"This whole month has been utter shit!" I say aloud in the small room I shared with another girl.
"What are you talking about Ashley? It's our first month of being in college! We're away from our parents; we can do whatever we want, whenever we want!" My roommate responded. She always had an optimistic attitude towards things. I don't know how she ever could, seeing as she stayed in the room all day and night and only ventured out to seek food down in the, aptly named, mess hall.
"I know but, come on Rachel! Did you really think our first weeks in college would be this mundane? I thought I'd be going to parties and drinking beers and you know, just hanging out!" I didn't want to tell Rachel the main reason why I was frustrated. I don't think she would understand.
We had to be the oddest pairing I had ever known. We both liked the same music, the same tv shows and we both read the same books but when it came to socializing she was more of a wallflower than I was. She shunned all the revelry, all the parties, all the joy that involved alcohol. However, I wanted to completely submerge myself in those activities. This is college and I wanted it to be like the movies but she never wanted to go so I never went. I guess that aspect of college is being accomplished: sticking with your roommate.
"Not really. I'm okay with what we do every weekend. I'm content." And she smiled that small smile that I just knew she had to be lying to herself. I knew that the conversation was over, my complaint would go unheard and I would be stuck in the same weekend cycle I had entered since a month ago.
"Do you want to order wings tonight? Maybe hot ones again?"
"Sure, Rachel, same place?"
"Definitely!"
It took a few more weeks for me to realize that Rachel could be left to her own devices. It would be hard but I needed to make new friends and create those "College" experiences on my own. I was not about to spend my freshman year sitting in my dorm room, eating wings with my roommate every weekend and watching streaming shows and movies.
When the Kappa Phi Gamma sorority started their Recruitment Week, I knew this was my chance to spend my college years the right way; this was my chance to have the "College" experiences I had seen every character in the movies go through. Plus, they all really seemed like a nice group of girls.
It wasn't until later on that I found out about the Kappa Phi Gamma sorority's reputation. Every boy on campus called them by a different name because of the rumors that surrounded the Kappa Phi Gamma name. I always knew sorority girls were a little sluttier than the average girl but it seemed as though these girls took it to a completely different level. They had a reputation of loving anal sex. From the stories, I heard, it wasn't just about LOVING anal sex, it was begging for it, craving it, wanting it everywhere. The rumors were spread all over campus until eventually the Kappa Phi Gamma girls earned a new name: Alpha Sigma Sigma. I thought it was a little clever when I heard it but still pretty immature. I never thought the girls looked like the type to love anal and I know I never tried it but I did want the "College" experience so I carried on through Recruitment week.
When Recruitment week started, that was when college really started for me. Every night was a different activity; Monday was a meet a greet night, Tuesday was a poker tournament, Wednesday was a night where we met our brother sorority and we got paired with a brother that took us on a date, Thursday we partied with our brother fraternity and Friday we partied with the brother fraternity at our sorority house. Every night was fun and every night I drank! For a moment, I wondered how many brain cells I still had in my head, then my favourite song came on and I forgot all about those kinds of thoughts.
Sorority life was fun until the last night. The sisters of Kappa Phi Gamma lined all the new recruits into a straight line and the oldest, Krissy, told us we had to select a room in the house and wait for our surprise. I wondered what the surprise was, but in that moment in time I was too high on the sisterly love to care, I so wanted to be a part of Kappa Phi Gamma.
I chose the room farthest to the left, unlocked the door and walked in. The first thing I noticed about the room was the copious amounts of pink everything; the bed sheets, pillows, curtains, even the chairs were pink. I wondered if I had somehow passed out and this was simply a hallucination sponsored by the color Pink. I walked over to the pink-frilled mirror and examined myself. I never thought myself to be entirely sexy but those happy-go-lucky girls made me look at myself with a much closer eye. No longer did I just see an average girl, I saw a sexually charged woman. And she was ready to pounce.
Voices snapped me out of my train of thought! I recognized the tone as male voices. I pressed my ear up against the door and heard the oldster frat brother give their new recruits the same instructions Krissy gave us. I pushed myself away from the door and I waited, waited to see who would choose my room. I could hear the wild stampede outside my door, the boys were more eager to enter the rooms than the girls were, but I stood, frozen, nervous and worried.
The door knob turned slowly, and I heard the click. Slowly, the door was pushed open and in the door way stood Julius. I was relieved that he was the one who chose my room. I really like Julius. We met before at the mixer and I really like being with him but every other girl wanted to talk to him and dance with him so we never saw each other again. I guess it was fate that made us choose the same room, farthest to the left.
Krissy's voice suddenly came out of nowhere. There were no visible signs of a PA system but yet, he voice could be heard clearly from inside the room Ashley and Julius were now standing in.
"Ladies and gentlemen, of course, tonight you become a part of the Kappa Phi Gamma and its brother sorority, Kappa Phi Alpha. At least you have a chance too. In your rooms, there should be a brother and a sister. Girls and boys, to become one of us you must share in our secret. A secret that we have all be part of for as long as we've been sisters. To join us, you must have sex tonight. Consummate your union into our brotherhood and never share this secret with anyone! However, if you choose not to; the door is open and you are able to leave but you can tell no one of what you heard tonight and you are forbidden from joining. Now then, enjoy yourselves, I know I will." She gave a little chuckle as her voice trailed away from the room.
I was shocked but I was not surprised. Their reputation still stood ground; I was waiting for the day when we would have to do something like this. I was still nervous though, I had only once before, had sex. It was uncomfortable and I did not enjoy myself. I glanced over to Marcus and he looked nervous too. From the looks of him, he was a virgin. That thought was a complete surprise to me. He was an extremely sexy guy.
I heard doors open and close, one by one and footsteps on the staircase. I knew some girls would leave, and for a moment I considered it. I considered what I would be leaving behind, what possibilities I would be trading, the sisterhood, the "College" experiences, the bond that lasts after graduation and the connections in the most prestigious companies. I considered how easy it would be to open that door and just walk out, walk down those stairs and never look back at this sorority house again. I considered all those things but my legs never moved towards the door. I wanted to stay and be a Kappa Phi Gamma sister.
I slowly walked over to Julius and I got down on my knees in front of him. Our eyes locked as we both knew what was going to happen. His eyes were brown and they looked nervous.
