I have never been a true believer... to me, it seems the rich and powerful use religion to keep the masses of people under control... there is too much hypocrisy in every religion... the true believers seem to have their own agenda regardless of their God's teachings.
Take Islam, for example, homosexuality is strictly forbidden and condemned, yet I saw and heard of many same-sex relationships while working in Saudi Arabia... and after my arrest and conviction on drug charges, I experienced first-hand one of those frowned-upon 'bromances.'
I had suffered a relatively minor injury at work, but the pain and discomfort was enough for me to search out more effective painkillers than what was available over-the-counter.
A Saudi co-worker hooked me up with a friend-of-a-friend-type thing who furnished me with 'the good stuff,' and by the time I was ready to return to America, I was addicted and tried to smuggle a couple large bottle of pills onto the airplane-well, I was arrested and taken to trial the next day.
No one spoke English the whole time... my demands to meet with the American Consulate fell on deaf ears... I wasn't given a lawyer... the courtroom proceeding took less than two-minutes... the prosecutor said a few Arabic words-the judge said a few Arabic words then pounded his gavel-I was then handcuffed and whisked away to prison... it was a mockery of justice-a sham trial!!
It all happened so fast it made me wonder if it had been prearranged. My head was dizzy with outrage, but there was nothing I could do or say.
At the prison, I was strip-searched, and scrubbed down in the shower room. The guards all seemed to take my presence with a certain glee. They took liberties with me I didn't see them take with other prisoners.
One man, who I assumed was a doctor, wore a latex glove and first examined my mouth. I have good teeth and that was what I thought he was looking at, but when he forced his large middle finger in my mouth, he said in broken English, "Close your lips around my finger!"
For the life of me I had no idea what this exercise would accomplish, but I obeyed him, and when he slowly moved his finger in-and-out from between my lips, it occurred to me this was an extremely lewd and suggestive act.
I furiously blushed and when the doctor and two guards laughed so hard I thought they would split their sides, I realized the humiliation was intentional.
Next, the two guards forced me to bend over... they kicked my legs so wide apart I would have fallen if they'd let go of me. The doctor stood in front of me and made a grand show of coating the same middle finger with some sort of oil.
He then disappeared behind me and I felt the finger press against my anus. I struggled in the arms of the guards, but of course, they were too strong for me. I am only 5'7" and a hundred-and-thirty pounds... there are not many men smaller than me.
Suddenly, he pushed the finger all the way inside my hole, I screamed at the humiliation and pain... the men laughed again. I could feel the palm of his hand flat on my buttocks, his finger was indeed, all the way inside my asshole.
I took a deep breath and waited. Instead of removing the finger from me, he seemed to be swirling it around inside me... then he slowly removed it to the tip and plunged it back inside me.
I couldn't help myself—I sprung a boner which caused all the men to laugh again.
One of the guards magically produced a tape measure and measured my erection. I looked down and knew what I'd see-three-and-a-half inches... they burst into laughter one more time and my face felt like it was on fire from the embarrassment.
Once they had their fun with me, I was given a pair of short briefs to wear which were pink... at first I thought once again they were trying to humiliate me, but then I noticed the other prisoners were given similar colored-briefs... I figured the briefs turned pink when they were washed with the red overalls the prisoners wore.
I slipped into them and discovered they were too tight, and just barely concealed my, uh, 'package'... I protested I needed another size, but my complaints were ignored.
I stepped into the red overalls and pulled-up the zipper in front. They were made of a heavy, and scratchy fabric that irritated my skin, but I was grateful they hid my extremely white flesh from these Arab men's beady eyes.
They led me down a long row of cells on both sides... I could see two men in each small cell. A metal bed hung suspended on the walls, and a metal toilet in the far corner-a very spartan existence... no frills-no amenities.
The prisoners were dark-skinned, and dangerous-looking. My heart began pounding as I pictured myself being locked-up with one of these men. I hadn't had the time to give prison-life much thought, but the stark reality of the tiny cells brought my predicament sharply into focus.
Men locked in cells on both sides of me shouted Arabic obscenities that scared the hell out of me. Having worked with many Saudi's, I understood most of what they were yelling: "Ya qooq" (you pussy) - "Ya coos" (you cunt) - ""Moss ayri" (suck my dick) - "Ya khawal" (you faggot) - "Badi aneek kosik" (I want to fuck your pussy)... it didn't take long for my body to begin to violently tremble and shake.
And then the unthinkable came to mind: there was a good chance I would be forced into sex tonight with another man... my stomach became queasy... I felt like throwing up... I don't care if some men are gay, but I'd never personally been 'into' that lifestyle.
I breathed a sigh of relief when we passed the last of the cells; we continued walking... we finally stopped at the end of the hallway, and on the right-hand side was the communal shower room.
We turned left and stood in front of a large, heavy iron door. The guard put a key in the latch and opened it and motioned for me to go inside.
The moment I was inside, the heavy door clanged shut behind me. I tried to focus as I my eyes scanned all around me. It wasn't like the other cells-there were no bars; this one was totally enclosed and much larger. It contained some creature comforts that almost made it appear to be a small apartment.
