Breaking Free Ch 1

When someone finds the courage to confide in you, it is difficult not to overstep the margin of becoming emotionally involved. The rules are there for a purpose, but if you find yourself trapped by the innocent attraction of another human's pain, how do you escape? There is a shimmer at the end of the tunnel, which needs to be realized.

It all began while I worked at an east coast university. A normal day, filled with numerous visits from both staff and students wanting this, wanting that. That was until I shouted quite irritatingly for the person to enter. The door opened slower, almost hesitantly. I looked over my half-rimmed glasses and watched as Lucy, one of my administration staff, entered unsurely.

"Hi, Professor, sorry to disturb you," she stammered, her eyes deviated doubtfully to the floor.

"Come in child, what can I do for you?"

"I-I don't know…" she broke down suddenly.

"Close the door and sit down," I said trying to hide the irritation from my voice. 'Probably just another broken heart or unwanted pregnancy', I thought.

"I…Jennifer told me to speak to you," she said hesitantly.

"Well, I suppose you're not here on a social visit. Why don't you start from the beginning?" I folded my arms and leaned back into the chair.

"I…," she sank back in her chair as I interrupted her.

"Remember one thing, don't lie to me, and don't hide anything. If you want me to sit here and listen to you, and help you, I need to know the truth, understand?" I said sternly.

"Well Professor, you see- I can't respond to him. I feel ashamed and I know he is getting more and more frustrated. It has created a deadlock on our relationship. At times, he would just lie there, ignoring me completely. I suppose in a way, I can't blame him, but I do try really hard. It is as if he has given up completely," she started to cry.

"I understand Lucy, but have you discussed the problem with him? Have you explained to him why?" I asked stroking her long dark hair.

"I tried, I really tried, but it is so difficult. I don't even know what the problem is. I have even attempted to give him- oral sex, but he never got any pleasure out of it." Lucy sobbed.

"Wait now Lucy," I comforted her, "let's concentrate on you first. You have to understand that men, or should I say, some men need to feel that there is value to their efforts. They need to know that they are making an impression with almost everything they do. It is their egotistically aim to see a result which can boost their own selfish wellbeing."

"I don't understand," she wiped away her tears and sniffled, "I always thought that it did not matter what the woman feels, whether she…orgasm or not. My mother…"

"That's your problem, Lucy," I interrupted. "Somewhere along the line, your mother has managed to influence you because of her own misfortunes. This has wrapped your own inner-self with chains of guilt, not only towards men, but also towards sex."

"What should I do, Professor, how will I ever overcome this?" Lucy leant forward, tears streamed down her face, staining my shirt.

"It is all up to you, Lucy. I can help you if you want, but than I need you to trust me," I said.

She looked up, her makeup have left dark streaks round her large eyes. "You'll help me? Please Professor, I will be so happy, I will do anything. I just want to, for once in my life, feel something."

"Slow down, Lucy, I don't know if you realize what it is I expect from you."

"What do you mean, Professor?" Her eyes were quizzical, yet excited.

"Hold on," I said and got up. I walked over to the door and locked it. Turning around, I looked into her questioning eyes. I sat down again and took her hands into mine. Lucy, for me to help you I need your full cooperation and mostly your trust. Do you understand?"

"Yes Professor, I understand..."

"There is a difference between understanding, trust and cooperation, Lucy. You have to realize that you will have to put your full trust in me and most importantly, in yourself as well. Do you think you can do that?"

"Yes Professor, I think I can. I am desperate enough to trust just about anyone now, especially you." Her eyes, filled with determination as she squeezed my hands.

"Okay, stand up," I ordered. "First, let's see how far you're prepared to go to help yourself."

Lucy rose slowly, her flowery summer-dress swayed loosely around her slim body. The v-neck revealed a hint of white lacy-material covering her small breasts. I led her to the large mahogany cabinet in the corner of the office. With one hand, I opened one of the doors, revealing a full-sized mirror.

I stepped behind her and placed my hand on her shoulders. "Okay Lucy, first I want you to look at yourself," I whispered softly against her ear, "I want you to discover your own beauty first. Look into your big brown eyes, see their passion, feel their warmth."

She breathed deeply as I ran my hands along her exposed arms. Her body leaned warmly into mine.

"Now, look at your mouth, your lips. Do you see their fullness, their warmth?"

