Toby rang my phone after work one evening.
"You could raise that lazy carcass off the couch and come fetch your new coffee table I have finished. I'm afraid it won't fit in my snazzy sports car unless I chop it into kindling, boss."
"No chopping allowed. Guess you need an upgrade to a more versatile and practical SUV. That sports car draws too much attention, anyway. I've seen the heads turn when you go around melting the pavement."
"Showcases my trim physique and my surfer suaveness, dude. No SUV will draw the eyeballs like my baby. And I wouldn't have all those manly rubberneckers to wink at, now would I?"
"As long as they don't wink back," I admonished him. "You'd best not be flirting with anyone but me," I warned.
"No time to flirt or wink since I've been sanding and refinishing your new coffee throne. Hope you found some nice books to display on it. Wait, did you hear that, boss?"
"Hear what?" I asked, mystified. "All I'm hearing is your whining about no time to flirt."
"There it is again! I heard it, clear as day. It was the Purple People Pleaser calling shotgun! I knew it! It wants to ride along with you when you come for the table!"
I groaned, hating I had fallen for his shenanigans. "Maybe I'll just send it solo to pick up the table. Sounds like you need it more than you need me. Hope it helps you load the table, scout," I added, acting like I was going to end the call.
"No way, boss! I need your rippling muscles and your quick wit and your sexy, sweaty self to fetch this here monster of a table. That piddly purple prick just can't compare."
"Flattery will get you everything you want. And probably stuff you don't. Tell you what. Instead of your precious purple prodder, how about I bring Big Blue?"
Big Blue?! What's that, bossman?"
"Oh, just a little surprise. Or make that a BIG surprise. It makes that purple probe look like my little dicklet. Without a foreskin, of course. It's big enough to take on boys like you, I bet. And leave you wanting more. But since you heard the puny purple one calling shotgun..."
"Wait, boss! I can hear Big Blue shouting over the purple one, telling it that it's a pussy, and how he is going to ride with you instead, and that the pathetic purple excuse for a prick can crawl back into whatever hole he came out of. And wither away. Heard it clear as a bell."
"I think you're delirious and delusional," I sighed. "Or drunk. Maybe I'll have to take your temperature when I get there. Anally, of course. And maybe give you a shot of something to make you better."
"I bet Big Blue could help you with that. Hurry on over, now. I think I'm breaking into a cold sweat and my temperature is rising. Along with other things."
"Playing doctor with you will be a first. But I promise it will be a thorough exam. No hole left unprobed. My new medical motto." I hung up and went for my Jeep keys. And I tucked Big Blue under my arm.
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Toby was lying on top of my coffee table stark naked. He grinned up at me with a wolfish sneer. "Time to test out my workmanship, boss. Break in this baby right. See if the legs wobble even a little. Climb aboard, bossman. But you might lessen the load a bit by ditching those duds."
From what little I could see of the table under Toby's sprawled form, it was a lovely shade of blue, a mysterious color that hinted at both purple and green, but very subtly. He had distressed the edges and patches here and there, giving it a timeworn, vintage feel, and had added some antique hardware on its storage drawer, along with some accent corners in the same metal. It was exactly the refurbishing it needed.
"Not sure which is the work of art here, scout. You, or this fantastic hunk of furniture your shapely ass is gracing."
"The hunk would be on top, here," he crowed, massaging his thick chest carpet and pinching his rosy nipples. "Now, are you gonna join me, or just stand there getting that foreskin all wet and dripping for me? That tasty tube needs a little bit of lovin'. And my tonsils need a little bit of your slick stuff right this minute. How about it? Been thinking of your precum popsicle all day. Or maybe I should say popsuckle?"
"Sicle or suckle, I'm in," I agreed, dropping my pants and stripping off the rest of my clothes as quickly as possible. "And here I thought you were just welcoming Big Blue."
"We'll make time for him later. Right now, I'm hungry for tubesteak with lots of gravy. And since it's attached to you, you've gotta climb on up here and feed me my treat."
