Grace tugged at the strap of her black singlet and sighed. She'd spent so long thinking about this moment, she couldn't believe she was actually going through with it today. Her knuckles rapped against the door, and she took a step back. Her heart was thudding so loud the beats pounded in her ears.
While she waited for the sound of footsteps, she smoothed her hands over her denim skirt and turned to gaze at the street behind her. Sunlight bounced off the windshield of her parked car, a dog barked in the distance, the smell of a barbecue wafted on the wind. Just a typical Sunday for most people, but not for her.
Grace shoved her blonde hair back from her face and told herself to keep it together. She flattened her palm against her stomach, closed her eyes and concentrated on deep breaths. With each second that ticked by, she considered the wisdom of running away and pretending this had never happened.
It was a stupid idea anyway--really stupid. Grace opened her eyes and took a step towards the edge of the porch. She bit her lip and hesitated, the pull to disappear just as strong as the urge to stay.
Her stomach dipped as the door swung open at her back.
"Disgrace, what brings you here?"
Grace summoned the courage to turn and look into the blue eyes of Tom Jackson, her best friend Alison's older brother. The rumpled state of his coffee-coloured hair gave the impression he'd just climbed out of bed--at two in the afternoon.
His muscled arm rested on the door frame above his head, and the breeze caressed the dark hairs sprinkled across his chest. He wore black boxer briefs and nothing else. No matter how long she stood here, Grace knew she'd never tire of looking at him.
She sighed inwardly at his ability to always ruin the moment by speaking. "It's Grace, Tom. It's always been Grace."
He'd given her the annoying nickname back when she was a teenager, and he'd unfortunately never been able to let it go. She elbowed her way past him and stalked into the house.
Grace dropped her purse and keys onto the hall table and turned to take in the living room. Her hazel eyes swept over the coffee table littered with wine glasses and empty beer cans, the beige couch with a pair of jeans draped over the back. She knew Tom had invited his family over last night to celebrate his recent promotion at work. Being a family of seven, their nights often turned into rowdy ones.
The door clicked closed behind her, and Grace flinched at the finality of the sound. She paced the wooden floorboards and nibbled her thumbnail, then yanked her hand away when she remembered she'd given up the habit years ago.
"Gracie, stop for a minute." Tom snagged her elbow and turned her toward him. "What's going on? Is something wrong with Alison?"
"No. What?" Grace blinked. "No. She's fine. There's nothing wrong with her."
Tom released his hold on her. "Why are you here then? You never come by without her."
"I had to see you on my own. You can't... please don't tell her about this." Grace covered her face with her hands. She massaged her forehead and took a couple of fortifying breaths. Was she really going to do this? "I have a question to ask you."
"Must be a good one. You can't even look at me."
Grace forced her hands away and met his eyes. He'd moved over to the couch and sat on the edge with his hands dangling between his knees. His watchful eyes followed her every movement.
She huffed out a breath. "I'm just going to come out with it, okay?"
"That's usually the best way." He waggled his thumb at the empty space beside him. "Do you want to take a seat? You look like you're about to pass out."
Grace shook her head. "No, I'm fine. I just really need to say this." Her heart hammered, and the pressure built inside her until the idea of telling him almost became appealing. "Tom... I'm a virgin."
He leaned back against the couch and clasped his hands behind his head. Amusement glimmered in his eyes, and a lazy smile played about his lips. "With your uptight, highly-strung personality, I'd never have guessed."
A flush warmed her cheeks as the urge to run gained strength. "I knew you'd react this way."
"Then why did you tell me?" He kept his eyes on her.
It took some effort, but Grace managed to push her embarrassment aside and approach the coffee table. She shoved a couple of empty beer cans out of the away and perched on the edge facing him. "We've known each other a long time. I've been thinking a lot lately about--"
"Stop stalling." He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. He stroked her leg with his fingertips. "Out with it."
Grace blew the hair from her eyes and glanced down at her hands. "The thing is, Tom..."
"Yes, Gracie."
"I want you to take my virginity."
The sudden silence weighed heavily in the room. Grace held her breath and trained her attention on her fingernails. Now it was out there, there was no taking it back. Ever. She waited for him to laugh, to ridicule her, but nothing happened.
"You're not saying anything." She glanced up and saw his guarded expression. "Why aren't you saying anything?"
"Jesus, I'm in shock." Tom dragged a hand down his face. "You can't just throw it out there like that."
"You told me to!" She pressed her lips together and focused on staying calm. "I just want to get it out of the way. I'm twenty-three years old. I'm sick of having this hanging over my head."
His eyes passed over her. "I'm sure you could find plenty of men willing to help you out with your 'problem'."
"I don't want just any man." Grace chewed her lower lip. She closed her eyes and held her breath for a moment. When her gaze met his again, she found some of her courage had returned. "I want you."
Tom cleared his throat and shifted in his seat. "Why?"
"I want my first time to be amazing." She saw the heat flare in his eyes, and it gave her hope. "I know with you it will be."
"I'd ask if you were serious, but in all the time I've known you I've never heard you crack a single joke."
Grace slapped her palms on her knees and pushed herself up to stand. "I knew it was a risk asking you a question like this. I half expected you to say no." She stepped over his bare feet and forced her shoulders back. "Forget it. I was an idiot to even ask."
Tom gripped her wrist as she passed by, tugging firmly enough to bring her back a step. "I didn't say I wouldn't do it."
Her breath caught, but she told herself not to get too excited yet. "You'll help me out?"
"Yeah, it'll be a real chore. I'd like to say I'm the type of guy who wouldn't take advantage of a woman in your situation, but who would I be kidding?" He fought a losing battle to keep the smile off his face. "I can't believe my life has come to this."
Grace yanked her wrist free from his grasp and scowled at him. "This is one of the reasons I chose you; your ability to have sex and move on as if nothing happened-- also because you annoy me enough I'm not likely to develop any feelings for you."
Tom stood and flicked his fingertip down her nose. "You underestimate my appeal, Gracie." He propped his hands at his waist and looked her over. "So, are we doing this now, or did you come here to make an appointment?"
She raised her eyes to the ceiling and blew out a loud breath. "I'm beginning to wonder why I came here at all."
Tom laughed and gave her upper arm a quick rub. "Why don't we just get it over with?" He intertwined his fingers with hers and pulled gently.
Despite her better judgment, Grace gave in and followed behind him.
~ * ~
She discovered his bedroom was filled with modern, masculine furniture. Sunlight crept around the edges of the closed drapes, giving the room a pale, muted glow. The bed was unmade, she'd expected that, but everything else had its own little place.
A faint smile shaped her lips as she glanced around at his things. She'd never had a reason to be in here before. It made her feel closer to him.
Grace wandered over to the bed and sat on the edge of the mattress. She flicked off her sandals and curled her toes into the beige rug. The sound of running water pounded on the other side of the ensuite door.
Her leg jiggled, and queasiness settled in her stomach.
"You could join me, you know." Tom's deep voice echoed in the shower stall.
