It was 9:00 in the morning and already it was scorching hot outside so I called my girlfriend Rachel to see if she wanted to hang out at her pool today. She lives in a house that overlooks Mission Bay here in San Diego and it's got an amazing pool in the backyard.
"What do you mean you're not home?" I asked as I popped a coffee pod into my Starbucks Versimo machine and pushed the brew button. "It's hot as hell out and I wanted to come over and swim."
"I told you the other day that Janie, Kristy and I are going wine tasting and then to a spa today," Rachel replied.
"Oh yeah, I forgot," I grumbled. "Well crap, that sucks."
"You know you can go by yourself over if you want, Matt. Sean and Derrick are probably getting ready to head out for brunch but I can text them and have them leave the gate open for you."
"Are you sure?" Sean and Derrick are Rachel's roommates - they're an older gay couple we like to call 'The Two Dads' - and it's actually their house.
"Absolutely," she insisted. "They love you, especially the way you flirt with them."
"What?" I practically spit out the coffee I just drank. "I don't flirt!"
"The hell you don't," she said with a loud laugh. "The last time you were over... the shit you guys were saying to each other and the way you kept waggling your ass at them-"
"Shut up!" I interrupted. "I didn't! I was drinking! They don't think I'm gay, do they?"
"Of course not," she said, then quickly amended: "Well, I don't know. I don't think so."
"Great." Now I was worried.
"If you're not gay, what do you care what they think?"
"What do you mean if?" If? The hell? Did my own girlfriend think-
"—you know what I mean," she was saying, cutting into my thoughts, her tone placating.
"I'm not gay!" I insisted.
"Whatever," she sighed. "I know they think you're hot, though."
"Ew, they're so old," I laughed.
"They're not old! Derrick's 46 and Sean just turned 44."
"Like I said! That's like... 20 years older than me."
"You're so bad, Matt," she giggled. "But they like what they see."
"Of course they do. What's not to like?"
"You should wear those new trunks you got when we went to Del Mar last week."
"Really? You don't think that's going a little far?"
"Are you kidding me? They'll love it."
"I don't know," I hedged. "I don't want them to jump my bones or anything."
"You can't rape the willing-"
"What?!"
"I'm kidding," she laughed. "Look, I have to go. Maybe I'll see you later if you're still at the house."
She hung up and I stared at my phone until the screen went black, thinking about what she said. She couldn't seriously think I was... I mean... What the fuck?! Sean, Derrick and I joke around a lot but that doesn't mean anything. I like to give them shit about pretty much everything and they give as good as they get. In fact, I still blush when I think of some of the risque and raunchy comments they made the last time I was over. Oh yeah, payback's gonna be a bitch.
I found the trunks Rachel was talking about. The black and tan checkered box-cut trunks are the smallest and tightest swimsuit I've ever owned - you'll never catch me in a Speedo - and the perfect thing to tease Derrick and Sean with.
I grabbed my favorite black tank top and then rummaged through my drawers to find something to change into afterwards, settling on brown shorts from Topman that I knew would look great with my tan. They were also snug enough to keep the Dads happy. Now for underwear.
Unless I'm at the beach or going swimming, I never go commando. It's just gross. I pulled open my underwear drawer and considered my options. I stick to briefs and trunks. No boxers and definitely no thongs. I spied the stack of my white Tommy Hilfiger briefs and smiled. Yeah, perfect. The Dads will drool when they see the logo over the waistband of my shorts. I tossed them into my bag with the rest of my clothes.
I grabbed what I needed from my bathroom and took a look at myself in the mirror. My thick light brown hair was on point today and my brown eyes looked almost gold. The black tank top was just tight enough to show off how much time I spend at the gym.
*~*~*~*
I got to Rachel's house a little after 10:00, a 12-pack of IPA from Stone Brewery in tow. Sure enough, the gate was unlocked and there was a note taped to the French doors going into the family room:
"Matt - The door's unlocked so make yourself at home. We'll be back early this afternoon. The security cameras are on so feel free to sunbathe in the buff. But use plenty of sunscreen."
I rolled my eyes and laughed as I set my bag down on the couch. They had a huge outdoor living space, complete with a kitchen, bar, and patio furniture that was more comfortable than the stuff I had in my apartment. I opened a beer, put the rest into the fridge under the bar, and stripped off my tank. I flopped onto a chaise and put in my AirPods.
I spent the next couple of hours swimming, sunning myself and drinking. I also made use of the Bowflex and Elliptical they had in one of the spare rooms.
Shortly after one-o'clock I heard the rumble of the garage door.
"Hey Matt," Sean called a minute later. He was opening the sliding glass door and coming outside with two other guys. "This is Michael and Rod."
