Beckies Purity Ring

My neighbors' daughter is pregnant mostly because of me. Beckie lost her virginity and conceived her first child while babysitting for me.

I am a single mom with a toddler whose father is not part of our lives. I decided to move back to my home town a few months before Beckie graduated from high school.

When I moved into our new neighborhood, Beckie came by my house looking for babysitting work, so I decided to hire her. Her parents are really strict. Even at 18, she was very sheltered and not allowed to date or wear makeup. She even had a purity ring. If you don't know, that is a ring girls in the Bible Belt wear to pledge abstinence until marriage.

I decided it would be fun to be a "bad" influence on Beckie.

I got my chance when I came home one night and found her on my sofa kissing a boy.

She was terrified that I would tell her parents. That was the exact opposite of what I had in mind. Her purity ring was just the sort of challenge that would make it fun for me to help her blossom as a sexually active young woman.

I decided to have a little talk with each of them separately. I walked him to my back door but insisted she wait on the sofa for some girl talk.

Once he and I were in the garage, I closed the door behind us and reassured him that I was not angry about the kissing. His eyes got big when he heard what I said next. "I am just sorry I interrupted you. Teens need a safe place to have sex. I will try to make sure I don't surprise you again so you and Beckie can have plenty of time alone together to explore your bodies and get comfortable having sex."

He was a nice boy, so he tried to protest that they were just kissing. I laughed and told a little white lie. "I know, that's the problem. Beckie's told me she wants to have sex with you and is getting frustrated because you are going too slow. She needs you to take the lead because she is too shy."

I could see the next question from a mile away. "What if she gets pregnant?"

I laughed. "Grownups scare you about pregnancy just to keep you from getting a disease. Beckie is a virgin, and you get to be her first. Don't ruin it by using a condom. I'll talk to her about her period and make sure it's a time she can't get pregnant. Come back tomorrow night, and I'll make sure she's ready."

The poor kid was so nervous he turned around and ran home.

Beckie was sitting on the sofa, as white as a ghost. I sat down next to her, and we had a long conversation that night about how having sex was healthy and normal for an 18 year old with a boyfriend. I explained that part of being old enough to have a boyfriend meant having a plan for how and when to safely have sex instead of pretending it wasn't going to happen.

I told her I was having sex at her age and that most girls who claimed to be virgins were just lying and that parents lied to teenagers about sex just to scare them.

She tried to argue with me, but I told her that if she was going to act like a child instead of a woman, then I would have to talk to her parents instead. That got her quiet really quickly.

I could tell that she was afraid of what it would feel like for him to penetrate her. She was about to graduate from a small bible school, had never even used a tampon or had a gynecological exam, and knew nothing about sex beyond the basic mechanics. She was really curious.

I took her to women's magazine websites for a crash course on sex. She was embarrassed at first but within a few minutes I could tell she was getting aroused.

Next came the samd questions as her boyfriend about pregnancy. I mentioned planned parenthood, but she was way too shy even to think about getting and using birth control. She was strongly opposed to the idea of getting on birth control.

I was beginning to think I had hit a dead end when she asked about natural family planning.

I saw my opportunity. I explained about how most women are fertile for only a few days each month and why it is impossible to get pregnant as long as you keep careful track of your periods. She seemed really interested. I took a very serious tone and told her that counting the days of her cycle worked well as contraception ONLY for women who had enough discipline to always take precautions on their fertile days. She said she understood.

I had thought I would just get her laid, but a baby belly would be the perfect match for her purity ring.

It was getting late, so I asked her to come back to babysit again tomorrow night and said that I would give her and her boyfriend plenty of time to be alone.

I wasn't quite sure how much progress I had made, but I had given her a lot to think about.

The next day when she came over she showed me a cycle tracking calendar on the website for a tampon brand. She said she wanted me to make sure she was "using it right."

I gave her a big smile. "First, let's talk about what you want to use for birth control when you have sex during your fertile days." I asked her, "What contraception do you want to use when you are ovulating?"

She looked at me with an expression of panic and shook her head no. "I don't want to," she said softly.

"Look," I said. We talked about this yesterday. If you can't have a grownup conversation about sex, then I am going to have to call your mom. What birth control do you want to start so you won't get pregnant?"

It was obvious she would not change her mind. "I'm sure. I don't want birth control."

I knew she was still sticking to the idea of not having sex at all, but she was so naive that I was pretty sure I could get her to tell me she wanted my help to get pregnant without her even realizing what she was saying.

