An Oral Agreement

There are no secrets quite like sexual secrets. What would be unspeakable in public can become common habit in the privacy of one’s home and bed. Most of these secrets are of the solitary kind -methods of masturbation and sexual fantasies, stashes of hidden pornography, or the vibrator in the nightstand drawer. If one were to collect and compare these deeply private vices, one might be amused and surprised to find just how common most of them are.

Some secrets are kept among select groups of people. Swingers and wife swappers, masters and mistresses, suburban housewife prostitutes. Even the most white bread neighborhood can be home to deeply embarrassing and scandalous behavior.

The (not quite) true story of Alex and Craig serves as an example of how such secret arrangements come to be shared and formed. By some standards, what they did is no great scandal, but by the values of common society, would be seen as perverse and aberrant. To them, it simply evolved as a matter of logic, a way of solving a mutual problem.

That problem is well known to many single young men -sexual frustration. Added to that the inherent limitations of living with another person. Even if one were lucky enough to score a hot date, how to take her home and not have to worry about the presence of their roommate? In Alex and Craig’s case, hot dates were pretty far and few between anyway. It wasn’t that they were unattractive, far from it, but even the most handsome youth can be socially awkward. This was most especially the case for Alex, who had come away from college with what could be called a purely academic education.

The taller blonde, Craig, was not quite as unsuccessful at finding dates, and on this night had left with a young woman whose name Alex didn’t have the time to catch. Probably very attractive, whoever she was, Alex thought darkly. Craig had the lean good looks that usually earned attention from the opposite sex. Alex was a bit too skinny, and a bit too unfashionable to do the same. He actually was cute in an offbeat kind of way.

On these nights, there was at least one advantage to being left alone. Reaching under his bed, he pulled out a few adult rated DVDs and set himself up on the couch with a few beers and a handy towel. Yes, he could envy Craig for going out and getting some action, but unless they were going to head over to her place after their date, Alex was the only one having an orgasm tonight.

Of course that was the tough thing about having to live in a roommate situation. No privacy. It was frustrating for a number of reasons. The good thing is that they did manage to get along, and shared a lot of common interests and a similar intellectual bent of mind.

As the two women on screen began to explore each other in a way that was beyond casual, Alex slipped off his jeans and began touching himself. Downing his second beer, he kept his erection in a pleasantly erect state, not letting himself get too aroused in order to draw this out. It felt so good just to be alone and enjoy this freedom. Watching these figures on screen made him wonder what it was like, not only to be with a woman, but also to actually BE a woman. The vagina was such a mysterious little hole; how did it feel to have it filled up? And what fun that clitoris, which let women have as many orgasms as they wanted in a single spell. Damn lucky beasts.

Eyes half closed and mind buzzing, Alex milked some precum onto this fingers and felt the rising thrill go through his cock. It would be impossible to hold back very much longer. He stroked his shaft with taut fingers, the sweat starting to collect on his brow.

When the apartment door suddenly opened, he’d hardly time to throw the towel over his lap before Craig walked in unannounced.

It was pretty obvious what was happening, if only from the images playing out on the TV. The strong scent of male arousal was in the air, and Alex’s pants lying down around his ankles pretty much completed the picture.

“Whoops,” Craig remarked flatly.

“Sorry, sorry,” Alex stammered, reaching for the DVD remote.

“No, no, leave it on,” Craig said wearily, slumping into the opposite chair. “I could use a little of that as well.”

Alex looked at him with a curious expression.

“I struck out, if that explains anything,” Craig said. “It doesn’t matter. Must be trying too hard. I don’t know.”

Craig obviously had had more than a little to drink as well. Alex wasn’t sure what to say, especially since he was still coming down from his sexual peak. This was terribly embarrassing, but thankfully Craig didn’t seem to want to make a big deal out of it. He was evidently too lost in his own private thoughts.

“We go through a lot to get that, don’t we,” Craig said after a time, pointing towards the naked woman on the TV. “Go through a lot of hoops.”

“I guess so,” Alex agreed. “But at least you’ve had it. At least you’ve had that experience.”

Craig looked over at him.

“You mean you’ve never…?”

“No, never,” Alex admitted. “Not even once.”

Craig nodded, not pushing the point. With the pornography still playing, Alex hadn’t made any move to replace his jeans, and despite himself was becoming hard again beneath the towel.

“This is getting a bit hard to watch, if you know what I mean,” Craig said, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

“Uh, yeah.”

“Oh, this is so stupid,” Craig finally exclaimed, undoing his belt buckle. “It’s not like I have anything you haven’t seen before, and I’ve already seen yours.”

So saying, Craig pulled off his slacks and briefs to expose his clearly excited erection. Alex tried to look not too directly, but it was hard not to be curious. Still, Craig was right; there was no real reason to be embarrassed. Hadn’t they already seen each naked on a few occasions passing in and out of the shower?

“I guess there’s no real harm in it,” Alex remarked. “After all, watching this stuff and not being able to do anything is worse than being at a strip show.”

“Heh, yeah, exactly,” Craig laughed.