Instead of the metal beds suspended from the walls, there was a queen-size mattress on the floor on the far left-hand side. I saw a bathtub with a shower attachment, and saw a weight bench with barbells.
Then I noticed the big, dark-complected man sitting on what appeared to be a loveseat... he was reading a newspaper and wore only boxer shorts. He had briefly looked at me when I entered the cell but went right back to reading the newspaper.
My first thought was 'This can't be right'... 'Where will I sleep?'... 'What am I doing in here and not one of the regular prison cells?'
I heard the man set down the paper and then he spoke to me, "Little one, remove your boots and socks and come sit beside me!"
His English surprised me. He seemed different from the other prisoners; more cultured and refined.
I froze in place. I became acutely aware of his powerful biceps and chest. He was ruggedly handsome, probably ten-fifteen years older than me. He was maybe 6'1" and two-hundred pounds.
"Do not make me repeat myself... " he scolded me with a frown, "... your life here will be mostly pain-free-as long as you obey me... now take off your boots and socks and sit beside me!"
My mind screamed and my body shook and quivered with abject fear-OH MY GOD-WHAT DO I DO NOW?
I stupidly turned and tried to open the heavy metal door and, of course, it was locked. I cried out: "GUARD-GUARD-GUARD" but no one came to my rescue.
The man spoke again. "You have now earned yourself a very painful spanking-take-off the boots and socks and get over here!"
I stared at him-he was deadly serious! His threatening words were enough to make me bend over and do as he had ordered. I tucked the socks into the boots and placed the boots where he had pointed. I grudgingly walked to the loveseat and sat beside him.
He was a big man, and there wasn't room enough for the both of us... our legs pressed firmly against one another. He immediately put his large arm over my shoulders and hugged me tighter to him.
Sharp jolts of fear raced up-and-down my spine; my heart began pounding, and a lump formed in my throat. I knew for sure my worst fears were about to come true and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it... if I fought him, he'd beat the living crap out of me!
With the slightest of smiles on his face, he said, "Do not be afraid, little one, I will break you in slowly... "
That's when the hairs on the back of my neck stood straight-'I will break you in slowly'? I knew damn-well what he meant by that, and what it meant for my future. I had to give it one last try.
"Uh, s-sir, t-there must be some kind of mistake... " I stammered, "... I, uh, I'm not gay or anything-I've never been with a man in that way!"
He replied without a trace of a smile, "I understand, little one, but you are here for my pleasure-not yours... however, if you give yourself to me freely, I believe you will find great fulfillment in your submission!"
HUH? WHAT? His words hit me hard-I now knew for sure there was no way out of this terrible situation!
He shocked me by kissing my cheek then whispering, "You are even more beautiful than I remember from the market... yes, you will do just fine."
Market? He saw me at a market? Did he arrange for me to be arrested and sent here? Who is this man?
His shorts began tenting-outward and I was gripped with a very real fear. OH MY GOD-this big and strong Arab man was going to make me do things for him-things I never imagined doing with a man in my life!
He reached over with his right-hand and lowered the zipper of my overalls-I instinctively put my hand on his to stop him.
Before I knew what happened, he clutched my throat with a powerful hand and squeezed until I saw stars dancing before my yes.
"You belong to me now, little one... I will do with you as I please... if you cooperate, you will learn to enjoy obeying my commands... if not, you will suffer unimaginable pain... either way, you will eventually do everything I tell you so you may as well make it easy on yourself and obey me now rather than later!"
I coughed when he released his stranglehold on my neck; I choked back sobs, and fought the tears in my eyes. It wasn't much of a choice... suffer unbelievable pain, or perform sexual acts for this man!
"You will always address me as 'Sahib'... when I tell you to do something you will happily say 'Yes, Sahib'... do you understand me, little one?"
My first test. "Y-Yes, Sahib," I quickly replied.
I didn't try to stop him this time when his hand pulled down my zipper opening the front of my overalls. He caressed and fondled my breasts; his fingers pinched my nipples so hard I gave off a tiny yelp of pain.
"Remove your garments!" he ordered. "Until you earn the right to wear clothing-you will remain naked in here!"
THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!! I had never experienced such utterly helpless despair in my entire life!
"Y-Yes, Sahib," I said; faced with the prospect of sex with a man, and the painful alternative if I didn't obey him, I numbly stripped-off the scratchy overalls then reluctantly pushed the briefs down my legs... I sat beside him extremely aware of my nudity.
Becoming a man's bitch-boy had never entered my mind, but now, the decision was easy... I would do things for him to avoid extreme pain-not because I wanted to.
I had never felt so weak and helpless as I sat naked next to the big man. His hands roamed freely over my body... at one point, his hand dove between my legs and cupped my penis and balls... he squeezed my balls until I cried out in pain... he chuckled and kissed my cheek.
I didn't know what he found so funny... there was nothing at all funny about having to let this man have his way with me.