"Yes, I see," she whispered.

"Lick them, taste them," I coaxed her.

Her tongue darted hesitantly across her lips. She watched with renewed interest as the pink tip of her tongue followed the contours of her moist lips. The vision of this simple act caused an unknown sensation within her chest, making her breathe deeply again.

"That's it, just relax, and breathe slowly. You are doing well," I said as I slid my hands over her shoulders, caressing them lightly up-to the smoothness of her long neck.

"You see, that wasn't so bad. I want you to be totally relaxed before I continue, okay Lucy?"

"Yes, Professor, I am okay." She continued to breathe slowly as her tongue slithered more frequently across her moist lips.

She paused briefly as I tugged on the zip behind her neck. Slowly, I pulled the zip-catch downwards towards the small of her back. Her eyes widened briefly, but she did not attempt to stop or question me. I felt a faint stirring in my own crotch where the firmness of her buttocks rested lightly.

"You have such a beautiful body, Lucy," I said, I sliding both my hands onto the bare flesh of shoulders.

"My boyfriend…"

"Stop, Lucy. Remember, we're not concerned about your boyfriend here. It is you we're trying to take care of first. I want you to see yourself as others do. How can you expect other people to love and respond to you if you can't do it yourself?"

"But I am so plain looking. I wish I had blonde hair and bigger breasts. I will trade my body any day for one of those beach-babes on…"

"Lucy, it doesn't matter what your body looks like, the main thing is, if you can't love yourself, and enjoy yourself, no other physical attribute is going to change that. We have to except the way we look, only then can we feel good about ourselves. Can you understand that?"

"Yes, Professor," she sighed as she leaned her head against my chest.

"Let's see what you look like," I said as I slid her dress over her shoulders. "You have such an aristocratic looking neck, long and slim, very inviting to be touched, to be kissed." I slid her dress further down her arms to around her waist, exposing her small laced-covered breasts.

Lucy shivered as the cool air caressed her exposed flesh. Her mind raced as she tried to understand these unfamiliar sensations, spreading uncontrollably through her trembling body. She tried to find sense in what was taking place. The awkwardness of her standing in front of a mirror, being 'forced' to look at her own body, a body she had been living in for the last twenty-six years. A mere transportation device for her soul, kept a stranger from her inner-self, dividing her eternal existence between the sinfulness of pleasure and survival of her soul.

Constantly, her mother would lecture on the merciless wrath that might befall her if she ever attempted, either by her mind or own hand, to explore such wicked and unholy territory. She struggled endlessly during her puberty years with these unrelenting temptations, denying herself the answers to these forbidden sensations, forcing them with great difficulty from her mind. Right up to the age of twenty, the year her mother died, she had never been with a man, never as much felt a hand or another pair of lips on her. She was shy, afraid, and withdrawn. She could not even undress in front of other girls in her dormitory whilst at university.

However, here she is now, her body melting against the body of her mentor, guiding her towards the liberation of her bonds. She hesitated slightly, waiting for the pounding in her chest to slow down as she took deep breaths. His burning hands are on her bare skin, touching, yet not touching.

"You really do have nice breasts, Lucy," I whispered again. "They're perfect for your slim body, look at their shape. They look little ripened pears, ready to be plucked."

She stared for a while at first, not sure what she was looking at. She noticed the darkness of her areolas through the thin lacy material. To her, they were mere unnecessary appendages, which only subjected her to pain, another reason her friends constantly teased her about.

She stiffened as she felt my hands brushing against her skin to the centre of her chest.

"Just relax, and remember, breathe. I will stop if you want me to." I waited silently, keeping my fingers on the clasp between her breasts.

Her body relaxed again as she took another deep breath. "I'm okay. I just…"

"Don't explain to me Lucy. You don't have to explain to anyone. This is your body, you can do with it what you want, and when you want to. Do not let anyone control it. It belongs to you, understand?" I emphasized.

"Yes Professor, I think I do," she said bravely.

"Say it. Tell me that it belongs to you. Tell yourself!"

"This body belongs to me," she said softly.

"Say it again, louder."

"This is my body," she said with an edge of passion.

"Good, you're doing well, let's continue." My fingers worked on the clasp of her bra. I pulled the two cups away slowly and slid the bra down her arms. I watched as her nipples started to protrude from her milky white breasts. "They are so beautiful, Lucy. Can you see that?"

