Secrets Ch 19

19

I was relieved at first, knowing that I wouldn't have to try to come up with lies even about something so simple as to why I'd taken a late shower, but soon after that, the doubts and questions arose. After Master's teasing, if it had even been just teasing, I couldn't help but wonder whether or not Jane was telling me the truth about where she was, or who she was with.

Why wouldn't she cheat, I had to ask myself. Even after my shower, I could still taste cum in my mouth, and I knew all too well that there was more still sealed inside me by the plug. I hadn't dared remove it in the shower, as I had this feeling that Master would want it to remain inside me. What kind of man was I becoming? I wasn't sure, but it didn't seem like the kind that would inspire my wife to want me in her bed. The way she had spoken of my offer, it was like I had chosen oral sex instead of any other kind of sex, and she had granted it as an exclusive offer. I was left wondering if she had so quickly denied me only because she was confident she could get what she wanted from another man.

I wasn't exactly hungry, but I did fix myself a small dinner. I ate at the kitchen island, on a stool, feeling the plug inside me. I logged into the app, intending to spend the time fruitfully and at least update Master on my afternoon obedience. I was about to give him a breakdown of the events from my blindfolded point of view, but that proved unnecessary. Attached to his message of greeting were a number of photos, and they were all of me on that stage, sucking cock, being fucked and then jerking myself off as cum rained down upon me.

"Oh god, Master," was all that I could think of to say.

"Do you like how you look, my sexy little bitch? Does it please you to see yourself as these men do?" he asked.

"It is embarrassing, Master. It makes it so real that I did it, and that all those men saw."

"They didn't just see, did they? No, they felt you suck their cocks. They felt you take them inside as you offered up your sissy pussy. You did it all, on display, just so that you could have one little orgasm of your own."

I heard his voice, and I realized that I hadn't even been fully aware that our text exchange had changed to a voice call. Had he called me, or had I called him? The depth of his control over my mind and actions was starting to scare me just a little.

"Yes, Master. It felt good to obey, good to earn that reward."

"I hope it felt good, my little fucktoy, since it will probably be some time before you're given a gift like that again."

"It will, Master?"

"Yes, slut. It is important that you understand that it is the pleasure of those you serve that is more important. Your wife's pleasure is more important, be that because of your tongue, or however else she decides to achieve it. Your Master's pleasure is more important, achieved by your complete obedience and devotion. Even the pleasure of those random men you let fuck you is more important than your own little spurts of release."

"Yes, Master," I repeated back, though I knew it would take a bit of work yet to truly take this new truth in.

"I want to hear you say it again. Tell me that your wife's pleasure is more important, that my pleasure is more important, and that the pleasure of all those you serve is more important."

I drew in a deep breath.

"My wife's pleasure is more important than mine, Master. My Master's pleasure is more important than mine, Master. The pleasure of those whom I serve is more important than mine, Master."

"Good little bitch. Remember that. Obedience is your primary pleasure, from now on."

"Yes, Master," I replied. "Obedience is my primary pleasure."

"Good slut. That is why you can get pleasure from being plugged. You can get pleasure from being caged and denied. You can get pleasure from cleaning, cooking and serving. You can get pleasure from being allowed to amuse and entertain random men online. You are really very fortunate to be able to get pleasure in so many ways."

"Yes, Master. Thank you, Master, for making me so fortunate."

"You are welcome, fuckdoll," he said, then I heard him start to laugh. "I get such a kick out of breaking you and using you and having you thank me for it, slut. Right now your pathetic little sissy clit is locked away for as long as I choose, and your sissy pussy is full of strangers' cum, and who knows where your wife is, and here you are, thanking me for making it all happen."

"Yes, Master," I blushed in response.

I was thanking him and not just out of routine or habit. I couldn't deny to myself how this all was making me feel, now matter how surprising a sensation it was. I would've never pictured this for myself, but it had happened and I couldn't quite explain my own reactions. Dressing up made me squirm with the pleasure of knowing it pleased him. I knew in my heart that I had wanted to suck those men's cocks. I wanted to feel the arousal and pleasure my lips could bring them. I had wanted them to fuck me too. I wanted to feel that sensation that my body was theirs for pleasure and use. I remembered how my cock, still trapped, had throbbed and ached while they filled me up. Maybe it was really true, and obedience was the core of my pleasure.

"Tell me, slut -- how does it feel knowing that there are photos of your use today? Knowing that these men recorded your use and are likely watching it over and over, jerking off to your submission, or perhaps even sharing these images and videos with friends, or posting them online?"

