Matching Hearts

In memory of Fred Parris - thank you for the music!

Nancy picked up the sign to see if the glue had set. It had: every pink and red jellybean spelling out the party theme - FUCK VALENTINE'S DAY - stayed in place. "Looks like it's ready," she told Lindsay, her sorority sister and best friend, who was busy sorting the conversation hearts. "But are you sure this isn't a bit much? If any of the guys is a romantic, I could see it turning them off."

"They're

guys

, Nan," Lindsay answered without looking up. "Straight guys, too, as far as we know. If they're romantics, they shouldn't be here anyhow. By the way, are you in for the draw or not? I need to know whether or not to put a heart in for you and..." She dropped her voice to a whisper in case any of the first-year sisters overheard. "...and which guy," she finished.

"Sure, I'm in," Nancy replied.

"Which guy?" Lindsay whispered in an exasperated tone as she picked up a pair of hearts and dropped one in the women's basket. She had a penknife at the ready to etch some microscopic notches that would let Barry and the other A-list guys know which was hers.

"Any," Nancy whispered. "Don't pre-match me."

"Are you sure?" Lindsay asked out loud.

Nancy nodded and turned to pin the sign up over the dining room table.

Lindsay shrugged and put Nancy's heart message-down on the men's tray. She should have known Nancy wouldn't choose anyone in advance, for both women recalled their freshman year.

Then as now, the first-year sisters hadn't known some of the hearts were marked to ensure the seniors got matched with the best-looking guys. They also hadn't known the men got one heart without a match, so one poor nerd always ended up emptyhanded. The unfortunate third wheel that year had been a potbellied vermin named Keith something, and Lindsay still recalled being utterly petrified she would end up with him. The silly boy she had ended up with was a skinny, gangling guy who at least had a nice smile - Patrick something - who had at least been a good sport when she'd taken him to her room and told him he'd best not even touch her.

She couldn't recall Patrick's last name and she'd never known Keith's. She did remember the full name of the boy Nancy had ended up with. Joseph Ramsey. She remembered because he and Nancy had hit it off so well they'd ended up dating through sophomore year, and were still friends now. To Lindsay, of course, Joseph had looked like just as much of a lousy catch as Keith or Patrick; but Nancy had adored him. So of course she wanted to leave it up to chance tonight.

Lindsay did not. She'd paid her dues, and tonight Barry was to be hers. Barry the captain of the track team, who could've been a Speedo model, who could probably have any gal on campus and whom she'd been lusting after for three years - tonight that lust would be satisfied at last. When Lindsay had tapped him to invite the selected guys the others wanted, and to round up the right number of nerds to be the freshman girls' booby-prizes and the lone man out, the other senior sisters had all been sensible enough not to argue the point with her or to vie for being matched with him. Connie, her freshman year roommate, had said it best: "Hands off, ladies, unless you want Lindsay short sheeting your beds until May."

Lindsay probably wouldn't have resorted to that, she mused now. Probably. She was glad the others had been sensible enough not to test her resolve on that one, though.

The front door opened. Probably Barry coming by for the cheat sheet for whose heart was whose. Lindsay grabbed it up and gave the supposedly random hearts on the tray one last look to make sure the clues matched. They did, but when she turned to hand over the sheet to Barry, she was disappointed to see Faith brushing the snow off her duck boots. "Hi, Lindsay!" she said in that too-obsequious tone that had had fooled the others into admitting her during pledge week. "Am I too late to help with the party?"

"Yeah, you are," Lindsay said. "But it's all right, Nancy and I have it under control."

"Don't listen to her, Faith," Nancy said. "There really wasn't anything left to do except sort the hearts." Faith didn't need to know - couldn't know - that the seniors had to be the ones to do that anyway. "Thanks again for your help this morning." Putting up the pink and red streamers and rearranging the living room furniture had been an all-hands event, crowded but quick.

"It was fun," Faith said, hanging her coat up on the rack inside the door. She took off her glasses, which were fogged up. "Think I ought to wear contacts for the party?"

"Guys prefer that," Lindsay said.

"Not all guys," Nancy said. "But it's up to you, Faith. I hope you wear your hair down, though. You don't want to look like you just came from the library."

"Like I look now?" Faith chuckled. Neither of her friends needed to be told she'd spent the afternoon there, as she usually did on Saturdays. Swathed in a college sweatshirt and jeans, her dark hair tied back with a pencil for a barrette clip, she was the very epitome of a nerdy but plucky coed.

