I am losing my ability to cope. All I can think about is Cody. I've been locked in this chastity cage for almost a month, a cage Cody has the key to. A cage he locked me in because it amuses him, without bothering to ask my permission. My opinion on the matter wasn't important to him -- still isn't. I see that now. Each time I see him, I pray he will remove it, pray I will get some relief from the throbbing of my full, aching balls, but it never happens. Always, I show it to him, reminding him it's there, silently pleading with him to remove it, even for a moment. Even the brief chance to feel my dick get fully hard, free of this unyielding plastic prison, would be paradise. But each time he just laughs, then ignores both the cage and my pleas.
The cage remains a part of me, a part I hate, the extra weight between my legs a constant reminder of Cody, keeping me always right on the edge, always in a state of desperate need.
His use of me changes. At first, it was simple: he was a horny, busy, straight jock that liked getting his cock sucked, perhaps his feet massaged. But now, it's gone far beyond that. Each time he summons me, he pushes further, finds new ways to use me, new ways to test my devotion to him and the limits of my willingness to obey him. Each time he does, I am shocked at how far I will go, how much I am willing to put up with for the opportunity to worship his cock, for the opportunity to grovel at his feet and serve such a beautiful alpha male.
Previously, I knew what to expect. Now, I have no idea what he will demand when he summons me. But at least the summons come more often now. Several times a week, usually. Once, I was summoned twice in one day; first, in the evening, so he could feed me his cock and cum, then much later, right before he headed to bed. The second time he didn't even let me inside, just walked out to where I was kneeling on the patio and pulled out his cock. As soon as my mouth opened, he began to piss. The cruel bastard wouldn't even allow me to hold his cock in my mouth, but instead held it just out of reach. As soon as he was done, he unlocked my collar and sent me on my way. His message was clear: you are here to serve me, no matter how trivial my needs, any time, any way I want it. I drove forty minutes round trip in the middle of the night just to be his urinal, and didn't even get to touch his body.
I hate this treatment. At the same time, I love him for it. My need for him grows daily. The more he uses me, the more demanding he is, the more I crave him. And I hate that.
But I can't stop.
I want nothing more than to plead with him, to beg him with every fiber of my being to remove this horrible cage, to allow me to fully worship him the way I used to, but I know better than to speak in his presence. So instead, I send him the most pathetic texts in existence. Groveling. Promising. Begging like I never knew I could beg; begging to worship him like a god, begging to serve him, begging to suffer for him, if only he will allow me to, if only he will remove the cage so I can have my life back. I read these texts later, and I am ashamed of myself, disgusted by how sniveling and pathetic they make me sound. But I can't seem to stop myself from writing them. Every time I read them, I swear I will stop, will put an end to my virtual groveling. But then my balls start to throb with their unspent cum, and I find myself composing yet another pathetic text of submission, hoping it will convince Cody to have mercy on me.
But he never does.
I will do anything he wants. Anything. And he knows it. Then I realize: this is another lesson he is teaching me. Another of his wordless, practical, painful lessons in how to obey him. A lesson that pleasing him is all that matters.
Cody never deigns to respond to my messages. When he replies, it is only to summon me for more service. Never any words, just a time he wants me.
To him, I'm nothing more than a tool to use.
Then, the silence comes.
Two weeks, and nothing. No summons. I for him to use me, but nothing. I am out of my mind, both with horniness and with fear, fear that this is the end and my jock god has forsaken me.
My hormones rage, with no relief in sight. I have no idea when he will remove the cage, if ever. Perhaps this is forever? I shove that thought aside, unable to fathom what that would be like. Lately, the closest I can get to release is when he fucks me, when his thrusts milk some of the pent-up cum out of my balls, even though there is no pleasure in it, ejaculation with no climax. I am desperate for release. I buy a dildo, a big one that reminds me of Cody's cock, but without the perfection of size and shape his has. I ride the dildo, fucking myself with it, hoping it will scratch the itch deep inside me, but it's not the same. It only makes things worse, makes me crave the real thing even more. Despite that, I keep fucking myself with it. It's all I've got.