"It is embarrassing and humiliating, Master, but I guess also a bit exciting. I can feel the power they have over me with it."

"You're going to have a following soon, no doubt. That public slut, used in clubs, playing with toys online while men watch."

"Oh god, yes Master," I moaned softly. I could feel the arousal from his words making me grow in the cage.

"Who knows, perhaps there will be someone who actually recognizes you. It is a big world out there, but someones a very small one too."

"Oh god, I hope not, Master."

"Would it really be so bad, slut?"

"I... I wouldn't want anyone who knew me, or knew my wife, to tell anyone, Master."

"Oh slut, the men who watch these things aren't likely to advertise their kinks. It's much more likely they would just tell you that they knew... but of course, that would put you in an awkward position, wouldn't it?"

"Yes, Master. It could."

"You'd have to do just about anything they said, wouldn't you?"

"I suppose so, Master."

"There would be another solution, of course."

"There would be, Master?"

"Oh yes. The power of this man would only come from the secret. What if your wife knew what you truly are? What if your needs and desires and interests were revealed to her?"

"I haven't had much luck with that in the past, Master," I admitted.

"I suspect, my little slut, that the reason for that is that you focused on yourself and what you thought your kinks were. If you start off by thinking about what turns you on, then of course she will have resistance. I think you've made a better start already, slut, by letting her know that she could use your mouth for pleasure whenever she wants. Perhaps the next step might be letting her know that it would please you to have her find her pleasure and satisfaction wherever she wants it, even if that was with another man. If you could share with her that even being cuckolded by her lover would actually make you happy, then perhaps she would be more open. You need to show her that it is her desire that is the focus of your evolving relationship."

"Yes, Master. I guess that would be better."

"It will be, slut. No more focussing on what you want or what turns you on. Your focus will be on how your service and obedience can please her and be of use to her. Remember, obedience is your pleasure."

"Yes, Master."

"You should know that I'm not talking about some theoretical idea of a discussion. You will talk with your wife about this. You will find a way to make it clear to her. Perhaps you can start with her recent denial of sex to you, or maybe you can suggest that you know that you've not been an adequate lover. However you decide to raise the issue, you will have this talk. It will be the start of revealing your true self to her, which will only lead to more pleasure for you in the end."

"I understand, Master," I managed to say, but my heart was pounding.

It had been so hard to talk openly with her about going down on her, but I had done it. It had surprised me a bit when she accepted, and even more when she put her own conditions on her acceptance. She had, without really knowing it, done the equivalent of placing me in chastity, just like Master had done with the cage. It almost seemed too much to think about, to have her know about that kind of control, and perhaps even be pleased and amused by it.

Master was right though. I had to stop myself from jumping to thoughts about what would turn me on or appeal to my kinks, and think about what pleasure these kinds of things could give her. I wondered if I could really talk to her about how it would be okay with me if she wanted another man, even if it was just for the kind of sex she didn't think she could have with me. The thought made my chest tight.

"While you wait for your wife to return home, slut, why don't you use your time productively. Since I'm sure you took good notes during your meeting, why don't you pick two of the men from your list and write up a bit about them, but I'd like to add something to your instructions. For one of them, you're going to describe for me how you'd want to pleasure them and service them. With the other, you're going to be choosing a man for your wife. Pick someone you think she'd like, and imagine how he would satisfy her in ways that you haven't."

"Yes, Master," I answered.

"Good slut. I know you'll make me proud," he said. "Now, get to work, since I'm sure you have no idea when your wife will return to you. You are to stay caged at least until she gets home but, if at all possible, I want you to stay plugged all night long. I want you to cherish that cum inside you for as long as you can."

"Yes, Master, I will," I answered, and then he was gone.

There really wasn't much risk of the plug being discovered, I knew, given that I knew for sure that there was no sex on the table for me. Even if she came home early enough to have some energy, the new rules were clear. She might want me to pleasure her, but that would be it. I probably wouldn't need to be undressed at all.

I cleaned up from my dinner and made sure that the kitchen was spotless. I did a quick check in the basement, making sure that all the unused toys were put away and hidden, and then returned upstairs. There was still no word at all from Jane, so I pulled out my laptop and got started on my assignment.

It seemed somehow easier to start with the man that I was to fantasize about serving myself. That was what had been on my mind during the assignment, and from the moment I'd started taking notes, Craig's name and face had stood out. One of the reasons was that I knew he was gay. He was very handsome and fit, to be sure, but his sexual orientation struck me as the most basic kind of fact to make the idea of servicing him more realistic or possible. I had no idea if I was his type at all -- in fact I kind of doubted that I was, as I was older and not exactly in gym shape.

