Staring down at my feet, shielding my face from the heavy rain thundering on the fur hood of my coat covering me, yet not nearly enough from the wild weather here in Ireland, I power through the dark wet leaves on cobbled footpaths focused on the music that filled my mind. Hands in pockets, earphones in barely visible from the scarf around my neck preventing chills from trailing down my spine.
Suddenly, a car speeds by with such force next to me as the streetlamps cascade just enough light to see maybe two feet in front of me in the almost pitch darkness of the evening. I gasp in shock as if someone had deliberately thrown a bucket of ice over me, no it was simply that a passing car crashed through a deep puddle that I so happened to be right next to.
"Damn these narrow roads, what is he going to think of me turning up wet through?"
I make a few failed attempts at squeezing out some of the water that's drenched my left side facing the road and that's when I realise my leggings, shoes and socks are soaked as well. I'm more worried about my wheelchair, water and electrics don't mix as I've discovered a few times in the past. As I continued to gravitate straight ahead along the narrow footpath with naked winter trees wafting furiously as the wind picked up, I knew I had to make a decision. Turn back home and text my best friend to say I'm not coming, making up some story how I'm not well or something to that effect, which I would feel incredibly guilty about for days as I hate lying or turn up at his front door, piss wet through and feeling like an absolute prat in front of a guy I really,
really
like! A guy that gives me butterflies just with words on a screen, weak at the knees when he puts on his charm and has me laughing so hard it makes me wonder whether I actually, ever truly laughed before because he raises the bar that high. My mind wonders to past conversations and times spent together and it makes me smile, reminiscing taking my mind completely off how cold I was and partially numb where the water seeped through to my skin.
My phone pinged and I knew it was him. I desperately wanted to check but I didn't want to test how waterproof my android apparently was by pulling it out in this wicked weather. That's when it dawned on me that I hadn't actually made a decision... Now it was too late, I'd totally zoned out and here I was now in front of his house
. "Shit!.. Shit! Shit!"
I couldn't see any lights on so there was still a chance I could turn around and pretend I didn't make it. I didn't want Shane to see me a mess, but at the same time I'd been looking forward to movie night with him all week long.
And just like that the decision was made for me...
The front door of the quaint little cottage swung open without any warning and because I'd stupidly still had my earphones in I hadn't been paying attention to sounds inside the house that would of given me some indication I was close to having a door collide with my face.
"What on earth are yeh doing out here? Get in it's pissing it down!" came a voice from the tall dark Shane shaped silhouette with the hall light surrounding him from the now wide-open door.
I immediately yanked my earphones out, put my hood down and smiled shyly at him, caught his gaze, having to look away quickly before I fall... pretending to brush down the sopping wet coat that weighed a ton hanging from my body.
"Sorry I'm late, it's a bit wet out here," I grin with sarcasm. He took my hand and pulled me into his house and closed the door behind me, being sure to lock it.
Conscious of not tracking wet wheels all over Shane's house, I roll back and forth several times on the large door mat, like a non-disabled person would do with their feet upon entering. The heating was on to my relief, as that'd help dry them also.
I lean down immediately to stroke Freddie who had come rushing to see who had arrived at his house this late. I fussed him, scratching behind his ears and rubbed his back as he spun around and zigzagged with excitement.
"Okay, c'mon enough with the dog you'll get him all riled up and he won't let us watch the film..."
"Haha. Alright... Where should I put my coat?" I muster sheepishly.
He looked me up and down, "looks like you need to take more than yeh coat off dear by the looks of yeh..."
"Cheeky..." I caught his eye and he grinned back at me the way he always does when there's an opportunity to turn something innocent into something a bit more. I whipped my coat off slowly and handed it to Shane while I yanked on my leggings to pull each foot up within reach to continue to remove my shoes and socks, carefully placing my socks inside my shoes and tucking them under the hall radiator, feeling the warmth of it as I did so. It felt so good after being out in the wind and rain.
Shane tucked my coat on the same radiator and was looking at me inquisitively. I was confused.
Had I missed something?
"Ha, what is it?" I laugh awkwardly.
"You er... should take those leggings off before yeh catch a cold yeh know..." he reached his hand behind his neck slightly uncomfortable but obviously wanting to come across caring.
