Alex and Me

Alex and Me

Alex opened his front door. He stood there wearing gym shorts and a tank top, and said "Well, here I am," as if half-expecting me to be disappointed in his looks. On the contrary, it was instant hardon for me. I said I liked what I saw and stepped inside his house. As soon as the door was shut, we were all over each other. It was the start of what would keep us both busy seeing each other for the next eight months.

We met online and liked what we read in each other's profiles. Me married, him divorced, similar age, both carrying a few extra pounds, both very much into body contact, massage, kissing, exploring each other. No pics for either of us, but after chatting back and forth for a couple of weeks, we decided to meet.

My work schedule as a teacher limits my play time, and the only time I can regularly play is early morning before work. My wife was used to me being an early riser, but she had no idea that it was sometimes a sex detour before work that had me out the door extra early. Alex lived not too far from the school I worked at then, so it was a perfect arrangement.

That first time was spent exploring each other with hands and mouths, kissing, groping, massaging and caressing, finding the spots that made each other squirm and moan. We seemed to have a natural knowledge of each other, already knowing exactly where to suck, lick, rub, tweak, and massage. It was like our bodies were made for each other, and we seemed to instinctively know exactly what to do. After about thirty minutes of exploration, I went down on his dick in a serious sucking action, determined to pull his load out into my eager mouth. After the passionate body exploration we had been doing, I knew it wouldn't take him long to cum. When my hands felt the tightening of his balls, I knew I was about to receive the reward for my oral efforts. He started bucking his hips and began to squirt his load into my mouth. I found his taste to be absolutely delicious and held it on my tongue before I swallowed it down.

After he had recovered a few minutes, Alex pushed me back on his bed, kissed me deeply, tasting his semen, then kissed and licked down my chest and stomach until his mouth started working wonders on my dick. He licked up and down my shaft, swirled his tongue around the swollen head, and gently licked and sucked each one of my big balls. He sensed that I was about to explode, so he worked his way back up my cock just in time to have me start to shoot a huge load of creamy cum. He must have liked my taste as much as I liked his, since he began to moan appreciatively as he sucked the cum out of my dick and swallowed it all.

As we lay in bed, holding each other and gently stroking and caressing each other's bodies, he looked me straight in the eyes and said "Well, what do you think? Do you want to meet again?"

