"I can't believe you haven't done it yet." my friend Maddy said. She was talking about the fact that I still hadn't had sex.
"I know. It's tragic." I said theatrically. I was kind of joking, kind of not. "I'll be a 20 year old virgin in two weeks, and I bet I'm the only person on campus over 18 that hasn't done it yet" I picked up a slice of pizza and took a bite.
"You could always go to a frat party and get drunk. It's not like there aren't tons of guys here that would stick it in anything that moves."
I shook my head in disgust. "That's not for me. Those guys are crawling with STD's and high on who knows what. I like to think I have standards.
I was frustrated. My mom and Dad met in college. Evidently, they locked eyes on freshman move in day and that was it.. They fell in love, dated exclusively for four years, then got married the week after graduation. They have been happy (more or less) ever since..
I thought when I went to college, love would find me the same way it found my parents, but so far my love life was completely and utterly non-existent. I went to my high school senior prom with a guy who had zero personality, and that was the end of my dating life. Of course I had talked to a few guys I had classes with, but nothing ever came of it. Now I was half way into my Junior year, about to turn 20 years old and there wasn't a man in sight.
"You'll find a boyfriend." Maddy said, which was easy for her to say. She was perfect. She was tall, blonde, gorgeous and smart. She had to practically swat men away like flies. I on the other hand was skinny, had mousy brown hair, green eyes, and had to work super hard for my grades. I wasn't like Maddie who seemed to get things effortlessly. She was well on her way to becoming the top student in the premed program and could probably do medical school and residency anywhere she wanted. I on the other hand would probably graduate with decent but not stellar grades, then go out and get a job.
"You're lucky to have Michael." I said, referring to her boyfriend she had started dating at the beginning of the year. I wasn't kidding, she really was. In fact, I sort of had a crush on Michael. He was gorgeous, and a super talented musician. How exactly she got hooked up with him, I didn't really know since he was a music major and a graduate student, and we were both undergrads in pre med, but somehow they had found each other.
Maddie shrugged. "I don't know if we'll work out long term. He's a good guy, and he has a big dick and all of that, but he's not long term relationship material. Not for me anyway. He's gorgeous, obviously, but a total nerd. He'd rather play the piano than go outside. Music people are weird, and it's really hard to make a living. I think I'd rather find somebody who wants to be a doctor like me, or at least have a stable career." she said.
I understood what she was saying. She was type A, and from what I could tell, Michael was driven in his way, but money didn't seem to be his primary concern. I had to admit though. From the few times I met him, liked him, and maybe even had a little bit of a crush on him myself. He seemed deep and mysterious. He was tall. He had curly hair that flopped in his face and piercing blue eyes. He also had a nice smile, and straight teeth. He seemed like the type of person who would understand if you told him a problem. Like he would get feelings and emotions, and want to sit and pick them apart with you. If he hadn't been Maddy's boyfriend, I would have been interested in getting to know him more.
Just then, Maddie's phone buzzed with some sort of notification. "Oh shit. She said putting her phone back on the table. I totally forgot. Do you want to go with me to the glee club concert?" She asked. "Michael is playing and he wants me to go. Personally, I'd rather watch paint dry, but if you go, that would help it not suck." she said..
"I love concerts." I said. "It will be fun."
"Oh my God, it's not what you think." she said, rolling her eyes. "It's stupid music. He'll be playing the piano for a choir, and they are singing old songs that people listened to 100 years ago. It will be boring." she said.
"I don't know. I played piano all through high school and sang in the choir. I'll probably like it." I told her, thinking she was being too harsh.
"Nerd." she said, laughed, and got up from the cafeteria table. "Well, I have to get to the library. I'll see you in class." she said, and picked up her stuff to leave.
As I watched her go, I looked at her with envy. Maddy was gorgeous. She had huge breasts, she was athletic, played volleyball in high school, she was social and really smart. Much smarter than me. She would go on to be a doctor for sure. She was one of the most intelligent people in the premed program where we went to school.
.
I guessed the initial attraction for choosing Michael as a boyfriend was like having a yen to her yang. Maybe they balanced each other out. He was quiet, she was loud. She was up for anything, and he was much more reserved. I guessed that was the initial attraction at least. I could see too though how it wasn't meant to be. She didn't really seem to like the arts, and Michael lived and breathed old time classical music composers and music theory.
On the day of the Glee Club concert, I found I was really excited to go. I wore a simple skirt and shirt combination with flats, and decided to wear my hair down for once, which I thought made me look a little less like the near 20 year old virgin I was; which at that time seemed like the worst tragedy ever.