I waved and figured it was about time to leave, what with company here.
Derrick joined them as I got out of the pool, making sure I made a production of toweling off. It looked like they were going to barbeque. "I'll get out of your way," I said as I drained my beer and tossed the empty into the recyclable container.
"You went through seven already?" Derrick asked, peering into the bin.
"Yup, you can't drink all day if you don't start first thing in the morning."
"You're not leaving on our account, are you?" Michael asked, looking to Sean and Derrick.
"No, of course he's not," Derrick said as he and Rod walked back inside. He called over his shoulder, "Stay, please. There's plenty. Besides, you probably shouldn't be driving, so at least eat something."
"It's only beer," I yelled back. "I can drink beer all day long."
"We brought edibles," Rod announced in a sing-song voice as he came back outside a few moments later, holding up a tray full of cookies and brownies.
Sean turned to me. "That's mari-"
"I know what they are," I said, cutting him off. Ever since California legalized marijuana, the edibles industry has boomed.
"Oh that's right," Sean laughed, elbowing me. "I forget how much you like your brownies."
"Ass," I muttered, hip-checking him while I reached out to shake Michael and Rod's hands. "I'm Matt," I said in greeting. "Nice to meet ya. I'm just gonna grab a quick shower and I'll be back out in a few."
"No need to stop swimming, Matt," Derrick said, coming back outside. He set down a platter of thick steaks and a few Tupperware containers. I caught him looking me up and down.
"I know," I said, slinging the towel over my shoulder. "Maybe I'll go back in after I eat."
I heard hushed voices and could feel four sets of eyes riveted to my ass as I walked inside. I dropped my towel and heard a collective gasp when I slowly bent over to pick it up. I smirked. Rachel was right. The dirty old pervs were totally eating it up.
I took a long piss - so many beers - and then showered quickly. While I was drying off I realized I'd forgotten my change of clothes outside so, with the towel wrapped low around my hips, I ran back to the patio.
"Forgot my clothes," I announced as I stepped outside and grabbed my bag.
"You look fine from where I'm standing," Sean observed.
"I know," I winked as I slid by, "but I don't wanna catch cold."
Back in the bathroom, I pulled my underwear on and stopped for a few seconds to admire the way it made my ass and package look, cupping my nuts and giving them a quick, tight squeeze. I then blew my hair dry, using some of the gel and hairspray I kept here in the cabinet. I slipped on the Topmans and dug for my shirt. "Shit," I muttered, realizing I'd left it on the chaise.
Without bothering to zip up or even button, I went back outside to get my shirt. I thought Sean was going to have a seizure or something the way his eye bugged out when he saw me. I smirked at him on my way back inside.
I buttoned and zipped and then adjusted the shorts so the Tommy Hilfiger logo on my briefs was showing above the waistband of the shorts. I contemplated whether or not to wear the tank top as I straightened up the bathroom, finally deciding against it. I tucked it into my back pocket instead and went back to join the guys. I was starting to feel a little buzz from all the beers by now.
I felt like all eyes were on me when I stepped out onto the patio and Sean said, "You made that extra trip to get your shirt and now you're not gonna wear it?"
I pulled the tank from my back pocket. "If you want me to cover up, I'll-"
"No!" the guys chorused together and I laughed as I tossed the shirt onto an empty chair.
Michael was behind the bar mixing up a pitcher of margaritas and he slid one my way along with a shot of tequila. "Just in time," he said.
"Thank you," I replied. I waited until the rest of the guys had their margaritas and shots and then raised mine in a toast and downed it.
The tequila was good. Really good and really smooth and it went down really easy. A second shot followed and went down just as easily.
The margarita was nice and strong, the perfect complement to the chips and guacamole that Rod made tableside for us. "There's nothing better than freshly made guac," I commented as I scooped some onto a chip and shoved it into my mouth. The others agreed.
We sat at the large stone table when the rib-eyes were done and I was finishing my steak when Sean refilled my margarita from the new pitcher Michael just made. I couldn't remember if this was my second or third. I tried to pass on another shot but Sean wasn't having any of it.
"You a light weight or something now?" Derrick teased from across the table. This could get dangerous. My liquor of choice is whiskey. I can sip a good whiskey all night long and be fine the next day. But tequila? I've joked with friends that tequila has a 'roofie' effect on me, which is exactly why I don't do tequila shots. Margaritas are fine, but shots? Not a good idea.
"Screw you, old man," I scowled as I flipped him the bird. He laughed as I reluctantly drank the shot and then reached for a cookie. They were small, and from what Rod had said, not as potent as edibles normally are. I finished it in one bite and reached for another.
"Easy there, Matt," Derrick cautioned.
"Yes, Grandpa," I mocked.