"Hell yes, you sexy man!" I said. I cleaned up and got dressed again. We set up another meeting for the following week and after another passionate kiss, I was out the door and off to school.

~~~~~~~~~~

The next meet was almost a repeat of the first one, with the kind of passionate, full body exploration I love so much. As we again lay in bed, savoring the aftertaste of each other's cum, and kissing and sharing that wonderful flavor, we again realized that we seemed to be a natural fit with each other, and we decided that we were going to make this as much of a regular thing as our lives would allow. And so, we began what we both expected would be a series of regular meetings for mutual sexual satisfaction. And it was that, but during our third session together, something happened that turned it into much more.

That third time that I played with Alex, it became something more than play. We were in his bed, kissing, groping, sucking, and then something clicked in my brain: I was falling for him, falling really hard, feeling something stir in me that I hadn't felt for a long time. And then I realized that from the way he was looking into my eyes, he was feeling the same towards me. He stared at me for a few moments, and then said, "Rob, I want you to fuck me. Now. Bare. Fill me. I want to feel you inside me."

Now, part of my mind said, What the hell are you doing? But my heart (and my dick) said, Fuck him, fill him, bond with him. And so, I spit in my hand and began to work one finger, then, two, then three, into his waiting ass, stretching and opening him for my big dick. All the while we were looking into each other's eyes, as if to reassure each other that we were both feeling the same passion and desire for each other, the connection that was more than a meeting of two bodies.

I was finally ready to enter Alex, and I slowly slid my cock head into his warm and inviting ass. Feeling him adjust to my girth, I gradually slid into him, experiencing that wonderful sensation of our union, my dick buried in Alex, our eyes still locked on each other's faces. He reached up to my neck and pulled me down to his face, kissing me with a passion that aroused me to fucking frenzy. I kissed him for all I was worth, pounding his butt, and feeling the tension build in my full balls, ready to release my sperm into Alex, to leave a part of me with him.

Finally, I broke our kiss and began panting and moaning, almost shouting my ecstasy as I release my cum into my lover. I kept pumping until I could hardly move, then I collapsed on top of Alex, realizing from the warm liquid between our bellies and chests, that he had cum without touching himself, almost simultaneously with my orgasm. We lay there, drenched in sweat and cum, kissing, caressing, stroking each other's face and hair. Then, without even thinking what I was saying, I whispered, "Alex, I love you." He first seemed surprised at my admission, but then his face lit up and he replied, "Rob, I love you too. What are we going to do?"

We showered together, I got dressed, and as I was walking towards his front door (on rather wobbly legs), he took my hand and pulled me in for another passionate kiss, and we said goodbye for the time being, with no commitment for another meeting.

I was fairly worthless at work that day, and the next few, as I was trying to sort out my feelings for Alex. I loved my wife and sons, and I could not possibly give up the life we had together. But Alex had brought back into my life a spark, a passion that I hadn't felt for a long, long time. I knew I had to be with him again, to not just have sex, but to make love, to explore this new situation and see where it took me. Alex and I emailed back and forth for a few days, without mentioning our feelings for each other. But finally, I had to see him again and figure out what to do. We agreed to meet again the following week, and I decided that if that passion and desire, that love, was still there, I had to do something about it.

I was determined to find out how I really felt about Alex. There was something about him that really connected with me, that seemed to fill a hole in my heart, an empty space in my life. I found I needed that male connection that had always eluded me. All my life I had seemed to be missing a part of me that had never connected with any males in my life: father, brothers, male relatives, role models, anyone, and I felt alone as a man. My sexual experiences with other men were a hell of a lot of fun, but the personal side never was fulfilled. A fuck or suck buddy was great, but I needed something more in my life.

~~~~~~~~~~

Alex and I met again the following week, and I told him I wanted him to fuck me. I wanted to feel him in me, I wanted to carry his seed with me during the workday. I had rarely been fucked, but there was a burning desire to bond this way with Alex. We fell into his bed, passionately kissing and caressing, feeling our bodies merge into one. I lay on my stomach and Alex climbed on top of me, working my asshole open with tender hands. First one, then two, then three fingers, stretching me, massaging my prostate, loosening me up for his dick. Finally, he positioned himself and began to insert his cock into my ass. There was no pain, only some discomfort, which soon vanished as he began to move in and out of me. A warm feeling of being filled with Alex took over, and I began to push myself onto his cock. We fell into a rhythm that built up speed and passion.

I told him to stop and let me turn over. I said, "Alex, I want to see your face when you cum." He pulled out and I positioned myself on my back and pulled my legs up, spreading myself open for him to enter me again. As I felt his dick slip into me without so much as a twinge of pain, I felt merged with Alex, connected with him in a way that was more than his cock in my ass. There was a feeling of tenderness as he fucked me. He was genuinely concerned that I enjoyed the fuck, not just concentrating on his pleasure. I reached around and grabbed his butt and pulled him into me, all the while looking into his eyes and seeing a warmth shining in them as he fucked me.

Our rhythm became faster and faster, and I could see the orgasm building in Alex. He began to groan with pleasure as his balls began to pull up and send waves of electricity through his body. He shouted out in ecstasy and unleashed his load of semen into me. I could feel the warmth of his cum in my ass, and giving my cock one or two strokes was all it took to push me over the edge as I began to spurt my cum all over my belly and chest. Alex collapsed on top of me, and our mouths met in a passionate kiss. It was then that I knew that I loved Alex, and that he also loved me. This was the man to man connection I had been seeking, and I began to find that the hole in my heart was being filled, just as my body had been filled by Alex.