"Yes, Professor-"

"Call me Dan."

"Yes, Dan."

"Your skin is so smooth, I bet they are quite firm," I said as I cupped one.

She inhaled sharply, her body tensed. "Relax, Lucy. I want you to touch them, feel their smoothness, and feel their warmth. Nothing is going to happen, I promise you. These are yours to enjoy as much as you want."

I took hold of her hands and placed them over her breasts. "That's good, Lucy. How does it feel?"

"It's…different," she whispered. Her hands moved hesitantly upon her breasts. She flushed as she realized just how much she enjoyed feeling their firmness, yet softness. Her fingers squeezed more firmly, eliciting a sharp sensation to surge down her spine.

I squeezed more firmly over her hands, massaging deeper into her firm flesh. Her breathing increased markedly as she leaned hard against my chest. Manipulating my fingers around hers, I clamped her own around her now swollen nipples.

"Oh, Dan- what's happening to me? I am…," she said with a rasping voice.

"Don't fight it, Lucy. Go with it; close your eyes and just let it flow through you like a warm breeze in a hot summer's night." I whispered. Her writhing body against mine caused a familiar stirring between my thighs. I released her hands and slid mine slowly down her waist. "Don't stop, Lucy, you are allowed to enjoy the feeling. Get to know your body; get to know what you like."

With her eyes shut, her tongue darted feverishly across her dry lips as she breathed faster. I got hold of the thin material around her waist and slowly pushed her dress over her thighs, revealing a pair of old-fashioned cotton-panties. Lucy watched horrified as her dress slid further down to pool around her ankles. Her thighs, pale like her breasts, were slim, leaving a clear valley underneath a shadowy mound.

The sudden realization of her exposed vulnerability brought forth an unnerving, yet thrilling emotion, causing her body to tremble as her breathing became raspy. What is happening to me? She thought.

She watched as her stomach muscles went taut. The feeling of those hands burned her skin, teasing, enticing her further, and taking her to a place she had never gone before.

My hand travelled lower, brushing against the darkened triangle towards the valley of her thighs. I felt the spongy feeling of her pubic bush hidden underneath her skin-colour panties. Her body stiffened suddenly as my fingers dipped inwards between her thighs. She kept her eyes closed. Could it be fear, fear of her journey into the unknown?

She inhaled sharply as I cupped her mound more firmly. "That's it my pigeon, let it go. Don't hold back," I whispered softly against her ear. I felt the contours of her mound against the palm of my hand. Gently, I laid a finger across her crotch, searching for that familiar warmth between her folds. There it is! The evidence of dampness started to filter through the cotton material.

"Prof- Dan…I can't…please!" She grabbed my hand, but did not attempt to remove it. She kept her eyes closed, her red streaked breasts heaved up and down.

"Just breathe, Lucy, I won't do anything you are not ready for. Just relax," I said as I took her hand gently from behind and slowly guided it where mine had rested before. "You have nothing to fear. This is quite normal. Feel your desires flow from your body."

I felt her fingers moving underneath mine, exploring. Her body shook involuntarily, her eyes opened wide as her fingers discovered her secret nub.

"I think that's enough for today," I said before she could react. "Best we end on a high note." I kissed her cheek before bending down to retrieve her dress and bra.

After I helped her to get dressed, I asked, "So how do you feel?"

She thought for a moment, "Fine…confused, it felt so strange. I'm still not sure what I felt, but there was something which I have never experienced before."

"Lucy, it's all up to you. If you would rather not continue, I understand, but I think you are doing just great. Soon you will discover a completely new world out there. Soon you will break free from guilt and start to live a new life. All you have to do is to trust yourself and just let go. Do you think you can do that?"

"Yes, Dan. I do, because I trust you. When should…"

"Whenever you're ready, Lucy, it's all up to you," I answered, "but let's not rush it. Why don't you go to town, have break, think about what you feel. We need to be careful, I would hate if some of the staff might sense something. They won't understand and I don't want the tongues to start waggling, understand?"

"Yes, I do. What time should we meet?" Her eyes stared back at me with a hint of braveness.

"Let's say, five o' clock in the afternoon, when most of the staff has left, okay?"