The Glee club performance was in the smaller concert hall, and I loved everything about it.. Even the smell of the theater, and the red velvet seats that folded down. I loved the old fashioned decorative candelabras and faux candles that lit the aisles. It was such a pretty place, and very much different from my everyday existence inside a library, or a classroom learning about the human body, or physics.
When Michael took to the stage, he looked so dashing at the piano. His fingers seemed to fly across the keys, and I enjoyed a lot of older music I didn't know, but decided I liked. There were some older pieces that had been written by composers I had heard of before but didn't know their music (like Gershwin and Cole Porter) as well as some more modern pieces that even Maddie seemed to get into somewhat.
A lot of the music seemed difficult, and Michael probably had to practice it a great deal to make it come together. I know I would never be able to get on stage like that and accompany a choir like that. I had barely played a simplified version of Moonlight sonata at my piano teacher's end of year recital, and I had to practice a lot to even do that.
After it was over, Michael met us at the reception in the lobby.
"You made it." He said. He flashed his white teeth at us and gave Maddie a hug and a kiss on the cheek, he then winked me.
"You know Ellen, right?" Maddie said, even though I had met him dozens of times before. I was surprised she didn't remember. I certainly did.
"Oh sure." he said. "Good to see you again." Somehow he sounded like a man about 35 years old, though he was only a few years older than we were. He was in his first year of graduate school and we were Juniors. "Did you like the concert?" he asked us both.
"Wow, I took lessons all through school, but never could play that well." I told him. "You're phenomenal." I said and felt my face redden slightly.
"He's crazy gifted," Maddie agreed, though somehow there was a note of frustration in her voice. She wanted him to spend time with her instead of holed up in a practice room, I could tell. To her, piano didn't seem like a thing to practice, but rather a thing people just woke up knowing how to do.
"I could practice a billion hours and never be that good," I said, and he beamed at me. I was mesmerized by his blue eyes.
"I'd love to hear you play sometime." he said in an offhanded way. "What sort of repertoire did you play?"
I told him about my playing "Moonlight Sonata" and how I had done a few exams in my upper high school years.
"Sounds like you were pretty good." he said
I blushed again. He really was cute, and the way he looked at me, with such intensity went to my head. I could see how Maddie was attracted to him. He was so intense, and when he spoke to me, I felt like I was the only person in the world, even though Maddie had her hand threaded through his. I found myself really jealous of her at that moment. I wished I could have been by his side, touching him.
"Some of us are going out to Papa's. Do you guys want to come?" he asked.
Maddie looked at me, and I shrugged and said "sure."
Papa's was a pub just off campus that college kids went to, and stayed open until 3 am. We ordered some wings and beers, and I had a good time getting to know some of the people who were entirely different from the ones I saw every day in the science department. I had seen a few of them in humanity's classes and around campus, but didn't know them at all.
They were definitely creative types. Some of the singers started bellowing out a few lines of verse at the table, and there was a very animated discussion about the upcoming performance of a Gilbert and Sullivan production that was going to take place called "the Gondoliers."
I could tell Maddie was bored, and coped by drinking. She had already had two beers when she ordered an Irish car bomb, a drink that combined a shot of whiskey with an Irish stout. She asked me if I wanted one too, and for some reason, I stepped out of my comfort zone and said yes, though I knew it would make me very tipsy and I should stick to nursing one or two beers like I usually did.
I think part of me just wanted to loosen up around Michael, who I was a little smitten with. It also didn't help that he seemed to be staring at me, despite the fact that he was sitting right next to Maddie. I guess too I also reasoned I deserved to let off a little steam since we had a big anatomy test the day before.
I knew Maddie would probably go all weekend partying and be fine on Monday morning. She was just like that. The kind who could work hard and play harder. I envied her for that, but it wasn't me. I knew I would probably have a hangover for a few days at least, but at that time I didn't care.
There was definitely something that attracted me to Michael though, and I couldn't help but lock eyes with him at intervals, though I really tried not to. He even had his arm around Maddie at certain points and I couldn't help thinking he was looking at me and drinking me in. I tried to tell myself I was crazy. I certainly wasn't as pretty as Maddie. My breasts were small compared to her C cup, and my hair was shoulder length and cute. Her skin flawless and tanned, mine fair and pale. In short, she was Jessica Rabbit and I was more of a washed out Tinkerbelle.