"I'm afraid so," Lindsay said. "The kind of guys we're having over won't want a library rat for the night."

"Oh, they won't be getting one," Faith promised. "I told you I bought a dress just for tonight, didn't I?"

Nancy said yes and Lindsay said no, in unison.

"Oh, well, I did, whether I told you or not," Faith said. "Don't worry, I'll knock their socks off. Once I finish my calc homework anyway." And with that she was off up the stairs.

"She bought a dress for tonight?" Lindsay said. "Doesn't she know the guys the freshmen get matched with aren't worth dressing up for?"

"You and I didn't know that freshman year," Nancy reminded her.

"Maybe you didn't," Lindsay said. "I did my homework about what this party is really all about. Guess I should've known Faith wouldn't, though. I almost feel sorry for her, but it's for her own good."

"Is it really?" Nancy asked. "She's such a sweetheart."

"Exactly," Lindsay said. "She's way too nice for her own good. Poor thing's probably a virgin, even."

Nancy was about to ask just what was wrong with that, when the doorbell rang.

This time it was Barry. "Hi, Nancy," he said as she let him in. "Got the list ready?" he asked Lindsay.

"I sure do," Lindsay said, and she led him to the kitchen, where she could be sure they wouldn't be overheard upstairs. "Here you are," she said, handing it over. "All the seniors except Nancy had special requests."

"Even you?" Barry asked her with a grin.

Lindsay gave a dramatic sigh. "Yes, Barry, at long last I've decided to let you have your way with me. I do hope you won't overdo the joy when we get matched."

"Looking forward to it," Barry said, overlooking the list to make sure he could read all the names correctly. "Can't tell you how jealous I was freshman year when I heard about this party."

"Couldn't you tell from the freshman who were invited that it was really a compliment if you weren't?"

"It was kind of hard to miss. But even so, those nerds all got laid, didn't they? All but Keith?"

Lindsay burst into giggles. "Oh my God, you remember Keith! Anyway, Barry, I suspect most of them didn't really. You know the rules, we have to take our guy to our room but we're not obligated to do anything with them if we don't want to."

"Didn't know that," Barry said. "I mean, that's good, but no, I'd never heard about that. What I do hear is most of them do end up in bed."

"Sympathy fucks, I guess," Lindsay said. "Or maybe some of the girls just want to say they're not virgins. In any case, I sure as heck didn't let my freshman guy touch me. It's don't ask don't tell with the others, except Nancy because she never shut up about Joseph."

"Got it," Barry said, folding the cheat sheet up to put in his pocket. "Well, I'll be seeing you in a couple of hours."

"I trust the freshman guys are a bunch of losers?"

"You'll be delighted, Lindsay."

"I sure think I will be," she replied, mentally undressing Barry already as she saw him to the door.

Faith always left twice as much time for calculus homework as for her other classes, and she always had a crack at it on Saturday in case she needed Sunday as well. This weekend, for once, she wouldn't need that extra day. Maybe, she admitted to herself as she triumphantly stapled the papers together and set them in her binder, it was nervousness about tonight that had inspired her efficiency. Where typically her mind wandered to anything except math while she was slogging through the problem sets, today it hadn't, at all.

Was it that she didn't want to think about the party? Faith didn't think so. The seniors had told them again and again, they could say no if they wished. No, Faith thought it was probably that she was feeling inclined to say yes, and somehow that made her feel guilty. She knew it shouldn't - she was a woman now, and had long since put to bed the sense of guilt that used to come with playing with herself. And she'd heard the rumors about KKG and the Fuck Valentine's Day party even before she'd pledged. Back in September it had sounded rather appealing in a shamefully naughty way.

It still did. But as Faith from her desk to undress for the shower, she couldn't be sure if the butterflies within were fluttering about in anticipation or in shame.

Or was it embarrassment? As Faith tossed her t-shirt and sweatshirt on her bed, having already taken her jeans off, she couldn't resist a look in the mirror. Without her glasses she had to step up closer to see the young woman looking back at her in a plain white bra and panties. How it would feel for a guy to see her like this, and then in nothing at all, for the first time? She was still young enough to remember a time when she'd sworn up and down no boy would ever see her naked - a memory that made her laugh now and admit that now the idea had plenty of appeal.

