This is a prequel to the stories about Miranda Grossman, e.g.,
Mandy's Cemetery Adventure
and
Mandy Goes To Confession.
This was originally submitted elsewhere more than two years ago, but I heavily revised it. It's about how Paul D'Amato met Miranda, although their names don't appear in this segment. This is taking place nearly three years after the My Summer with Nora series ends in 1974.
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In August 1977, I had been out of college for a few weeks. Just to have something to do and get a bit of money as I considered my future, I took a job as an usher at the Loew's Paradise Theater on the Grand Concourse.
It was still an imposing old Bronx institution, and the interior had been done in what I've heard called a Venetian or an Italian Baroque style. Whatever it was, it was impressive. However, the former 4,000-seat venue from 1929 had been split into a triplex, with the upstairs balcony being sealed off with its own screen. The former main floor was divided into two units, and I was assigned to handle both of those.
There wasn't much to do except be present and keep an eye on things. Between showings, I took a broom and dustpan and swept out the floors as best I could. Fortunately, the time of the showings were staggered, so I could do one room and then have an hour before getting to the other one.
I got to see movies as they were released, but then I had to see them over and over again. I tried to block them out, but I could only partially do that. I had never seen a movie as often as the ones that played there. After a few days, I knew every bit of dialogue, every little plot point, and exactly where those were within the film.
At the theater job, the only dress requirement was that I wear a sports coat -- I only had one -- and a tie. I had a flashlight that I could clip onto my belt, and that was about it.
One weekday afternoon I was leaning on a wall halfway down a room, trying not to watch
Kentucky Fried Movie.
A lot of it reached my consciousness anyway. Whatever had once been funny about the film was long gone. About the only parts I still noticed were the bare tits in "Catholic High School Girls in Trouble" and the segment at the end where a couple had cowgirl-style sex in front of their TV.
The wall was one of the ornate 1929 originals. The opposite one had been built very recently, and it was not decorated at all.
Sex was on my mind because I hadn't had any in about seven weeks. There had been a much longer dry spell the previous year, but the new one was somehow bothering me more.
In June, my girlfriend Donna Azzato had broken up with me. The reasons for that were mostly my own fault, but that's a story for another time. As for the other four ladies I had lost, maybe they had become bored but mostly they had found older, more successful guys with better prospects than I offered.
It was irksome because I could never see the breakups coming. Everything would be going along fine, and then they would just disappear. I had to go looking for them, and then I would get some vague explanation about how it was "time to move on." One of them, my first, was AWOL for two weeks. Then I saw her getting out of a car on campus, a Triumph Stag convertible that was being driven by her new boyfriend.
So I was pondering my life on that day and I was also trying to ignore the John Landis movie on the screen. I was suddenly aware of someone, a woman, singing somewhere in the theater. It was in the back of the auditorium, so I headed there to investigate.
In the very last row, about three seats in, a young woman was sitting there doing a Judy Collins song. She was moderately loud, I'd say, and she was into the second verse already. That was the one about how, "I really don't know love at all."
I leaned in and said, "Miss, this is a movie theater. Please don't sing in here."
She was immediately argumentative about it, "But take a look; there are only about five people in here, and they're all down in the front."
"I know, but I was about halfway down and I could clearly hear you."
She put on a frown. From the start I got the feeling that she was putting on an act, being tongue-in-cheek with me. "You really have a stick up your ass about this."
"It's my job, among other things, to make sure the other patrons aren't disturbed."
There was enough light from the screen for me to make a quick assessment of her. She was young, about my age, and she looked good. Her face was a bit round and on the wide side. Her dark-blonde hair was short by the standards of that era, coming down just beneath her chin. She had cut it so that there were bangs over her forehead
Yeah, she really is cute.
In my summer loneliness, I thought,
I'd really like someone like her for myself.
"Maybe it's that you don't like the song. Joni Mitchell actually wrote it, you know."
"I do know that. Now, please, be quiet."
She gave an overly-dramatic shrug, and I left to patrol the area behind the last row. I had been gone less than twenty seconds when I heard her again. This time she was singing T-Rex's "Bang a Gong."
It seemed that this song was aimed at me, or rather it was about how I might be perceiving her. For a second I considered ignoring her, and then I decided that she was deliberately bugging me. I couldn't let this challenge to my meager authority go unanswered.
