First Time Ch 02 1

FIRST TIME (2) – JAKE’S STORY

My future father-in-law Jait Hoe recounted his early voyeuristic experiences as we sat and sipped beer on the balcony of his house in Sago Lane. Speaking in a matter of fact way, he began his revelations.

“I was raised in Hong Kong. My family lived like packed sardines in a small flat in Sheungwan district. Living conditions at home were not exactly ideal in those early years. My mother was a prolific breeder and when the family grew in numbers, there was the constant need to squeeze every available square foot of floor space in the two room flat to provide the sleeping area for the children. The house furniture had to be sized and arranged to provide more free-living area. And in the evening, the hall was converted into a bedroom for the younger children.”

“I suppose we are not better off here in Chinatown than you were then?” I interjected.

“No, we have more space here. In Hong Kong, space was always a premium and my parents had to cope with what they could afford for that moment. And even when there were finally eight of us, we continued to live in that small apartment unit. Yet we all accepted what we had and were happy as a family. It was many years later before they could afford the luxury of a larger home.” He replied.

“Well, we had six in one room when we were living in my house.” I added.

“My Hong Kong home was just like that, except that the whole flat was not much bigger than your room before. If we called this place a slum, I don’t really know how to describe those housing blocks in Sheungwan.”

“Uncle, even here the crowded housing conditions provide little personal privacy for the occupants. Yours must be much worse then.”

“Very much so. But then, we were all not within the wealth category of those local citizenry who were able to pay the price for privacy in the less densely populated areas of the British colony. In our own neighbourhood, the housing blocks were built close to each other to maximise the plot ratio of the available land area. The residents in each small apartment unit could clearly see through the windows of their neighbours and know what they were doing inside their homes. It was thus common to see thick curtains being used to shield the house interiors from the prying eyes of the neighbours. Especially in the evenings when the family was all at home and the lights were switched on to reveal more of the details of life beyond the windows. Likewise, there was no sound barrier between the neighbouring units because of the poor insulation quality of the walls and the close locations of the units. The occupants thus had to speak in lower voice tones. Except for the older folks. They were less concern about being heard by others and one could always hear their continuous chatters and babbles all day long. However, we were to be oblivious of this lack of personal privacy and adapted well. Even my parents.”

I could sympathise with him for I knew then what crowded living was like, but in any case we were happy and took little notice of our surroundings. Uncle Jake continued to talk and his description became more colourful as I tried to get him to tell me more about his sexual experiences. But he was not in the mood to be rushed, especially as his recollections flashed through his mind.

“As a child those close intimate contacts between members of the immediate family, led me to lose all sense of modesty with my parents at a very young age. And as the only child I had special status amongst the siblings and my parents were more liberal with me. The intimacy that existed between my parents and me was of a more profound level than that achieved between my sisters and my parents. I was the doting child. I was privy to more of the secrets, which existed within the family. And I was never treated as other than the innocent “precious one” who could hear and could see what the other children were not privy to. And with Mum having all the time in the house as the ultimate housekeeper, it was inevitable that I got more familiar with her. Too familiar in fact in this very crowded family home. And under those conditions that I was brought up, I acquired my knowledge on the facts of life from the experiences of my parents at a very tender age.”

His last description led me to expect him to go into details and I blurted out without giving a thought of creating offence to him as my senior, “You mean you made love to your mother?”

“Not exactly. As a married couple, my parents had relatively lesser freedom for expressing themselves to each other at home compared with a couple living in a countryside home in the New Territory. They could not openly display their affection for each other in public or in their own home. They had to adapt to this constraint from the time their children were born. But they did not mind as they were used to similar living conditions when they were young.”

“So you were familiar with what your parents were doing in bed?” I continued to stir our conversation.

“Not exactly. We were perhaps growing up in a fairly westernised home environment even though as a Chinese family, we were taught to be conservative in matters concerning things sexual. However I was quite familiar with the naked forms of my mother and father and also my sisters. Sometimes, it was simply not possible for parents to be modest in front of their own children despite their best possible precautions. And hence it was possible at times for the children to see our parents in less modest coverings in the house. And each of us was also able to accidentally see the other’s body especially as there was only one small bathroom with toilet in the house. But then from an early age, we were not too conscious of each other even though our parents always demanded that we be modest in our behaviour. It was only when the girls reached their puberty and became more aware of the need for modesty that casual contacts between the children became taboo.”

“Did you see them making love?”

“Like any normal married couple, my parents lived an active sexual life. They had to cope with the crammed conditions in the house. Intimate contacts between them were not possible unless the children were all asleep. For them it was very difficult indeed as they had by necessity to share their bedroom with my sister Jane and me. When Mum and Dad made love, they had to use their blanket as a camouflage especially during cooler weather conditions. Love making to them was a discrete activity and done surreptitiously. On most occasions, the only exposed part of the body for the performance of the act was the two essential organs. Fore play was not something, which was considered important, as they had to complete the act quickly. Sex to them was thus more for procreation than for the added value of sensual enjoyment of the bodies. It was only when their wanton desires exceeded their sense of modesty that they would completely disrobe and have a proper duration for love making and copulation. However we children never got to see them during their physical sex.”