Be honest

, she admonished herself as she undid her bra,

this party was a big part of why you pledged.

Having finally come clean - to herself anyway - she felt nothing but pleasant anticipation as she pulled her panties down and found they were rather damp. Faith had never been one to prance around naked even in her own room, but in the heat of the newly liberated moment she felt quite happy to do so.

Casting aside a fleeting thought that maybe she should save herself for the party, Faith got busy with her right hand. Usually she took to her bed for this, but she was feeling too wound up to lie down just now. It was a narrow room, but there was space enough for her to stroll from her desk to her bed and back again, teasing her clit gently as she went and imagining welcoming her match inside - inside the room and inside her - in just a few hours.

Maybe he could teach her just what to do. Maybe he wouldn't know what to do either, and it would be an adventure for them to join in on together. Faith liked that idea even more, and she saw them laughing gently together at the pleasant embarrassment as they undressed each other, his own secrets coming out in the open along with hers, the big moment he was inside her...oh, how delicious that would feel!

She was just past the foot of her bed when she had to stop and give into the sensation and rub harder. Imagining his hardness clutched within and his gentle hands on her breasts and hers all over his body, Faith came so hard it was a struggle to stay quiet. She laughed once the danger had passed - what was the harm given what they were all going to be up to tonight? - and then swung on her bathrobe to wear to the shower.

Only when she had the sash tied and her bucket and towel at the ready did Faith pull the pencil out and let her hair down. Something about Lindsay's comment had her feeling rebellions about her hair now - just what was wrong with being a library rat anyway? She had never warmed up to Lindsay and had finally come to admit lately that she really didn't like her very much.

Of course, Nancy, whom she did like, had also advised her to wear her hair down. But Faith could have done without the 'library rat' comment.

Lindsay was right, most of the younger sisters knew the score and, although they all wore something pretty, none but Faith went all out on their appearance. So it was that Faith was the last one downstairs, after even a few of the guys had arrived. She responded with a shy grin and a quiet "thank you" to the collective wow of appreciation that went up when she blossomed forth in her flashy red dress, with her nails painted to match and her hair down for a change. She had opted to keep her glasses on, but she had switched out her everyday ones for a more elegant looking pair that her mother had insisted on buying, and which she rarely wore because they felt too fancy. Tonight there was no such thing as "too fancy".

"Faith, you look wonderful!" said Connie, who was busy setting the munchies on the table.

"What a change!" agreed Joan, who was holding court with two guys by the fireplace and was herself dressed in a plain skirt and top as usual.

"Who is that?" Dan, the star of the basketball team, asked Joan.

"Her name's Faith," Joan said. "Sweet girl, but I didn't see that coming!"

"The butterfly emerges, huh?" asked Joan's other male companion, James.

Joan laughed. "That's why you got a ticket here, James, poetry like that!" James was one of the few invitees who was neither a jock nor a nerd; Joan vaguely believed he'd been invited because he'd helped one of the sisters pass a tough exam last semester. Presumably that sister, whoever she was, had arranged for his heart.

Faith made a beeline for the punch bowl. She wasn't a big drinker, but her acute awareness that one of the cute guys she spotted just might be helping her out of her dress shortly had her nerves running wild. Two of her fellow freshmen, Heather and Kathy, were already well into their first serving of the dangerously sweet concoction. "I definitely need some of this!" Faith told them, grabbing up a tumbler.

"Is that your prom dress?" asked Kathy, who had also worn red for the occasion, of a much less ostentatious shade.

"I didn't go to the prom," Faith said. "No one asked me. I bought this for this party."

"You didn't miss anything," said Heather, who was wearing a lacy black number. "This was my prom dress and no one could even see it in the dark room. I thought, what's the point of dressing up?"

"Sorry to hear that," Faith said, forcing a conciliatory smile; she didn't like Heather very much. "But hey, if I had gone to more stuff like that in high school, maybe I wouldn't be so nervous now!"

"It's nothing to be nervous about," said Kathy. "You can always say no if you don't like the guy you get matched with."

"I know," Faith said. "I'm just hoping it'll be someone I do like, you know? It's been at the back of my mind ever since pledge week." She gulped down most of her punch and then helped herself to another serving, and spotted a few more of the guests arriving at the door. "Well, I'm going to go mingle with our guests," said to Kathy only, hoping to avoid another of Heather's condescending retorts.