"I haven't brought any change of clothes, I kind of wasn't expecting to swim here the forecast said partly cloudy skies tonight not gail force winds and torrential rain!" I tried to make light though I was somewhat embarrassed.
"I know!... Be right back," Shane said before he took off like a shot, leaving me sat in the hall in bare feet.
Then I heard a distant shout, "come in the living room, I've got yeh something..."
I made my way slowly through to the living room where I saw Shane had already set up a blanket on the sofa and snacks on the coffee table. My heart swelled with how much thought he'd put in and cosey it felt from the first glance. Our chosen film paused at the beginning on his TV. A lamp was on in the corner, the main light off. For some reason, I suddenly felt at home. My mind wondered to how much time he must have put aside to set the scene, just for a film night, but gosh did I want to just squeeze him tight and kiss his cheek in appreciation because he's amazing at stuff like this.
Shane handed me a folded up garment, "here slip into this, there's a towel in the bathroom to dry yeh legs and then all will be grand."
"Thanks, I appreciate it," I said meeting his gaze and trying not too long or risk falling into the danger zone. So I moved then, making my way to the bathroom to sort myself out.
Once in the bathroom, I stripped my leggings off and wrung them out in the sink before placing it in my black mini leather backpack I carried everywhere with me. Finding the towel hanging on the rail next and drying my legs from the thighs down.
Next, I unfolded what Shane had provided for me and it was then I realised it was just a long baggy t-shirt. The sort of thing I sleep in at night.
Did he know that? Or was this merely all he could muster up in this situation?
I decided I was reading too much into why and whipped off my top... leaving my black lace bra and knickers beneath. I wouldn't usually wear a bra with this sort of thing but I wasn't at mine. I was with this guy,
this amazing guy
. I needed that barrier in case he got too close my breasts are quick to react to brushing of clothing or accidental nudges, it doesn't take a lot to unintentionally make my nipples erect. Pulling the t-shirt over my head and letting it flow down, it smelled like him and God did it ignite that familiar delicious ache in my lower belly. It came to just above mid-thigh. I tried to yank it down more, being rather modest but it wouldn't give any more coverage. I caught sight of my reflection in the mirror and immediately I thought I looked like something out a rom-com. After a passionate love making session where the girl grabs the guys shirt and wears it the morning after. My long brunette hair, flowing over my shoulders somewhat dishevelled through being weather beaten despite the hood of my coat, some parts were wet so I used the towel to take out some moisture.
"What are yeh doing in there? C'mon let's watch the film, or else we ain't getting much sleep tonight." Another intriguing innuendo to add to the list. He's always so quick and gets your thoughts all muddled.
Opening the bathroom door I slipped through quietly and through to the dimly lit living room where Shane sat on the sofa fiddling with the T.V remote. I was shivery and was suddenly washed away with dirty thoughts of Shane warming me up. He looked up and towards me, there was an awkward pause where I felt rather exposed. Wanting to shy away in a knee-jerk reaction but at the same time curious as to what would happen if I simply went with it.
I need to gather myself and stay cool
, I told myself.
I inched forwards and next to the sofa where he sat. Shane scooted over more to give me room and shifted the coffee table some so I could get as close to the sofa as need be for a quick transfer. I came level with the sofa, lifted the opposite armrest of the wheelchair controls, braced one arm on the armrest of my chair and the other fist with a straight arm into the firm sofa to provide stability as I moved across. I'm really aware that the t-shirt is riding up more as I inch myself onto the sofa but with no hands left, there wasn't much to do about it other than blush. Shane watches this manoeuvre curiously and with concern on his face. I know he sees my arms are shaking due to weakness so I smile at him trying to be reassuring. This is my normal, and he's still getting used to it.
Finally on the sofa, Shane grabs the controller and drives my wheelchair back out the way of us, sits back down next to me and scoots the coffee table back into position.
"That's better," he says now that the tedious part was over.
I bring my knees up to my chest because my bare legs dangling puts strain on them. My feet didn't reach the floor, an issue I have quite a bit with being a short arse. I follow this up by just laying them bent comfortably sideways up on the sofa. Grabbing a firm sofa cushion and propping it between us and resting my elbow on it so I could relax.
