Unlike most of her professors, Dr. Redding spoke with enthusiasm. He was clearly passionate about the subject material, and enthusiastic about sharing his knowledge with his freshman class. Just how enthusiastic he could be was something she would come to learn in short order. For now, as the professor lectured, her face remained down while she doodled, one hand covering her brow like a visor. It was all she could do to tune him out. That, and the growing wetness between her legs.
"As you progress through the program and eventually into your residency, you'll become accustomed to patients being nervous, or shy, just as you'll become accustomed to your own nervousness. My advice is to not stress about this process, and to just let things happen naturally. Any questions?"
She hadn't been paying attention to the lecture or the time.
Thank god,
she thought, her face flush with embarrassment as she rose to leave the class.
"Excuse me, would you remain a moment?"
She turned to the professor before glancing around as her other classmates filed out of the room. "Me?" she asked.
"Yes, if you don't mind?"
"Well, I have work right after this, and it's getting late..." She looked outside, the sun having nearly set.
"I couldn't help but notice you were distracted today," Redding said as the last student filed out of the room. This was the last class of the evening, she knew, and soon they would be alone as most of the students left for home or the bar.
"Oh. Maybe. Sorry," she said.
"A lot of students find it hard to adjust at the start of the year. I like to make sure they know I'm available and willing to help with anything that comes up, or with any needs that may arise. How have you been adjusting?" Redding walked around around and casually closed the door at the back of the room before returning to his desk at the front, leaning against the front of it and crossing his arms. His slacks seemed to pull taught against his muscular thighs. The bulge in his pants was noticeable. She swallowed, again that wetness between her legs apparent.
"Fine. No issues, really. Is there something wrong?"
"Not at all. You have a 4.0 this quarter. Normally you're pretty attentive, but today you hardly looked up once. I thought to check in with you since we're half-way through the quarter already. How are you finding the material?"
They'd been studying reproductive systems, and in truth, much of it was new to her. She'd come from a conservative household and a private Catholic school, and neither had ever taught her anything much about how her own body worked, or sex, or what to do with herself when she'd felt aroused, except that anything outside of marriage--even masturbation--was a sin. It was no wonder that when she began to notice Redding she had a hard time focusing.
"It's...fine," she said, fidgeting nervously in her chair. She looked up at him, at his broad chest and handsome features--stubbled chin, blue eyes, shaggy hair. He looked like someone from a shampoo commercial. The front of his shirt was tucked casually into his pants, belt slightly askance as he shifted position, ankles uncrossing and crossing again.
Suddenly aware that her nipples were pressing prominently against her blouse, she pushed her chest forward, unaware of the motion until she made it.
"I don't have a lot of, um...I mean with the material, I don't...I haven't..." she trailed off, catching herself again glancing toward the bulge in his pants before looking quickly away. Was it growing?
"You're a virgin, aren't you? Not much in the way of sex-ed either, I take it?"
She gasped, blushed, felt the heat rise quickly in her chest and throat and, yes, between her legs.
"Don't worry," Redding said, uncrossing his arms and gripping the edge of the desk as he leaned back. "It's just as I said in class: you have to get used to these things, get comfortable talking about sex and bodies and vaginas and erections and ejaculation. If you're not comfortable, then your patients aren't going to be comfortable. As doctors, it's our job to put them at ease."
Redding spoke matter-of-factly, casual, as if he were discussing what to have for dinner. His candor helped put her at ease and she relaxed a little, setting her backpack on the floor next to her desk. Perhaps he was right. Perhaps talking about these things openly and objectively would help put some of her nerves at ease.
"I've never seen a penis," she said, deciding in the moment to
throw herself out there,
as her roommate was constantly encouraging. This was her professor, a man in a position of respect and authority. He could be trusted. She could learn from him. If not him, then whom else? "I've been so focused on studying and working that I haven't had time for a boyfriend, and school is only going to get harder. I guess I'm just worried that by the time I do, the first one I see will be a patient's."
Her professor nodded, seeming to consider what she had said. "And you feel that with your inexperience, your patients won't trust you? That they'll somehow know you're a virgin?"
He was right. She looked from the window and the setting sun outside, turning to acknowledge what he had said, but again her gaze went first to his crotch and for a moment, the words caught in her through.
There
was
a growing erection. She simply nodded, unable to take her eyes off it.
"Look," Redding said, taking a step toward her. "I don't often do this, but I want to help you. I want to make sure you succeed. I can tell your inexperience is really bothering you, and I want to make sure you can put your mind at ease. If you want, I'd be willing to show you mine. I moonlight as a nude model every now and then, so I'm used to this anyway. Would you feel better if you got to see what a penis looked like in real life?"
"Mmmhmm," she said, unable to speak. Was this really happening? Was it unethical?
Deeply unethical,
her mind screamed. And yet, that wetness between her legs, the warmth there...
Redding unbuckled his belt and pushed his pants down. They fell to the floor. His legs were muscular, black briefs skin-tight against the thick chords of muscles in his thighs. A large erection there--six inches? Seven? She couldn't be sure--was apparent.
"I'd show you what a flaccid penis looks like, but one thing you'll learn about men is that they can't often control when they're erect. Just accept it when it happens and everything will come naturally after that. Being a nude model probably helped me more with that than being a doctor, to be honest. Here, I'll show you," he said, pushing his briefs down to the floor. Out sprang his cock, and she gasped.
She had seen a dildo at a sex shop once, but seeing the real thing was something else entirely. He was thick, and well trimmed. A small line of hair rain up his navel. She felt dizzy.
"Notice that I am circumcised," he said, taking another step. He was close now, within reach. She squirmed in her seat, again aware of her erect nipples, the wetness between her legs, heat in her neck and chest.
He continued.
"If I were not," he said, taking his cock in his hand and moving it so she could see it from another angle, "a layer of foreskin would conceal the head of my penis, and it would retract as I entered my partner, or masturbated."
She could smell his cologne. Faint, earthy. Sandalwood, maybe, or vanilla.
"You've never performed oral sex before, have you?"
She shook her head.
"Give me your hand."
He reached for her, and, head spinning, heart pounding, she took it. Gently he guided it to his thick, bulging shaft, and wrapped her fingers around it.
"Like this," he said, his hand still around hers. He began to guide her hand up and down his shaft, up and down, slowly.
"When your partner becomes aroused like this, it's good to start things off with your hands. It's okay to take your time at this point. There's no rushing foreplay. Especially as a virgin, you want to make sure you're going slowly."