As we lay next to each other in the after-orgasm glow of pleasure and relaxation, I shared with Alex that I had always been afraid of being fucked, especially since I had been sodomized by my two brothers when I was a boy. He stared at me and said, "Rob, I can't believe you just let me fuck you! How can you allow a man to put his cock in you after what had happened to you?"

I said, "Alex, this is so different. They treated me with violence and left an emotional scar. Your filling me with such love, tenderness, and passion, and a real concern for my own pleasure, has gone a long way to erasing that scar. I know that you filled me with your dick out of desire and love for me, not just seeking to enjoy yourself at my expense." He said he understood, and that I was right, he did love me and cared for me. I knew then that I had been right about him, that it was more than lust at first sight.

~~~~~~~~~~

Over the next several months, we met and had sex many times, and we had more than sex. I knew I had a problem on my hands, and that I would have to make some big decisions about how far Alex and I were going to take our relationship. I couldn't give up my marriage and family, but I now found that I couldn't give up Alex, either. What was I going to do?

Alex gave me a key to his house and said that any time I was in the area and just wanted a place to relax, even if he wasn't home, I was welcome. And I did use that key many times, sometimes when he wasn't home, but mostly to slip in quietly in the early morning hours. I would always find him ready and eager for more lovemaking, and he often had little surprises in how and where I found him waiting for me.

~~~~~~~~~~

I discovered that Alex had a playful streak in him. The pattern we fell into was that I would arrive at his house in the early morning hours, use the key he had given me to enter through the front door, strip in the front living room, and then go back to his bedroom to make love. There were often surprises.

Once, I entered his bedroom to find him lying naked on the bed with a blindfold on, half hard, and with one hand on his dick and the other stretched out, palm up. I think he expected me to come up to him and put my dick or balls in his hand, but what I did was kneel down beside the bed and begin to kiss his hand, working my way up his arm, to his nipples, his throat, and then to his lips, parted in a sweet smile at my loving attention. That ended up in a slow, passionate lovemaking session that left me glowing, inside and out, for the rest of the day.

Another time, I entered his bedroom to find him wearing nothing but a cowboy hat and boots. In celebration of Houston Rodeo, we spent a couple of wild hours riding each other, a couple of bucking, fucking broncos. That session was pretty noisy, and I hope his neighbors didn't get an earful. I remember putting on his boots and hat and riding him for all I was worth, finally spraying my cum all over his chest and face while he emptied his balls into my ass. My ass was sore (in a good kind of way) the rest of the day, but I hope my smug smile didn't arouse any suspicion at work.

Another time, I walked into his bedroom, only to find it empty. I called his name and heard "In here, Rob" from down the hall. I followed the sound of his voice and found him in the bathroom, taking a hot bath by candlelight. I leaned over the tub and kissed him deeply and passionately, and then proceeded to give him a relaxing bath. I soaped him up and used the suds and water to explore every inch of him. I'm a sucker for a good massage and lots of body contact and exploration, so I knew what he was feeling as I attended to every part of his body.

I think we men sometimes forget that the entire body is an erogenous zone, and that our best sexual attention doesn't necessarily come from our dicks. That bath was one of the most erotic experiences I've ever had, and I wasn't on the receiving end of it. Touching, caressing, stroking, massaging, even a playful pinch or tweak now and then, I found myself rock hard and ready to cum, and neither he nor I had even touched my dick. When Alex got out of the tub, I took a soft bath towel and gently dried him off, kissing him all over. I then took his hand and led him to his bedroom. We made love to each other, our bodies intertwined, and by the time we were done, we both needed a shower, as we were covered in sweat and cum.

The first time Alex and I showered together was the first time I had ever showered with another man. It was a memorable experience. I loved the way he soaped me up and ministered to my entire body. I remember the electric shock as he slipped his hand between my ass cheeks and started washing my ass hole. He made washing up into a sex game, seeing how far he could push me by hitting all the right spots, then slowing down and making me wait. I had never been edged by another man before, and that shower together showed me what I had been missing.