I awkwardly straddled Toby and the table, afraid to bear too much weight on the table. I remembered how wobbly it was when we bought it, and I didn't want it to collapse before I even got it home. I didn't spare a thought for Toby. I had weighed him down before. No worries about him wilting under me.
"It's okay, Jace. I reinforced this sucker well. You can sit on me and it with no heebie jeebies. Plop on down here to give me better access," he licked his lips in anticipation.
Taking him at his word, I plunked down on his chest, taking over the massaging of his luxurious hair and pinching of his rosy nipples. I raised his arms and tickled his abundantly hairy armpits, making him squirm and shriek, him bucking so that he almost unseated me. His ball weight thumped against the top of the table, and I scolded him. "You're gonna scar up my table with your nutrock, nut. I don't want it scratched up from your thrashing." I tickled him again visciously, stopping only to grab hold of his woolly chest to anchor myself more securely as he tried to escape.
"I can't suck you if you keep doing that, boss," he gasped, trying to catch his breath. "And I really need to. Scout's honor," and he had the audacity to do that silly salute.
"How bad, poet? Bad enough to buck me off here?" I attacked his armpits and his ribs in turn, reducing him to a quivering, giggling, gasping pile of mush. Except for his hale and hearty cock, of course. It waved and wiggled as he jerked, flapping into my back and against my ass. I backed up a bit and ground my asscheeks against its hardness. Toby thrashed more enthusiastically.
"No, boss, not that. Not yet. I need your cum so bad. I need to taste it and swallow it down and feel you in my mouth and throat and taste you on my tongue. Please, Jace, please put your cock in my mouth and let me please your popsicle. It'll be a treat for both of us, I promise. I'll do a good job, and the way you're leaking and dripping on me, I don't think you'll regret it. Please, please, boss. Let me have it right this minute."
I scooted up his chest again, pausing to pinch those tempting nipples one more time before giving in to his begging. I let my cock leak on his lips for a moment, puddling the precum there, Toby licking it up greedily as I smeared it with the tip of my tube. He nibbled at my foreskin, nipping it very gently with his teeth, before sucking the whole thing deep into his hot, wet mouth.
His tongue caressed my tube, slipping under it and circling my cockhead with syrupy, slurping noises, Toby groaning in pleasure and satisfaction as he devoured my peter popsicle with such finesse and skill that he had me gasping and thrashing instead.
He let his treat pop out of his mouth to lick at my balls, sucking them one at a time, then together, sliding them both in and out, slicking them up and matting my ball hair, styling it with his tongue and lips, then restyling it as he lapped them in a different direction.
"Ball hair stylist. A new talent for you to advertise, hoss. I'll give you a good review on Yelp," I teased him, acting like it was ho-hum for him to be devouring my nuts.
He slipped my marbles out long enough to glare up at me. "I'll make you yelp, all right. Get ready, bossman" and he attacked both my cock and balls with a vengeance, suctioning and slurping and licking and almost knocking me off him in his quest to conquer my cum. I was the one shrieking now, trying to halt his frontal attack, him plundering my privates and pillaging with his tongue in places I didn't know existed. He was unstoppable, however, and he gobbled my goods until I was begging him to finish me and let me shoot deep in his throat. I grabbed onto his head, gripping his hair as he bobbed and slobbered, urging him on as the sensations of sparklers turned into bottle rockets and then Roman candles, finally a blazing burst of flame, colors, and white light as I exploded my cum into him, ribbon after ribbon of floating flame, fire shooting down his gullet and onto his tongue for him to finally get his tasty treat. And yelp I truly did, damn his eyes. Howled like a wild, raging, ravenous beast, grabbing Toby's hair to keep myself from flying into orbit.
I settled back to earth, shaking and sweating in the aftermath, still grasping Toby's hair in a death grip. It's a wonder I hadn't yanked it out. "You can let go now, boss. I was having a bad hair day anyway. No damage done," he smirked, so pleased with himself it was pitiful.
