A New Perspective

I had slept well in the aftermath of our lovemaking last night. Being an early riser, I went downstairs to put on the coffee and looked out the kitchen window to see the first snowfall of the season. The sun was just coming up, giving texture to the snow sculpted and etched by the wind and cover for the muted browns and greys of November. It looked cold.

I shivered a bit, picked up my tablet to read the news and waited for the coffee to finish brewing. Leslie wandered down about fifteen minutes later in her pajamas still a bit sleepy and disheveled. I was just pouring myself a cup as she shuffled her way into the kitchen. I got her a cup as well which elicited a groggy 'thanks' while she grabbed her phone to begin flipping through email.

We didn't say much as we waited for the caffeine to lift the fog.

"So. About last night. You okay?", I asked.

Leslie looked up. "Yeah".

She took another sip of her coffee and then added after another moment, "I hope you had fun. That it was what you wanted."

"Yeah, I guess it was, but...".

I hesitated.

"I don't think it was what you wanted. Was it?"

"Well, I enjoyed it because you did", she replied.

"It wasn't something I wanted for me but it ended up being more fun than I expected."

And then, smiling mischievously, she added, "And, how are you feeling? Walking straight?"

I laughed and nodded yes. While I could certainly tell that Leslie had fucked me well with the large dildo, I wasn't sore or feeling raw. Instead, what I felt was a pleasant reminder of our lovemaking last night.

Leslie became more serious. "Chris, I need to know you still want and desire the woman in me, just as I still want you as a husband."

I sighed and looked down at the floor. "I'm sorry I gave you any reason to ever doubt that. I really do love and desire you, Leslie. So very much."

She continued, "I was...let's say 'surprised' at how you swallowed my dildo. Shocked really. I mean, it's a lot bigger than you are. I certainly couldn't do it but you deep-throated it. That's not a beginner-level skill."

"You said you practiced on my other dildo. You must have practiced a lot."

I again took my eyes to the floor to avoid her gaze as I nodded with embarrassment. "I certainly couldn't at first. But I wanted to know what it was like. To see if I could. So I worked at it."

Leslie nodded thoughtfully. "Can I ask you why?"

I gave this some thought.

"It's kind of hard for me to describe. I suppose it's the taboo nature of it."

I took another sip of my coffee and continued.

"I think it's probably obvious that most guys want to be deep-throated. To be taken all the way, because it feels really good. It's like when we make love. I want to be as deep into you as I possibly can. I can't help it."

"But there's more to it than that. There's kind of a psychology to it. We want to be taken all the way because we want you to be hungry for it. Hungry for me. Nothing seems sexier to guys than to have someone going to town on us out of their own lust."

"It's great that you want to do it for us, to deep throat us because you know we want you to. But it's way better if you want to do it for you."

"Like when I go down on you. I love your fragrance and taste, and the sight of you, to feel you quiver under my lips. I love everything about it. Everything."

"I love that you enjoy it and I want to do it for you. But I also love doing it for me. It excites me in so many ways. The first few times I went down on you before we married, I was so turned on I almost came without touching myself. It still turns me on like crazy."

"I think many guys, maybe more than either of us would guess, even supposedly 'straight' guys are curious about what it's like to be on the giving end, too. You already know that was me. I couldn't get it out of my mind and I wondered what it was like. And I never thought I would experience the real thing."

"Well, since I was imagining it anyway, I wanted to go as far as I could, to see if I could take it all the way. The salaciousness and taboo nature of doing it kept me at it until I could. Which, to be honest, was pretty thrilling when I finally did it."

"In any case, that must have been quite a shock for you. I'm sorry about that."

Leslie nodded, seeming to understand, and asked, "How long have you been curious about cock?"

"For about the past 10 years or so. I don't know when exactly. There wasn't some specific moment. I guess I started to become curious as I watched you going down on me. It felt so good. And I thought it looked kind of fun. I started to wonder what it was like and became more curious the more I thought about it. I guess I'm a bit orally fixated."

"Chris? Was Halloween night the only time you've actually done it? Be honest with me."

"Leslie. I promise that was the only time. And it will be my only time. I'm so sorry. It was a betrayal. I won't do that to you again."