I went back to her row, and she gave me a big smile. It seemed genuine, and it disarmed me for a moment. I was aware again of how pretty she was and I'm sure she knew the impact she was having on me.
She said, "So you don't like T-Rex either."
"It's not the song, it's the fact that you are singing in here at all."
"But it's true, I am dirty and sweet, but I'm definitely not your girl yet."
The word "yet" didn't consciously register with me, but I still thought,
is this chick flirting with me, or is she just teasing me because she can get away with it?
I took another look at her, and this time I checked out her clothes. She had an orange short-sleeved shirt that was open to reveal a black halter top underneath. I couldn't see it clearly, but she also had a black skirt. She wasn't a petite, dainty girl; she had a nice solidity to her body. And she was smiling at me again.
I also was getting the feeling that she was a bit high, maybe more than a bit, on something. It didn't seem to be alcohol or pot, the only substances that I was familiar with myself. She gave the impression of being very lucid and energetic, yet more than a touch manic.
Even though I was losing this encounter, I didn't know what to do about it. I repeated myself, "With all due respect miss, you have to be quiet in here."
She wagged her head and pouted at me, "And with all due respect, there's nothing you can do about it. And stop calling me miss; your politeness is really fake." Before I could respond she said, "Do you like the Rolling Stones? You know what's a great song?"
I knew I was going to hear part of it, and it turned out to be "Paint it Black." After singing some of it, she laughed, "That's us again. I'm the girl in the summer clothes and you're the one waiting until your darkness goes."
It had to be an illusion, but I had the feeling that she was reading my mind. It had been just a few weeks since my girlfriend Donna had broken up with me. That had been so recent that I was still mourning the loss.
Rather stupidly, I said something that played right into her hands. "What does any of that have to do with me?"
"You know, 'with flowers and my love, both never to come back.' "
I tried a different tack. "Are you high on something?"
"Oh yeah, I've had a little something to perk me up today."
Instead of giving my attention to the problem at hand, I glanced up at the screen to have a moment to think. The film was in the middle of the long martial arts parody, a movie within the movie called
A Fistful of Yen.
The Chinese warlord, or whatever he was, was saying, "take him to Detroit." It was my favorite line in the whole production.
Then my difficult patron sang again, "Oh, I miss you Amoreena, like the king bee misses honey."
All of my experiences had taught me not to get rattled by a woman, but it was happening anyway. And she seemed to intuitively understand how to do it to me. "Shouldn't you be doing your job ushering? I mean, you have that big flashlight hanging off your belt."
"I am doing my job, which is dealing with you." That was a mistake, to respond directly to such a question.
"Yeah, so that's why you're standing there gawking at me. If I was a guy, you wouldn't be doing that."
Just go, get away from her, you can't change the situation.
But no, I tried to turn things against her. I said, "You're like the Sirens in the Odyssey leading the sailors into the rocks."
"Wow, you're really a smart guy, referring to Greek mythology. So what rocks do you think I'm leading you into?"
I had no answer. It angered me that she was not just scoffing at my requests, but she was also taunting me with her sexual power. She emphasized the latter by putting her left arm over the seat back and then putting her left foot on the seat next to her. For the first time, I saw that her footgear was white sneakers with white ankle socks.
"Oops, I have to pull my skirt down. Got to be modest, you know." She saw me looking at her. "You are a very dirty-minded boy, trying to get a glimpse of my panties. I'm going to report your rude behavior to the theater manager."
"Good luck in finding him." He seemed to be absent for most of the day. Then I said, "It would help if you didn't flash yourself like that at me."
Oh man, that was so weak.
I was just about to leave and cut my losses. I said, "Look, I've had enough of this. If you want me to go, then I will."
"No, don't go. I've been such a bad girl, and I'd be surprised if you didn't know how to handle such girls."
I deliberately evaded her statement, "Well, I'm not going to call the police, that's for sure."
"Of course not. If you call the Ryer Avenue precinct over there, they'd just laugh at you."
Yeah, the same as you've been laughing at me.
"Now come on, what have you done in the past to get naughty girls into line? I'm sure you've had some experience with the issue."
I could feel my face warming up and my fingers were twitching; my crotch was tingling. "Since you seem to know everything, why don't you tell me?"
"The way I see it, it would be wrong to smack a woman in the face. But you can give certainly give her a hard whacking on her sassy behind."