"That's good," she said with a faint smile and turned to walk towards the door.

"You sure have a beautiful body, Lucy."

"Thanks, Dan," she muttered shyly and left.

***

The following day, I did not see Lucy at all. Jennifer, one of Lucy's assistants, told me later that Lucy left a message saying that she might be in later that day. Something, a faint glint in her eyes, and the way she said it, raised my suspicion that she new more than she should.

"Thanks Jennifer, I hope it is not serious?" I asked concerned.

"Oh-no Dan, she is due a couple of days off. You know her; she has always been so conscientious about her work that she never even took a day off sick. I am surprised myself, maybe it's something to do with a new man," she winked.

"Well, I wouldn't know, Jen," I mumbled, feeling my face go scarlet.

"Well, well, well," Jennifer said slowly. She closed the door and sat down on the visitors chair in front of my desk. Crossing her slim legs seductively, she asked, "Dan, did Lucy come to see you yesterday?"

"What do you mean?" I asked innocently.

"Come-on, you know what I mean. Lucy and I are very good friends. We speak a lot, and I mean a lot. I just want to know how much she has told you about herself. She does have some…problems. I told her to speak to you. Apart from that, I knew she was here yesterday."

"She told you?" I felt my heart race.

"Dan, you are not listening. What I am saying, is that we speak often. I suggested she comes to see you, seeing that you are a man. I doubt, being a woman, if I would have been able to help her at all."

"Help her with what?" I played stupid.

"Don't be patronizing, Dan. I thought that you would be able to help her come to terms with her sexuality, help her to understand that sex is not such an evil thing."

"Okay, you're right. She did come to speak to me yesterday," I relented.

"So, my ears didn't lie to me then," she smiled while she swept a red hair-lock from her face, "I thought I heard a bit of, deep-breathing going on."

Jennifer uncrossed her legs, giving me a clear view of her red, sheer panties. She deliberately kept her knees apart, a wicked smile played on her freckled face. I felt my mouth go dry, somewhere behind my prostrate, the pressure started to increase.

"You were spying on her?" I asked sternly.

"Yes, I was. Lucy asked me to stay close. She was very nervous. Don't worry, I found it quite exciting. I almost came in to join, but I masturbated instead," she said huskily, her hands ran along the side of her stocking-clad thighs, shifting her skirt higher.

I felt my manhood spring to life and stood up, not breaking eye contact with her. Her tongue flurried nervously across her moist lips as I stood beside her.

"That was very bad of you, to spy on your friend, and even more so, to spy on me. I think you need to be taught a lesson," I tested.

"What are you going to do, sack me?" Her eyes looked at me daringly.

"Oh-no, that will be too easy a punishment, and besides, you are doing a good job."

"Thanks for the complement, but…"

"Stand up!" I ordered.

Jennifer stood up slowly; her green eyes were slightly larger.

"Bend over the table, now!" I said, not giving her a chance to answer.

She bent her upper body over the table and rested on her elbows.

"I don't want to hear another sound out of you, shake your head if you understand," I ordered.

She nodded her head nimbly. I walked over, locked the door, and stood behind her. Jennifer shrieked as I landed my hand with a sting on her buttock.

"That was for spying on me," I said while caressing her buttock, "which is not such a big sin, but getting pleasure out of it," I smacked her again, "was totally selfish. While your pussy was all wet, I had a very painful erection, of which I could do nothing about."

"I am sorry, Dan. Please forgive me, I will do anything, as Long as you stop being angry at me," she said with excitement in her voice.

Well, let's see how much you are prepared to do," I said as I took hold of the hem of her skirt. Slowly, I pulled her skirt around her hips, exposing her panty-clad bottom. I squeezed both her cheeks, feeling my cock throbbing painfully inside my pants. I ran my fingers along the cleft of her arse until I reached her hanging mound.

"Mm, you are soaking wet," I said as I stroked her.

Jennifer strained to lift her arse higher, spreading her legs wider. A disappointed sigh escaped her lips as I stopped my fondling. I walked around the desk to face her.

"No, stay where you are, we are not finished yet," I commanded while I undid my pants.

She watched in anticipation as I lowered my pants over my solid hard cock. A tiny drop of sperm glistened in the dimly lit office. I grabbed her red bushy-hair with one hand and placed the head of my cock against her lips.