"Well, you are showing me a family planning calendar. Are you trying to plan fertility or contraception?"

She gave me a confused look.

"When you are fertile, do you intend to use any form of contraception?"

"No. I just want to know what my body is doing."

"You have no interest in contraception?"

"No. None."

"Okay. We'll look at you cycle and find the best days for you to have sex." She didn't even ask what I meant.

We looked at the calendar she had opened on her phone. She said her cycle was usually between 21 - 25 days, so I told her to put in 23 days and the date her last period began to get her predicted ovulation date. She was "pretty sure" she was "around" day 7 or 8, in other words right about two weeks before her next period since her cycle was so short.

I expected the website calendar to show that with such a short cycle she already was in her fertile window, but it turned out the calendar didn't work at all. It put her expected ovulation at day 14, just like you would expect for a much longer 28 day cycle.

I gave her a big hug. "Tonight is perfect timing for you to have unprotected sex!"

I was choosing my words carefully. The utterly unreliable website calendar said she was safe. I knew she was not. This was going to be fun.

Her response was priceless. She turned completely white and hardly could get a word out at first. She was so nervous she was shaking like a leaf.

Fortunately her boyfriend was already planning to come for a visit. I grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her upstairs and made her help me make up the guest bed and get out some scented candles. I put out a bottle of lubricant, too, and put a little gift wrap bow on it and placed it on the nightstand. She kept arguing she didn't want to have sex, but I just ignored her.

At least she didn't notice my box of condoms in the same drawer with the lubricant. I made sure to hide the condoms before I left.

She was way beyond cold feet — she was terrified. I knew she would put up a defense if she had the chance.

I told her to give my toddler her bath. I figured she'd get soaking wet, but to make sure I put a plastic cup in the tub for my toddler to play with. By the end of bath time she was soaked through, so I gathered up all of her clothes while she was toweling off and told her I would give them a spin in the dryer to get them dry quickly before her boyfriend showed up. I threw them in the washer instead.

I gave her a t shirt that did not even reach mid thigh to wear "until the dryer finished." I also hid her phone.

She was frantically looking for her phone to text her boyfriend so he wouldn't come over. She told me again and again she wasn't ready to have sex yet. I tried to reassure her, but she was getting really agitated. She was so sweet arguing with me.

She had no idea how right she really was that she absolutely should not have sex that night. But by this point I was determined to see my plan through.

She was a lot bigger than me up top, and my t shirt did nothing to conceal the fact she was braless. As she stood there trying to persuade me to help her find her phone, her breasts were jiggling with every gesture. I was confident that it wouldn't matter how many times she told her boyfriend no to sex tonight. When he saw her in that t shirt, his teenage hormones would never give her even a chance.

She was so nervous I was afraid she might not unlock the door, so I gave her two Xanax (I told her they were aspirin) and took her upstairs to lie down.

I finished getting ready to go out and then checked on her. She was sleeping on her side with her knees pulled up. I gently pulled up her t shirt so that her body from the navel down was on full display. He was going to get quite an eyeful.

I turned down the light, lit the candles, and left her door open when I went downstairs.

I encountered him arriving as I was leaving. I told him Beckie was waiting for him upstairs.

I was right about his teen hormones. When I came home, Beckie reeked of sex and was lying naked and curled up on the guest bed.

She blushed deeply when I asked how it felt to become a woman.

I noticed that someone had rummaged through my bathroom drawers. I was really glad I had hidden my condoms.

I wish I could say she was really enthusiastic about having sex again after that first night, but I had to call her mom and insist she come over to babysit to get her back the next day, and once she was at my house I had to demand her phone and text her boyfriend myself (pretending to be her of course) to invite him to come over.

She was having second thoughts about contraception too, and apparently her boyfriend had gotten up the courage to buy condoms, so I gave her a big lecture on how important it is to lubricate for condoms to feel good for both of them. I decided to change out my lubricant with baby oil to make sure they had something really slippery.

When I came home later that night I asked her how she liked using condoms, and she said they kept breaking so they just gave up and did it without protection. She was really dripping between the baby oil and his semen, so I showed her how to insert a menstrual cup to keep everything inside her,

Unfortunately, I don't think she ever actually had an orgasm and never really got over her shyness. To be honest, I think he had a lot more fun than she did. But she did get pregnant.

Now the purity ring is gone, and she has the cutest baby bump. Her boyfriend's parents said they would pay for an abortion but not a wedding, but an abortion was out of the question for her. I am sure she will be a wonderful mommy.