a guy's cock.
As I said before, I had avoided him for three days – mostly by staying in my apartment – but I had to go out to the store and Barbara wanted me to come over; with Barbara it was always sex, so this was my chance to prove to myself that it was a onetime thing -- sucking cock – and get back to having sex with a girl.
I was walking across the parking lot trying not to look at his apartment – if he didn't see me, I wouldn't have to deal with him – and just wanted to get to my car and get out of here for awhile. No such luck. I was almost to my car when I heard his apartment door open (ignored him and get out of here).
"Where you've been hiding?" He called out as I got to my car.
"I..hav..haven't..." I started to say.
"Ah it's OK," he cut me off, "come over here so I can get a look at you."
He was wearing a white terrycloth robe that was tied at his waist and I imagined that he was naked underneath it. I hesitated at my car with the keys in my hand (just open the fucking door, start the car and get the fuck out of here). He smiled (an evil smile) and motioned me with his hand to come over.
"Come on," he said again, "just want to see how you're doing. I won't keep you long."
(Yeah, just long enough to suck him off; get the fuck out of here)
"Well, I really...really...I need to...get going." I couldn't believe how nervous and intimidated I felt; I couldn't even look at him.
"Yeah, you've said, but I already told you that I won't keep you long." It was just like my dad talking to me and I always did what my dad said.
"O...OK." Was all I could manage as I started walking over to where he was standing in the doorway of his apartment.
(What the fuck...why don't I get the hell out of here) he smiled as I approached him and stepped aside and motioned me to come inside his apartment (don't you dare go inside) and I walked into his front room; the same front room I'd been in three days ago.
"Take off your coat and sit for a minute." He said walking past me, "I'll be right back." And he walks down the hallway toward his bedroom.
(Don't you sit down...get the fuck out of here) and I did as he asked and sat on the couch. He was down there doing something (getting naked?) and I could feel my heart beating and I was breathing hard in anticipation. Then he was back in the front room, but he wasn't naked; he was still wearing his robe (maybe he does just want to talk). He came over and sat in the Easy Chair that was right to the left of where I sat on the couch.
"So, we haven't talked since the other day." He was looking at me as he talked.
"Yeah, I've been...I mean, I meant to see how...or to talk to you..." I couldn't talk or think straight with him watching me like this.
"Hey, it's not that big a deal," he started (not to you, you're the one that got off in my mouth), "it was just one of those things.
"Yeah." Was all I could manage.
"Have you thought about it?" I knew he was trying to see if I was willingly to suck him off again.
"No...no...not really." I found myself looking down as I talked.
"Well," he started, "I've thought about it a lot as you can see."