In a casual way, the young blonde man had already grasped the end of his prick. He didn’t stroke it, but make subtle squeezing motions that allowed him to pleasure himself without overtly masturbating.

“What, um, was it like when you lost your virginity,” Alex asked. “I mean, what is it like to, you know… How does it feel? Inside?”

“Ah, it’s not all about the fucking,” Craig told him. “All the really good stuff is in the lead up. The kissing and the touching. There’s no body like the female body.”

“Yeah, I hear that,” Alex agreed. “I just wish it was all easier. I mean… I don’t know.”

“They have a lot of power over us,” Craig said. “Or at least, we give them that power. Think about all the stupid stuff we do to get laid.”

“Right. Who needs to pick up some easy tramp at a bar, when we can take care of ourselves here, and look for more mature relationships with women later on? As long as you’re thinking with your dick, you’re going to make mistakes. I say we take the power back.”

Craig looked over at him, a cloud of uncertainty covering his expression.

“I’m not sure I follow you,” he said. “You mean we should just, what, help each other out?”

The simplicity of the argument was, in current circumstances, unmistakably alluring. Head buzzing nicely from a few stiff beers, and cock hard and begging for attention, it became easy to contemplate the previously unthinkable.

“It’s not like a hugely taboo thing,” Alex reasoned. “I mean, it’s not as though either one of us will be bragging about it to anyone...”

“Yeah, that’s true enough,” Craig agreed. “And how different is it really from masturbating in the same room? We’re taking control of our sexuality, just as you say. Engaging in safe sexual practices in order to avoid making any foolish mistakes that trying to get laid can lead to.”

“How often do you hear the phrase ‘friends with privileges’,” Alex pointed out. “It’s not that unusual. Ok, well, it is kind of unusual, but the principal is sound. Besides, by Clinton’s definition, it isn’t even sex.”

“So, just to be clear, we are talking about the same thing, right,” Craig said. “We are going to, you know, give each other release.”

“Yeah, well, it’s not like anyone is ever going to know,” Alex quickly explained. “And at the end of the day, a hand is a hand, a mouth is a mouth. How much difference can there be?”

Craig looked at his roommate’s engorged and excited cock.

“You’ve never had a blow job before, have you?”

“Er, no, I haven’t,” Alex admitted.

“Alright. OK. I see. That’s cool,” Craig nodded. “You get down on the carpet there and strip down, and I’ll go get a bottle of scotch to prepare.”

The agreement, having been reached, was about to be enacted before either could regain the wits to think it through.

“Um, yeah. Can you turn off the lights while you’re at it,” Alex said, shrugging off his pants and socks. He laid himself out as instructed, putting the towel underneath him. He fixed his attention on the television, the only source of light in the room. His erection was still firm but losing strength from his rising nervousness. Perhaps this wasn’t such a great idea after all…

The moment he felt Craig’s warm fingers on his cock, Alex closed his eyes tight. It was the first time anyone had touched his sexually aroused organ. Swallowing hard, he allowed his roommate to stroke the length of his erection in a slow, repetitive motion. I was different than the way he normally did to himself, and that difference was actually very titillating. Craig, who held the bottle of scotch in his other hand, took a long swig and then bent down to take Alex’s cock within.

An erect penis definitely has no conscious, and is completely blind when it comes to the source of stimulation. The feeling of soft lips running along its length thrilled through him, and the gentle but insistent sucking created an intensely exciting feeling. Craig used his tongue along the underside of his glans, which throbbed with each excited heartbeat, and began to leak the characteristic pre-cum fluid.

Alex didn’t even think about who was doing this to him. Lost in the delirium of the moment, he felt his climax drawn out of him by the wet motion of lips, mouth and tongue. Saliva coated his intimate skin, and the occasional bump of teeth made for a sharp jolt amongst all this heady pleasure. It was unlike anything he’d ever experienced before. It was brilliant. He could imagine having his future girlfriends doing this to him every night. That would be heaven.

Trying not to cry out, Alex unconsciously raised his hips from the carpet as he felt the flow of semen boil from his testes. Craig managed to catch the cue, and lifted his mouth just in time to avoid the spurts of white cum that ejaculated from Alex’s wet member. It landed in thick gobs onto his bare chest, the messy result of the most intense orgasm of his young life. It took several moments just to come down and regain his breath. His tingling prick slowly softened back onto his loins in a wet sticky pool.

“That was OK?” Craig asked at last.

“It was brilliant,” Alex admitted, struggling to sit up. “I can’t believe it.”

“You think you’re up to, you know, returning the favor?”

“Oh, er, yes, of course,” Alex replied, suddenly embarrassed and ashamed. This had seemed like a much better deal when he was on the receiving end. Now he knew why the bottle of scotch was a necessary tool.

Craig stripped off all this clothes then sat down on the chair with his hips forward, knees apart. It was something of an obscene sight. His cock had become almost entirely flaccid. Alex shuffled forward uncertainly. In this position, Alex felt just a bit too submissive. It felt wrong.

“Um, listen. Do you think you can lie down on the carpet too? It would just be easier for me.”

“Alright, sure.”

