On my twenty-first birthday I made a solemn, very private vow. I would not be a virgin by my next birthday.
Although not handsome, I wasn't bad looking. I was 6'2" tall and weighed 180 pounds with blue eyes and shoulder-length brown hair. I wasn't an athlete, but I was in good shape.
My biggest problem was shyness. I'd been one of those skinny little kids with glasses who would rather read than hang out. I didn't do well at parties and I found it almost impossible to strike up conversations. I hadn't done much dating in high school. By the time I worked up the nerve to ask a girl out, she was already taken or wasn't interested.
In 1972, I was in my third year at the University of Wyoming in Laramie, Wyoming's only four-year college, I changed my major from Engineering to Computer Science, which gave me free time. I became friends with Bob and Rich, who lived next door in the dorm. They introduced me to marijuana.
Theatre had always been one of my big interests, so I took theater courses for my required English and Humanities credits. I worked on a number of plays and, with my new-found social life, eventually found myself almost as busy as I had been in Engineering. But I was much happier.
I still wasn't dating in Laramie. When I visited my old friend Larry in Colorado Springs, I'd double date with him, his girlfriend Janna and one of Janna's friends. We'd usually go out on a deserted road, park and smoke some pot. When Larry and Janna started making out in the front seat, it was natural that I'd do the same with the girl in the back seat. Most of the girls let me remove their blouses and lick their breasts. They'd stop me when I made a token attempt to unfasten their pants, but I was amazed they let me go as far as I did.
I still hadn't been able to work up the nerve to ask a girl out myself. I didn't have confidence that I could handle the social part of a relationship. Going out in a group seemed much safer. There was always someone else to fill in the awkward gaps in a conversation.
By my twenty-first birthday, I had realized that the only way I'd acquire any self-confidence would be to meet, date and have sex with a girl on my own.
I went to a casting call for student-directed productions. Someone handed me several pages of script, which I scanned quickly. The dialog was incredibly stilted. I decided it was a silly play, so I gave it a silly reading. By the time the other actors and I had gotten through the scene, we were all close to cracking up.
The director looked at us for a long moment and said, "I should probably tell you something about this play. A family is locked in their house at night and Death is trying to get in to take the father."
Not surprisingly, I didn't get a part in that play. However, one of the other directors saw something he liked in my performance and cast me in "The American Dream," a surreal one act comedy by Edward Albee, author of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolfe".
I don't remember the rest of the cast very well, except for Kathy.
She wasn't strikingly beautiful or spectacularly sexy. She was a dancer and quite athletic, but my first impression of her was "round." She wasn't fat at all, but her body didn't have any sharp angles. Even her rimless glasses with wire temple pieces were round. Kathy's face was sort of ordinary, but it possessed a sweet prettiness that seemed to grow as I spent more time with her. She had straight brown hair hanging down to her waist. Her eyes were green and she was about six inches shorter than me.
We rehearsed three nights a week for a month. With a cast of five plus the director, it was unusual for everyone to be on time. Kathy and I were the most punctual. We usually found ourselves waiting between ten and thirty minutes for the next person to arrive. During the first couple of long waits, we talked about the play and our roles. After that, we just relaxed and talked. Before long, I was arriving early, hoping that Kathy would be on time and the others would be late. Kathy and I lived in the same dorm, so I'd usually walk home with her.
The night of the performance finally arrived. Kathy's role called for her to remove her dress and spend the last half of the play in her shoes and slip. She had the bright idea of wearing a big floppy wide-brimmed hat throughout the performance, which added the perfect comic touch. I'd been looking forward to seeing her in this non-costume and I wasn't disappointed. She was better built than she looked with her clothes on.
We continued seeing each other after the play was over, sometimes studying and other times just hanging out. We were both taking Play Production. We had to create a complete set of materials for producing a play, including a set design, character analysis, blocking instructions and a sample program. Kathy waited until the night before the deadline to finish her project. I stayed with her in the dorm study room until 4:00 am, sometimes helping, but mostly providing moral support.
I walked Kathy to her room. Outside the door, Kathy set her class materials on the floor and turned to face me. "Thank you, Ken," she whispered. "I'd never have finished without you staying with me. I'd invite you in, but my roommate will be sleeping."
Her face was inches from mine and she was gazing into my eyes. She seemed to be waiting for something. I was about to say goodnight and turn away when I realized I'd never have a better chance. I summoned my courage and kissed her.
Kathy kissed me back eagerly. I put my arms around her and pulled her close. Her breasts flattened against my chest. We continued kissing for a long time. I touched my tongue to Kathy's lips. Her mouth opened and her tongue darted against mine.
I slid my hands down her back and cupped her buttocks, pulling her crotch against mine so she could feel my erection. I wanted her to know exactly how much she was turning me on. Kathy responded by wrapping her arms around my back and crushing her chest against mine. She was breathing hard and I could feel her heart pounding.
It seemed like we kissed for hours. There was no indication that Kathy felt like stopping and I knew that I didn't. I wanted to fuck her right there in the hall. The way Kathy was grinding her groin against mine indicated that she wanted it too. I finally pulled my face away from hers and hoarsely whispered, "We really have to get some sleep."