By the time he had me squeaky clean, I was practically begging him to have mercy and suck me off. He did so, but only prolonged the beautiful agony by sucking my dick, licking my balls, teasing me with his tongue and hands, playing with my ass hole, and finally taking me all the way down (the first time he had deep-throated me) until I exploded in his mouth, shouting and groaning.

Then the big surprise: I was leaning against the shower wall to keep from falling down, I was so weak-kneed after my orgasm. Alex stood up and planted a big juicy kiss on my lips, so I opened my mouth to kiss him and found to my surprise (and a bit of shock) that he was feeding me my own semen. I had never even heard the term snowballing, and it was actually the first time I had ever tasted my own cum. I was so aroused by it that I was instantly hard again and passionately returned his kiss as we passed my cum back and forth between us. I then dropped to my knees and sucked him like a starving man, grabbing his ass and pulling him into my mouth. As his balls began to tighten, he bucked his hips forward a couple of times, and yelled out "I'm cumming, Rob!" and began to coat the insides of my mouth with his sweet tasting cum. I didn't swallow it down but stood up and kissed him and passed his cum into his open mouth. I had never experienced this before, but I found this sharing of our cum to be one of the most intimate and erotic things I had ever done.

One time we shared together wasn't explicitly sexual, but it is still one of my favorite memories of Alex. I had managed a free evening away from my family, and Alex asked me what I would like for dinner. I said, "Surprise me. I'll be there at 6 pm." When I came into the house, he was in the kitchen, standing naked in front of the stove, cooking up a delicious pasta and mushroom dish. I was soon naked too, and we sat down to a wonderful meal, chatting across the table, occasionally touching and caressing each other's hands, even indulging in a bit of silly but sensuous foot play under the table.

After the dinner, we went into his living room, turned on the TV to some movie or other. Then I lay back on the sofa, and Alex lay down between my legs and leaned back against my chest. We watched and enjoyed the movie, lightly caressing each other and connecting in a new way. I would reach around and rest my hand on his chest, giving little strokes and rubbing his nipples. He would rub his hand up and down my leg, sometimes almost ticking me, sometimes giving me a firm squeeze, sometimes gently stroking my thigh. He would also turn his head and look up into my eyes, then I would lean forward and kiss him, and we would then return our attention to the movie. We didn't "have sex" that evening, but it was some of the best bonding we had ever had, and it is still burned into my memory. I don't remember what the movie was, but I can still feel Alex leaning into my chest, the feel of his heartbeat and I rested my hand on his chest, the feel of his gentle touch on my legs, and especially the warm kisses we shared.

~~~~~~~~~~

It is sad to realize that this came to an end. Perhaps it was inevitable, but as our passion for each other grew and deepened, I began to wonder how far I could take this. I was married to a woman I still loved, and I had two great sons who needed me, who needed a mom and a dad together. Finally, I came to the conclusion that I had to choose.

I think Alex knew what was coming, and he helped me along by implying one day that he wanted me to think about moving in with him. Looking back on it now, I think Alex was forcing me to look at reality, to let him go and be there for my family. I found that I could put my feelings on paper and write what I found impossible to say. I wrote down what he had meant to me, that the "hole in my heart" had been filled and healed.

I know this because I realized that I carried away a bit of Alex in my heart, and to this day, after 33 years of marriage and a full and satisfying life, I still think about Alex now and then. I remember the way he made me feel, and I remember the joy of realizing that he also loved me in return. The sex was beyond great, it was life changing. And when I think of Alex, my dick usually gets hard, but I always smile.

Alex, thank you for being a wonderful man, thank you for letting me go, and thank you for staying in my mind and heart to this day. I still love you, and I will always have a special place in my heart and memory for you.