My randy feelings increased with his gradual stoking of the fire in his conversation and he could sense that I was all ears for him to talk about how adults made love during his time. But he was in no hurry to rush to a description of what was the ultimate information I wanted to hear.

“However, in the hotter summer months, it was not practical for them to sleep with blankets. Air-conditioning was not a standard feature of our type of housing in Hong Kong in those early days. And as I was to discover in my latter years when my mother told could talk things sexual to me as an adult, my parents had to throw caution to the wind and hope that there was no third pair of eyes to see what they were doing in bed.” He continued.

“I did not know much about what sex was all about until three years ago. And then we moved next door and I haven’t been able to see Dad and Mum making love at night. How old were you when you first find out about the female body?” I offered my piece of information.

“When I was in my puberty years, I became more aware of the human body. I had often seen my parents changing clothes in the bedroom. It strange because as a child, nudity was something so normal until those sex hormones began to change your body. With such an upbringing, I felt no sense of discomfort to see my parents in the nude. However as an Oriental couple, they still tended to be modest and conservative and frequently would only change behind close doors when there was no one around. However, being the only son, I was their pet and hence treated more partially and liberally than the other girls in the family. This led to a very much closer familiarity between me and my parents.”

“I suppose that explains why Hung is also so close to you and her mother. Was your mother very liberal in such things as sex education with you?” I responded in kind.

“With her Chiu Chau upbringing, Mum held old social values and was very sensitive to those things which concerned the human female body. I was to learn from her the extremity of her belief in the curse of the female sexual organs. One day, in trying to help her with the washing, I threw Jane’s dirty underwear into the washing machine. She immediately admonished me.”

Uncle Jake’s eyes lit up as he described the subsequent dialogue with his mother.

“”Jake, don’t put the girls’ panties into the machine. They should not be washed with your father’s clothing.”

“Why not?” I asked in surprise.”

“Because women’s underwear are unclean. They should not be put into the machine to contaminate your father’s clothing. It will bring bad luck to him.””

“But they are the same as mine. They are not dirty or smelly.”

“I don’t mean smelly, dear. I mean unclean because they have been in contact with a girl’s ‘yin po’.”

My mother was one of those very feminine and polite creatures who would seldom like to call a spade as a spade. The female genital was always known by its very correct grammatical form of female section or ‘yin po’.

“I still do not understand. Why, unclean? Are yours also unclean?” I asked very cheekily.

“Yes, I don’t know how to explain to you. Take it from me that these are not good to be washed with men’s clothing. As a boy, you should not touch them. Understand?”

“Is it that only the panty is unclean? What about the dresses?”

“The dresses are okay. But not the panties?”

“What about my brief?”

“It is okay to wash your brief with your father’s clothing.”

“You mean the ‘hai’ makes the panty unclean? Is the ‘hai’ so dirty?”

“Naughty boy. Don’t ever use the word ‘hai’ (cunt) again. Say ‘yin po’.” She admonished me for uttering the Chinese equivalent of cunt.

“Sorry, I did not mean it. Will your ‘yin po’ make your panty unclean, Mum?”

“Yes, the ‘yin po’ makes the panty unclean. Now don’t ask me such embarrassing questions again. Just don’t do it.”

I was deeply puzzled. But in trying to please her, I simply nodded my head.”

At this juncture, I could detect in Uncle Jake a sense of sentimental longing for his early childhood that was tinged with happy recollections. I decided to let him continued with his description of what were happy memories even though I was more keen to know about sex in his home. I added my comparative evaluation of his mother.

“Uncle, from what you said, your mother was as conservative as my Mum is today. My Mum would also not allow the girl’s panties to be washed together with the boys’” But Uncle Jake was not to be distracted by my opinion and continued.

“As a child, I was allowed to snuggle in bed with Mum and Dad. My close bond with Mum especially led to a very close sense of trust and intimacy. I was also close to my sisters, but I always felt that they were different. I was the elder child, but there was relatively little age separation amongst the brood.”

“How was your father attitude towards the children?” I asked in earnest.

“My father had a quiet disposition. He seldom talked to his children, but was quite communicative with Mum in the bedroom. He always talked quietly and softly to her. Sometimes, they would seem to be whispering some secrets to each other and smiling in satisfaction. However, in those days, I could not understand their adult talk. They were talking in riddles. It was much later when I reached your present age that I was able to interpret some of their private communication. Although a man of few words, Dad loved all his children. He had a soft spot for me and normally gave me more presents than the girls. It seemed so unfair, but then I was a boy. I had rarely had a long conversation with Dad even when I grew up as an adult. Perhaps, I feared him. He was so imposing, superior and confident. And he was ever so authoritative.”

“And your mother?”

