Since the frist time I saw Joe, I loved him. It was a silly stupid thing, to love someone at frist sight, but I did. Later, I told everyone, never fall for a pretty ass. At the time he was 16 and I was 19, and I felt I was too old for him. So I fixed him up with another girl and they got engaged and since he was happy, I was happy.
When I moved to Alaska, I took my best friend with me, Bette. It was sorta funny, because Bette had dark brown hair and I have blonde hair and it seemed wherever we went men were ever so nice to us. However, I was waiting for true love, so even though I was in my early twenties by this time, I had never had a lover.
When Joe and his girlfriend broke up Bette and I suggested he come stay with us. Afterall, in the town he lived in the major employeer had shut down and jobs were hard to get while in Anchorage there were jobs all over the place. We pitched in on his ticket and sent him half the cost to come.
When I saw him I felt those old feelings just come bubbling to the surface. I thought I was hideing it well, but he must of noticed, because he started flirting with me. I knew he was more on the rebound rather than truly intrested, but...I wanted him, so everytime he paid me the slightest attention I was happy.
We began to touch more. Back rubs became kissing, kissing became touching...but he never rushed me. Whenever I said stop, he'd stop. Once, we were both so turned on and he had slid his fingers into me. The frist time anyone had touched me there, and I ached for him so bad, but when he went to take the next logical step, I told him to stop. He rolled away from me and asked over his shoulder "How do you feel?"
"Fustrated." I said.
"Good." He replied tersely, and I had to laugh at his grumpy tone of voice.
I knew he didn't love me like I loved him, so I didn't want to take that final step. After all, I had saved this symbol of hope for the right man, but I was weakening, as I loved Joe so much and just wanted to be with him.
On November 17th we were coming home in Joe's VW bug; he'd bought it for $500 from one of his co-workers at his new job and was always happy to take us out in it. A pretty girl pulled up beside us in the next lane.
"Boy, I'd like to meet her!" he said as we came down the icy hill towards the stop lights. We began to slow down as our turn was just before the light and the girl passed us.
Ahead of us, on the other side of the lights, a big Bronco truck pulled out of the bar on the corner and stopped in our lane; then pulled forward and stopped in the second lane. I know the girl in the car that had passed us thought like we did that the truck would advance to the turn lane in the center, but it didn't.
The girl had a green light, so she hadn't even started putting on the brakes until she realized the bigger truck wasn't going to move again. But by then it was too late, going 45 downhill on icy winter Alaskan streets...she plowed into the truck and bounced off it, pushing the truck into the turn lane as her own car did a lazy 360 and stopped faceing us.