She nodded her acceptance of my answer at face value.

After another minute, Leslie, looking down at her phone, quietly asked, "Can I assume you demonstrated your skill Halloween night?"

The question stung, though I'm not sure she meant it that way. It was still raw and her trust, which was so easy to lose, might be hard to gain back.

I nodded. "I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry, Leslie. And that it won't happen again."

She got up to go to the other room and refill her coffee cup. She didn't come back directly and I didn't want to chase her so she could have space.

After a few minutes, she came back and we were quiet for a while.

"I'm okay, Chris. Still in a bit of shock about things. Processing. But okay."

"Oh, and by the way, I invited Charlene over for dinner tonight."

Charlene, being Leslie's best friend and now single, was a frequent guest for dinner. She's fun, unpredictable, and sassy. She and I had become fairly close, too. But, I had some lingering questions after Charlene's comment at the Halloween party.

Dinner was delicious and the conversation playful, aided by a nice bottle of wine. Leslie is a really good cook and I'm a decent helper. I got up to do the dishes and Charlene helped clear the table as Leslie was finishing her wine.

As Charlene and I were loading the dishwasher, she said "What a fun party that was for Halloween!"

I replied with a smile and a nod but didn't say anything, as my mind went back to the dark room.

"Oh come on, Chris. Surely you two enjoyed it. And both your costumes were fantastic!"

"It was a great party," was all I offered as I continued loading dirty dishes. I wasn't sure how to reply, given all that had happened.

"I said I was sorry," she offered.

I was a bit surprised she remembered as she had had quite a few drinks by that time.

"I know. It's fine."

"But I loved your costume, Chris. It was perfect!"

I turned to her and said, "Do you remember when you asked if I was wearing panties and then said 'I thought so'? What did you mean? They were part of my costume."

Charlene just looked at me as she considered her words and then said, "Well I guess..., I mean it wasn't really a surprise. You often wear them, don't you? Even now."

I looked at Charlene, and then at Leslie who was still enjoying her wine and now spectating with great interest to see where this was going to go.

"Why do you say that?", I asked.

Charlene stalled, glancing at Leslie, and then said, "Well, I can kind of tell."

"What?"

"Well, they sometimes show through your pants. I would never tell anyone else!", she quickly added.

I just stared at her, considering this revelation.

"C'mon Chris. We're good friends. We hang around a lot. You have a cute butt which I like to look at. I can see the outline of your panties underneath your jeans. Not always, but often. I mean, tell me I'm wrong."

I didn't say anything as I processed the information.

She continued, "There's a distinct line across your butt from the gusset. But, I like it - It's sexy!", she offered. "And, I would have loved it if my ex wore panties. It would have been fun and it might have helped with his anger issues. We might still be together. That asshole!"

I looked over at Leslie who just smiled, shrugged, and took another sip of her wine while enjoying the show. She probably wanted popcorn, too.

I returned to loading the dishwasher. Charlene, noticing my discomfort said, "It's okay Chris. It's more than ok - I think it's awesome!" And, then a bit louder so Leslie would be sure to hear, she added, "And your wife should share - we could have a lot of fun, the three of us!", she said laughingly.

My face flushed as I continued doing the dishes. Charlene's comment was enough to get Leslie up to join in the fun.

"Why, Charlene. Are you suggesting that I share my panty boy?", she drawled while draping an arm around my waist to then squeeze my butt.

Charlene, not missing a beat, said "It's been too long since I've had sex of any kind. I'd jump at the chance if I could get into either of your panties! Imagine the fun we'd have if we were all wearing a matching set!"

Leslie was clearly caught off guard by this turn in the conversation and looked at Charlene speechless.

Charlene, sensing that she might have revealed too much, backpedaled and said, "I was just kidding!", and leaned in to give Leslie a peck on the cheek. Returning to the dishes, she added, "Although I think the idea of secret matching panties is a good one!"

I was embarrassed but began to get an erection so I turned back to the dishes hoping to conceal the evidence.

Over breakfast the next day, Leslie said, "I'm heading out to get a massage. I must have pulled something a bit when we were fooling around. Turns out pegging you takes some work!", laughed Leslie. She then added, chuckling, "Hopefully I'll get myself into shape with more...practice."