“Mum’s love was more physical. She was a good housewife and mother. Her closeness to me was beyond doubt. Everything best on the dining table was reserved for me. She was the source of my inspiration and her encouragement propelled me to do well in school. If she was partial to me, it was again because she was brought up with the conventional belief that a family is incomplete without a son. And she was very proud of the fact that she could produce a son for my father. Mum treated me as her special from the time I was born. Until I was six, she frequently bathed together with me. Dad did not find the arrangement unusual, as I was too young to be aware of the need to segregate the sexes in the house. Having her to fondle my body was no shame to me. She was used to washing every part of my body in the bathroom. Likewise, I was used to her naked form. However in those early years, I had no curiosity about the reproductive organs. Although Mum like Dad had a modest covering of pubic hair, it was about the most natural thing in the world for me to see that he had an extended organ while she had a slit between the legs.”

“Did your mother allowed you to see or examine her ‘fa hai’ close-up?” I added an extra touch to his perchance for vulgarity.

“In those early years, when I was lying close to Mum in bed and Dad was not around, I would often touch and explore her breast beneath her blouse. Mum did not like to wear any brassiere at home. Her busts were average in size and have a smooth satin covering of fine skin. I found the feel pleasant and loved to touch her there. Sometimes, I might suck her nipples and she never seemed to mind even though I was past the age for breast-feeding. In fact, she seemed to enjoy having her nipples sucked. She would even tacitly encourage me to behave like her baby when she was lonely especially when Dad was away from home. “

“She must feel very much for you to allow you to behave like a baby at that age?” I added.

“When my third sister was born, Mum chose to breast feed her. During that six-month period of nursing the child, I was also been fed from her breast. It was sheer delight to be able to suck Mum’s milk from her body. I found her willingness to nurse me very satisfying as I was already finding the pressure of competition for her attention from the other children. But she managed to give me the peace and the attention I craved so that I became a less troublesome kid to her then.”

“She was a good mother and must really have loved you a lot. I didn’t know you were so addicted to natural nipples.”

“It has always been that way and Hung’s mother will tell you that I prefer sucking her milk gland to having her worn out ‘fa hai’. But let me continue. More than any of the other children, Mum paid special attention to teach me about life. I learnt more about human living compared with any of my other sisters. And she was such a good teacher and the dearest of mothers. One day, I recalled Mum calling me to watch a fire that was burning a flat in the neighbourhood. Hugging me, she told me that there were fire fighters helping to save people and property. I was scared of the fire. But she was most comforting and with her hugging me to protect me from all danger, I soon learnt about the dangers of playing with fire.”

The dialogue continued in this mood and Uncle Jake was perhaps for the first time able to find someone to listen to what had been in his memory for such a long time. At fifty, Uncle Jake certainly had a good mind as he dished out the details of his early life.

“My mother was the source of my security and inspiration. I recalled that during those early childhood days, I was timid and shy. I was scared of anything that was new. But with gentle coaxing and persuasion, she could make me do things, which I was afraid of doing, and eat those foods, which were strange to my babyish palate. And with her around and showing her example to me, I was able to imitate and to overcome my fear of strangers and also to gain that measure of self confidence which was to characterise my latter life as a man. But my bond with her grew stronger and during my adolescent days, I lived by her apron string. Perhaps it was because of those early conditioning that I saw in my Mum my role model. I relied on her completely and had complete faith and trust in her words. I found that she was always by my side and I became very familiar with every aspects of her character.”

“How old were you when you were able to tell a male from a female?”

“With passage of time, I had growing into a highly talkative and inquisitive child. As I wallowed in my childhood innocence, I was also becoming more conscious of the differences of the male and female bodies and my naive questions to Mum on those subjects were direct and searching. My inquisitiveness became more profound when I reach my puberty. Mum became flustered and flabbergasted as I sought repeated clarifications on the names and functions of her bodily objects. Despite her inborn modesty which caused her to blush whenever she had to articulate those words which had any connection with the female body or has any connection with sex, she nevertheless still tried her level best to answer me honestly. And she could do so without ever giving me any indication that she was uncomfortable with my inquisitiveness. But with the growing recognition that her pet was learning too much of her feminine secrets, she began to avoid casual dressing in front of me. Given my sensitive nature and my over zealous attachment to her, she was forced to adopt a progressive weaning process to avoid upsetting my emotional well being and to ensure that my trust and faith in her remained. She had to preserve her position as the mother whom I had worshipped above all other earthly creatures. Initially when young, she would bathe me and then allowed me to linger outside the bathroom door to wait for her while she tended to the cleansing of her own body. Occasionally, she would still absentmindedly share the shower with me, but the frequency of such combined bathing sessions abated over time.”

“I had never had the experience to bathe with my mother. Hence I am unable to truly see the adult woman’s body even at this age. It explains why you are so experienced with women.” I commented in a matter of fact way.

“Well at that young age, I became very much cognisant of her bodily assets and one day, I asked her about the differences between her possessions and my undeveloped body while she was naked with me in the shower. I could clearly remember that dialogue with her.

“Mum, why are you having hairs here?” I asked interestedly as I goggled at her pubic region.

“Darling these are hairs on a woman’s body?” She answered in her usual good nature self without taking notice of my groping hand.

“But Jane doesn’t have any hairs on this area of her body?” I wondered aloud as I tried to make sense of her reply.

“She is still a child. When she gets older, she will grow black curly hairs on her ‘yin po’.”