I sat on the beach and watched the setting sun. My sister Maria invited me to vacation in Puerto Rico for a week with her husband Juan and their son Danny. She thought it would be good to get in touch with family roots. We got lucky for early September. No rain. No hurricanes. It was a beautiful afternoon.
The beach was pretty empty. I had walked a bit from the hotel to blow off some steam and finally sat on the sand where I felt I could be alone.
If she was so proud of her heritage, why were we staying in a fucking hotel.
I shouldn't complain though. Maria has been really gracious in letting me stay with her and her family since the beginning of the year when I lost my job. I've been picking up a few side jobs here and there but nothing consistent enough to move out yet.
43 years old, not allowed to drink on a vacation where I'm rooming with my 18-year-old nephew. Underneath my anger, I felt like a fucking loser.
"Tio..." I was surprised to hear my nephew Danny behind me. "I finally found you," he said, out of breath.
I turned around to see him bent over and panting with a beach towel in one hand and a bottle of Medalla Light Beer in the other. I didn't say anything. I couldn't. I was caught speechless as the setting sun bathed his caramel brown in a warm glow. His long black straight hair hung over his wide shoulders, left uncovered by his neon green tank top. His pink short shorts barely contained slim but muscular thighs leading down to tight calves and large bare feet. As he lifted his head, the sun reflected in his welcoming brown eyes. He was completely hairless aside from the hair on his head and some attempt at a mustache that topped his beaming smile.
"Sorry about mom. I'll leave these back here... y'know, in case you want them. Hope you enjoy that brownie." And after a wink and smile, he placed both the towel and Medalla in the sand a few feet behind me and started a jog back to the hotel.
Maria and I just had our first fight in months. I've had drinking problems in the past, but that was the past. She hasn't realized I've changed or that I've been trying, and her "rules" like no beer or wine with dinner set me off. As I left dinner, Danny handed me a brownie and said "It'll make you feel better, I promise." I didn't know what he was talking about but I was hungry so I ate it on the way here.
If I'm being honest, Danny is the biggest reason I've changed. No matter what, he's always got a smile on his face and he's always been kind to me even when I was an asshole. It can't be easy being out and gay like he is, especially with my side of the family... but he does it.
And I don't even mind staying in the same room with him. We had to share a room for a few days back in July, and as far as I know, he didn't say anything to Maria about me getting shitfaced that first night...or about me sleeping naked. I don't feel judged and that makes me want to be better.
As the sun set, I closed my eyes and smiled. I could hear nothing but waves and the sound of impending nightfall. I felt at peace and one with myself and the world around me. I could feel the wind blow through each strand of the hair that covered my body from head to toe. My senses were heightened, from the smell of the beach to the touch of my feet on the sand...wet sand...
Fuck
.
The tide had moved in and I didn't notice. It finally dawned on me that I had scarfed down a pot brownie. Laughing, I got up, shorts partly soaked along with the back of my t-shirt. I picked up the beer and beach towel and moved further back on the beach. Looking around, the beach was empty. The temperature was warm, but not hot... keeping the wet shorts on probably wasn't a great idea.
Fuck it.
I tossed off my shorts and boxers, set down the towel and laid down half naked.
Laying down felt like jumping into the pool of my own self-consciousness. My high hit me fully and every inch of my skin felt vibrant and free in the night air. As I closed my eyes, I envisioned my own body from a bird's eye view. 5'7" laying on my back, hands under my head, the top of which is covered in curly, thick black and grey hair. My face is clean-shaven for the first time all year, revealing a strong jawline that fit with my masculine brow. The t-shirt can't hide sizable pecs and a thick torso. I'm a muscular guy, a bit slimmed down in the last few months to a hefty 190 lbs. My tan, Puerto Rican skin is mostly covered by thick curly black and grey hair from my feet, up my strong calves, on to my meaty thighs and to my forest of a crotch.
My view dives in closer to admire the exposed package between my spread-out legs. I don't remember the last time I trimmed my pubic hair. But no matter how thick and long the curly black hair gets, my dick and balls are always easy to find. Even soft, my several inches of uncut meat hang in the moonlight. My dick sits on top of two globes encased in my flesh sack resting on the towel.
I hadn't smoked any weed in almost 20 years. I forgot how it felt...how it made me feel. But I soon remembered as I felt warmth radiate down my chest and up my legs, meeting in the depth of my balls and slowing making its way to the tip of my dick. This might be my only private time before going back to the room with Danny.
I wonder what he would think of my dick.