"In any case, I set up an appointment with Scott a few weeks ago and it's timely. You should consider going sometime, too, given that your back has been bugging you."

"Yeah, that probably would help. Let him know I'll be calling to set something up."

Leslie arrived at the studio and headed to the room after being greeted by Sandi at the front desk. Having done this many times before, she was comfortable with the process and stepped out of her clothes, draped herself in the towels, and laid down on the table.

"Hi Leslie!", said Scott as he walked into the room. "Great to see you again! So, what am I working on today?", he asked.

"Probably just all over, Scott. But, I also have some tightness in my lower back and hamstrings."

"Let's take a look", he said as he applied some oil to his hands and rubbed them together to spread the oil and warm them up. He then started his work at her shoulders before working his way down her back.

"Yeah, you are a bit tight in places. But, no worries. I'll get 'em worked out."

Leslie loved these massages, luxuriating in the experience as she felt her muscles relax, the tightness and tension melting away.

Being a private person and not liking to be an exhibitionist, she would dress modestly when out in public. However, a massage is an intimate activity and often involves touching areas very near to erogenous zones. And, the border to those zones can be fuzzy.

But Scott was a licensed massage therapist, highly skilled, and a complete professional. Though he had seen most of her naked, she had no worries. He had always been businesslike in his touch, never taking liberties.

She thought about this as he continued to rub down her hamstrings, knowing that the bottom of her buttocks was barely covered. Leslie knew that she was attractive to most men, and worked out regularly to keep herself in shape. She had received plenty of attention from men and even a few women over the years.

Charlene's comment from last night came back to her and she smiled to herself at the thought of having her over for a sleepover with three of them dressed in matching panties. She knew Chris would love that. She chuckled to herself wondering what panties they'd wear.

"What's so funny?" Scott asked. He had noticed the movement while working on her hamstrings.

"Oh, nothing much" she answered. "Chris and I had a good friend over for dinner last night and she said something funny I was remembering. But's it's a bit personal so I sorry I can't repeat it."

"By the way, I told Chris he needs to make an appointment with you soon so you can work on his back."

"Got it. Do you want me to have Sandi call him to set it up?", said Scott.

"Yeah, that would be great. He isn't very good at his follow-through on stuff like this. I know he likes the massage and it helps him. But, he also seems a bit hesitant about it for some reason."

"Yeah, a lot of guys are like that," said Scott. "Some are bothered by the touching, and some don't like being mostly naked in front of anyone other than their partner. I try to make them as comfortable as possible, but I get it. I'll have Sandi call him."

Leslie's thoughts returned to the matching panty party. Chris would certainly go for the idea! While a threesome with a woman wasn't something she had given much thought to before, she was now curious about the experience.

Charlene was beautiful and sexy in her own right and Leslie suspected it would be very nice to receive oral from her. As they say, 'Nobody knows a woman like another woman.'

She knew Chris loved everything about going down on her. If he could enjoy exploring a cock, perhaps she might also enjoy exploring the many mysteries of a woman's sex. She shocked herself at this unexpected thought. And, surprised herself more when she started getting turned on. And wet.

She hoped Scott didn't notice.

He continued his work on her. "Wow, you are pretty tight in a lot of places, Leslie. What have you been doing?", he asked.

Leslie's eyes shot open and she quickly replied "Just some different routines but it hit me in new places." She smiled as she thought about thrusting her strap-on cock into Chris. It wasn't that much of an effort, but it was different enough to cause her some tightness in her back and hamstrings.

Leslie looked over her shoulder as Scott continued to work on her hamstrings. She could see Scott working hard to get the knots out. He was dressed in uniform of white shorts and a tee shirt. He was quite handsome, in shape, friendly, and good at his work. Leslie liked him as a masseuse and as a person. She continued to look him over. His back was now to her as he worked on her lower legs. She looked at his ass to admire it.

"So, how's Anne doing?", she asked, making small talk to distract herself from objectifying him.

"Unfortunately, Anne and I just broke up."

"Oh no! I'm so sorry!", said Leslie. "Can I ask what happened?"