That retort did in fact come, as soon as Faith was out of earshot and exchanging compliments with a couple of the seniors. "She has no clue, poor baby," Heather said.

"Oh, go easy on her," Kathy said. "Some of the nerds are probably nice guys underneath it all."

"Yeah, but be honest," Heather said. "If you could choose between Barry and one of the guys we really are gonna get matched with?"

Kathy laughed. "No contest, you're right. But who knows what Faith likes? She's such a nerd herself, after all."

"I wouldn't feel sorry for her if she'd dressed like herself," Heather said. "She might as well be wearing an 'I don't get it' sign around her neck!"

Kathy glanced over to see a couple of goofy-looking freshmen stepping in. "Right now I wish I didn't get it either," she confessed.

Faith had no trouble catching the eye of a dapper looking guest who was chatting with Emily, a sophomore and one of the few others who had dressed up almost as much as Faith had, and Mary Beth, her favorite of her senior sisters. "Well hello!" the man said, shaking her hand. "I'm Will."

"I'm Faith. Lovely to meet you." She felt as pretentious as she sounded, but she was coming to realize she enjoyed playing that part.

"Faith, Will is the orchestra concertmaster," Mary Beth explained.

"Concertmaster?" Faith asked.

"Lead violin," Will explained.

"Oh, okay! I guess tonight someone will find out if you can play a woman like a violin, huh?" As soon as the words were out, Faith could scarcely believe she'd said it. But once again she found she rather liked it.

Will howled with laughter. "Oh my!" he said. "Faith, I definitely need some of what you're drinking!"

As soon as he was gone, Emily said, "I wouldn't get any designs on him, Faith."

"I have as much of a chance as anyone, don't I?" Faith said.

Mary Jane poked Emily and shook her head furtively. "Of course you do, Faith," she said. "It's just that our chances with any one guy are one in...twenty or whatever." There were 24 women in the house, but a few always made a point of being elsewhere for the Fuck Valentine's Day party.

"I guess," Faith said. "But those chances aren't too bad, are they?" Then she spotted a guy she knew, Ben from her political science study group, standing awkwardly on his own just inside the door. "Oh, I should go say hello to Ben there," she said, and was off.

"She doesn't know, does she?" Emily asked Mary Jane.

"You're not supposed to know either, Emily," Mary Jane pointed out. "None of the underclasswomen should know."

"Oh, leave her alone, Mary Jane," said Lindsay, who had sidled up with Nancy a step behind her as usual. "Didn't you know about it freshman year?"

"No, as a matter of fact," Mary Jane said.

"Me neither," Nancy reminded Lindsay. "Faith'll figure it out soon enough. Let's not spoil it for her just yet."

"My thoughts exactly," Mary Jane said.

"Fine," Emily agreed. "But I don't believe for one second that Will's heart isn't marked for some senior."

"Oh, it is all right," Mary Jane said with a wicked grin. "Don't worry, if he really can play a woman like a violin, you'll all hear it from my room."

Ben, looking shy and awkward in a dark green sweater that was more attractive than he was, didn't even recognize the beautiful woman approaching him until he heard her voice. "Hi, Ben! I didn't know you were invited!"

"Oh, Faith!" He covered his mouth to mask his nerdy laugh, but it rang out all the same. "Sorry, I didn't recognize you!"

"Yeah, well, I never wore this to poli sci, did I?" Faith acknowledged, looking down at herself. "And I don't suppose you thought I..."

"Would be at a party like this?" Ben asked. When Faith nodded, he said, "Well, no. But I never imagined I'd be invited either."

"Who did invite you?"

"Barry. He said it was my reward for improving so much in cross country last fall. I guess most of the guys didn't think I'd make it, but I did."

"I see." Then an unpleasant thought came to Faith's mind. "Can I ask, the other guys on the team..."

"No one knows anything about it, at least not officially," Ben said. "Barry swore me to secrecy when he invited me."

"Oh good."

"But you know, everyone on campus knows KKG does this every year," Ben said gently. "Unofficially, word gets around. But I haven't told anyone I was invited and I don't know who else was, except Barry. Sorry."

"No, it's fine." Faith felt her lips curl into a naughty grin. "To tell you the truth, I finally realized tonight, I've really been looking forward to this! For months I told myself I shouldn't, but..."

"No, that makes sense to me," Ben said. "And of course you can always say no. So no need to worry you'll get matched with me or anything."