My fascination with her started with one glance, one small smile. I had seen her around before, but never really noticed her. One day it changed.
I had gone to the corner store for some snacks before the game that night, and she was visiting her dad, who lived downstairs in my building. As I got home, she was sitting outside on his front step, listening to her music player. I glanced up as I turned down the driveway, and she looked up enough to see me coming. She tilted her head ever so slightly, and smiled. It was adorable, and endearing, and I smiled back and walked on. After that, whenever she was around, I tried my best to sneak glances.
I couldn't get her out of my head. She wasn't my usual fare; but there was something about her that drew me in. She had a slight, girlish build: long, coltish legs that seemed mismatched to an ass that screamed out to be manhandled and a chest that was still filling out. She had that girl next door quality, with her t-shirt and jeans, relaxed attitude, and that smile: it had a way of disarming you, and yet it wasn't the most perfect smile. Maybe it was just the way it fit her personality, her smile seemed to hide in plain sight, just like her.
A few weeks went by, and I knew I had to do something to clear my head. I figured she couldn't be interested back, so maybe if I just had a talk with her, I could convince myself that this was just fantasy. I let it slide until one day she was back out on the steps.
"Hi," I took the first step.
"Hi," she answered, her voice timid and quiet.
I walked past with two bags of groceries, then pulled up my courage, and threw caution to the wind. I turned around, and walked back over to her steps.
"I've seen you over here before. My name is Brian."
"I'm Tarah; I come over here to see my dad. Him and my mom are divorced, so," she trailed off.
"So you live at your mom's?"
"Only until I finish college, then I am moving away from this town!" She laughed, nervous and shy. I was caught up in rapid fire thoughts: she's in college? Never would have guessed that. She hasn't blown me off yet. Maybe she likes me too? How do I find out? Where do I go from here?
What came out of my mouth happened by pure instinct alone, because my brain was long gone by this point. "Wanna grab a coffee? It's gotta beat sitting alone on the front step."
There's that smile again. "Sure, that would be great."
"Let me just put these groceries away in my place, and I'll be back down in a minute."
"OK, I'll be here."
I ran those groceries up, tossed them on the table, and slowed down only when I got close to the last corner before she could see me. Trying hard to play it cool, I popped around the corner, and she gathered up her stuff. As we walked down the street, we made the awkward first steps in any conversation where you are trying to get to know someone. No, I live alone, I'm single. So sorry to hear you aren't close to your dad. Yeah, it is nice, a great location for apartments. It's great to see the weather finally starting to turn toward a nice fall. Wow, nursing! That's a good paying job, and it's gotta be pretty fulfilling, too. Nice choice for your studies. Me? I'm just a manager of a men's clothing store at the mall. It pays the bills, right?
We sat down with our coffees at the shop, and things just built from there. No, she loved her dad, but hated how he hurt her mom. She only came to see him because he was alone now, and she hated that more than the hurt he caused the whole family. She had a younger brother and sister, but they stayed with her mom. She sat on the step because he would sit in front of the TV and ignore her after the first few minutes of conversation. I could kinda relate, my parents did the same thing, and they would fixate on only what they wanted, and not get that I just needed to live my life. She totally understood, and that's why she wanted to get out of there so bad. She couldn't focus at home, she tried to keep the family somewhat together by visiting her dad; she just needed to move on, and until she could, she had decided to just stretch to cover it all herself.
The conversation lapsed as we both sipped slowly on our coffees. So similar, yet so different. There was something tangible there, and I could feel it. I knew I had to see her again, and I tried to think of a way to. I hit on the idea by complete luck.
"So why not bring your homework over to your dad's? It's not like he would bother you once you started working on it. Then you could focus and get it done, and help get your grades back up."
"I would, but it's a lot to carry over from my mom's, and I don't have a car. And I hate taking the bus, just thinking of all the germs, ugh..."
"Well, and don't take this the wrong way, but if you'd like, I could pick you up on my way home on Fridays. You normally stay the whole weekend, right? Then you could bring your books, work on your studies, and get school done and move on with your life."
"I could never impose like that, I'll be ok."