Scott was silent for a bit as he continued his work.

"I'm sorry - I shouldn't pry", she added.

"It's okay", said Scott. "You're a friend. I was just gathering my thoughts on how to say it."

"There were some things about our relationship that were a challenge for her I guess. I didn't want it to end, but here we are. I love her. And, the hard thing is I think she still loves me. But, onward."

"Scott, I don't know what to say other than I'm so sorry. I thought she was the one."

"Yeah. Me too."

Scott continued to work on her hamstrings and lower back and said, "Brace yourself, I'm going to get into these knots back here." He started applying much more pressure, concentrating on a few spots. It hurt, but Leslie knew it would help relax the muscles and relieve the tightness.

Scott finished up the remainder of Leslie's massage and she was feeling much better now.

"Thanks, Scott!".

He just smiled and nodded at Leslie but seemed lost in thought for a few moments.

"I'm bi."

"What?", thinking she hadn't heard correctly.

"I'm bi. That's what Anne couldn't come to terms with. I never did anything outside of our relationship and never would have. But when I told her, she really struggled. I wanted to be honest with her. I thought she ought to know."

"I'm telling you because you're a friend and since my breakup didn't seem to make sense. I'm not ashamed of it. But yeah. That's why we..., why she broke up with me."

"Scott, she's making a huge mistake. I've come to realize a lot of things over the years of marriage, heck - even in the last few days. A great relationship isn't built around sex or sexuality. Those things are just an interesting and complex part of who we are, of how we express ourselves. There is no 'black and white' to our biology and our drives. People are all over the map about it. I doubt anybody is completely one way or the other.

"Maybe she'll come around."

"Maybe."

Returning home feeling physically much better, but troubled about Scott and Anne, Leslie went about her day, deciding to get after some of the weeds in the garden. Gardening was cathartic and gave her time to think without distraction.

She thought about relationships. Even solid ones are complex and can have some fragility. On the surface, it seemed as if they were perfect for each other.

If you communicate well, accept, love, and support each other, isn't that the goal? she wondered. And, why was his past problematic if he wasn't doing anything outside of their relationship?

Reflecting on her relationship with Chris and the revelations over the past few days, she wondered if she would have stayed in it if she had known early on of some of his predilections. She loved Chris deeply and had come to understand him better over time.

She knew a lot more about the give and take of relationships now, but earlier on it would have been more difficult to understand. How would she have handled it before they married? Would she have made the effort?

That was scary to think about. She realized she might have turned away from the man she loved and missed what had become a wonderful marriage because of some mismatch of sexual appetites. Yet, the sex was still satisfying in so many ways.

She could easily imagine why it was threatening to Anne that Scott had bisexual desires because she might have felt the same way earlier in her relationship with Chris.

And, then she thought about Chris. His indiscretion in the dark room was completely wrong, no excuses. But, it wasn't an affair. It didn't involve intimacy. It was an experience. Chris wanted a sexual experience she couldn't give him. And she had fantasies too.

Finished with weeding the garden, Leslie went in to take a shower to wash off the grit.

As she soaped herself down, she found her thoughts returning to Charlene's comments, and what it might be like to be with her.

While she was usually quick in the shower, she found herself languishing as the warm water washed over her, soothing and stimulating her skin at the same time. The soap helped her hands glide easily across her smooth skin.

She cradled and sensually squeezed her breasts and surprised herself imagining doing the same to Charlene. Her nipples became sensitive and she tweaked them gently. She understood why Chris paid so much attention to them when intimate. They felt good under her hands.

Her fingers continued to wander and found their way to her sex which tingled under her touch. Gliding along her labial petals, her fingers explored and caressed her folds and clitoris.

She dipped her fingers deep into her sex, something she had rarely done and was surprised at how wet she already was. She moved them in and out in the warm slickness, pushing deeper with growing arousal.

Her thoughts returned to Charlene's comment about wanting to get into her panties and responded by bringing her glazed fingers up to take in her fragrance.

She had never done this before as she didn't normally like Chris to even kiss her after he went down on her. Something was different. She again inhaled her bouquet and then brought her fingers to her lips, gently glossing them slick with her arousal.