The first step was to simply grasp that soft spongy organ between his fingers. He tried to put out of his mind that it was Craig’s penis, and thought of it as a kind of generic penis –an anatomical representation of one for him to experiment with. Depersonalizing the act made what he was doing so much easier. Squeezing it gently, he massaged the flaccid organ and watched it gradually harden in his hand.

Thankfully, Craig was circumcised as well. That his penis didn’t look so differently from Alex’s also made this endeavor less difficult. He was so used to the touch and texture of his own prick that it was a little surreal to go through these familiar motions and not get sensory feedback. Instead, all those thrilling sensations were being given to another.

Teasing the rounded tip of Craig’s glans, he realized that this wasn’t nearly as shocking or agonizing as he first expected. Holding the shaft firmly in one hand, he teased and explored the underside of Craig’s stiff prick, testing the smooth rounded surface of that squishy tube which lies just beneath the skin. Enclosing his fingers, he stroked Craig’s cock with renewed vigor, gathering up the nerve to take this to the next level.

Bending down, he closed his eyes and accepted the end of Craig’s warm cock just past his open lips. He rasped his tongue along the sensitive underside of his glans. Craig let out a low moan, which Alex tried to ignore. He curled his lips over his teeth and tried to take him deeper. He applied a diligent suction, breathing through his nose to avoid breaking contact. The angle was awkward though, so Alex shifted closer, bracing one arm across Craig’s lean hips for a more direct entry. With his free hand, he squeezed and make short stroking motions at the bottom end of his prick while continuing to lick and suck. It wasn’t all that terrible. The skin of the penis invading his mouth had kind of a nice taste in a strange way.

In his mind, he transposed himself, imagining that he was a woman, and that the cock he was sucking was actually his own. He thought about how this is what a woman experiences during oral sex, and the way he would like to be sucked off. Another breathless moan escaped Craig’s lips, momentarily shattering Alex’s illusion.

Eager to get this over with now, Alex sucked even harder, rocking his head up and down in a steady rhythm. He could feel Craig’s body beneath him going stiff. Because Alex hadn’t detected any pre-cum, he thought Craig was still a fair ways off from climax. He failed to realize how every person is subtly different in their sexual responses. When the first jets of salty hot semen exploded into Alex’s mouth, he nearly choked in surprise.

Alex recoiled as if he’d been shot. The rest of Craig’s ejaculate flowed over Alex’s fingers as he still held the shaft. He could literally feel each pulse shoot through, until at last it was over. Alex sat back with a mixture of wonder and horror in his expression.

Thankfully, there were no shared expressions of ‘that was great’ or anything else that might embarrass one or the other. Instead, they took their turns cleaning up in the bathroom and agreed to call it a night.

The morning after, as is often the case, can be the worst. But, as Alex roamed into the kitchen nursing his hangover, this is the way their conversation evolved.

Craig, who was already up and brewing coffee, nodded to his roommate in his typical manner of greeting.

“That was quite an evening,” Alex half-groaned. “If I’d stuck to the beers, I’d probably be alright, but that scotch is a killer.”

“Goes down nice though,” Craig grinned.

“I guess it wasn’t really the drinking that made last night so weird though, eh?”

Craig shrugged, clad only in his worn out plaid flannel shirt.

“I’m cool with it,” he said. “Why, what are you thinking?”

“Oh, no, no, you’re right,” Alex stammered. “No regrets here either. I mean it’s not like we did anything that freaky. It didn’t taste all that great at the end, but otherwise it was simple. Once you get past the homophobia thing, all we really did is prove the point that we can make the ‘friends with privileges’ thing work to our advantage.”

“Yeah, well, we both know the reason that it usually doesn’t work is because there’s a guy and a girl involved. If they’re having sex, they are going to be attracted to each other,” Craig explained. “With us, obviously that can’t happen because we aren’t gay. It’s just something we can do to relieve the pressure.”

Alex felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He was beginning to think what they did was a huge mistake, but Craig was obviously not going to make a big deal out of it, which meant Alex could relax as well. And he was right about the lack of any emotional consequences too. There’s no way he could be romantically attracted to another man.

“So, what about in future,” Alex said, taking the offered cup of coffee. “You think we should make this arrangement a formal and lasting agreement?”

“Yeah, that’s fine. How should we work it out?”

“Well, it would have to be an even exchange, but probably not on the same day,” Alex reasoned. “The way I see it, we can take turns being the ‘giver’ every other day. I figure we can do it just before we go to bed, but I think the ‘receiver’ can be able to ask before then if he feels like it. Does that sound OK?”

Craig nodded, “Sure.”

The decision was reached so simply that an outside observer would likely be amazed. But, what made this arrangement work is that there were no outsiders, no one to judge or mock them for engaging in what most would consider gay sex.

But, whether it is engaged with ties of emotion or not, sex always has consequences. Craig was able to go on, to meet and date women and eventually move in with one about a year later. Alex, on the other hand, whose sole sexual outlet had come from this experiment, drifted into the underground glory-hole scene. Whatever lesson, if any, is to be gleaned from the example of Craig and Alex, is that sexuality has a great deal many more shades of expression than is typically admitted to in common society.