That single thought placed me, for this little fantasy to send to Master, in the changing room of a gym, alone, with Craig. He was pushing me down to my knees as he stood in one of the open showers. He was naked, as was I, except that I seemed to have been locked in a chastity cage, even here in this dream. His cock was large, uncut and he was shaved smooth. He gave me instructions as I started, he gave me pointers as I continued, as he used his hands on my head to guide me, as I used my lips, mouth and tongue to pleasure him.

By the time he came, filling my mouth up with warm, salty cum, I found that I was aching in my cage. I couldn't quite tell when it had happened, but giving oral sex to men had somehow become a trigger for me. It made me feel aroused, obedient, submissive and excited. I stood up and walked around a bit, as there was little I could do other than wait out the discomfort. I was surprised that the ache was back so quickly, given that I'd actually been allowed to cum not much more than an hour previously.

Once the throbbing died down, I sat back at my computer, sent off the first half of my homework, then searched through the names for a subject to hypothetically pair with my wife. It was a strange way to think about these colleagues of mine. I decided to choose someone as different from me as I could think of. I thought of someone younger and more fit, but I also tried to make a guess at who would be more dominant or alpha than I was. After being married to a closeted submissive, I imagined that she might desire someone a little more "take charge." When I thought of it that way, only one man really fit the bill, and that was Alex.

Alex was tall, handsome and friendly, but in a way that had always given me a feeling like his personality was a bit too crafted. Sometimes talking with him felt like you were attending a self-actualization seminar, though it seemed to resonate with most of the others in the office, especially the women. He spoke with such confidence and always walked with his head high and his shoulders back.

I started the second half of my report with a brief physical description, then a note or two about why I had chosen him. After that I went right into describing the imagined scene of Jane's sexual satisfaction by him. He would be firm and assertive, giving her instructions and direction -- not quite in the way that Master spoke to me, but by just making it clear what he wanted and assuming that would please her as well. His hand would be on her from the start, caressing her and then unbuttoning her blouse. He would stand back as he undressed her, letting her beauty please his eyes as well as his touch.

Once she was stripped down to her lingerie, he would pull her to himself, kiss her hard and then turn her body. His arms would reach around and cup her breasts as he rubbed himself against her ass. He could see Jane giving in, leaning forwards, perhaps until her hands were spread out on the surface of their bed, and then Alex would take her. He would push her thong aside and drive into her wet and ready pussy. She would shudder and moan as he filled her up more fully and thoroughly than I could. He would make her cum hard and with multiple crests, so that her legs would weaken and he would push her onto all fours on the bed as he continued to use her until he came inside her. The thought that he would use a condom seemed impossible.

I had to stand again, as once more I had brought myself to the kind of arousal that the cage punished me for. I had to wonder what was wrong with me, and if other men got hard with the thought of other men taking their wives and doing a better job of pleasuring them than they could. Was this really what I wanted? Was I really going to surrender my wife's body to other men, while I served as her domestic help and as the sexual plaything for my Master and all those whom he chose to give me to? That thought was tormenting me and keeping my sissy clit throbbing. My body's reactions seemed impossible to argue with. Perhaps obedience was my truest pleasure.

I sent my homework report to Master and then packed up my computer. It was getting late and there was still no sign or update from Jane. As the time passed without any text or call, I thought more and more about who she might be with. I was also wondering what I would do about my cage. I had not been permitted to remove it until she came home, which meant that if she stayed out very late I would either have to wait up for her or try to go to bed with it on, with all the discomfort and risk of discovery that went along with it. Not only did I think that the cage would keep me awake, it just seemed too dangerous. I poured myself a drink of whisky and sat in front of the TV, distractingly watching sports highlights as I waited.

Interlude

Jane was so nervous as her work day finally came to an end. She couldn't quite believe that she'd decided to go home with Theo, but she had. She heard Jennifer's voice in her head, urging her on. Even so, she certainly didn't want it broadcast around the office that anything was going on between them, so she kept her cool and didn't make any more contact with him for the rest of the day. They had set a time and a place, so she would just meet him outside the office and go from there.

She found herself happy that she'd decided on one of her favourite outfits, with her absolute sexiest lingerie beneath it. She'd wanted to feel good about herself and to show off, but she'd never quite imagined that her decision would pay off in the way that it had.

She left her office right at 5:30, purposefully not looking around for him as she made her way to the elevator. There were a few pleasantries to me made to others leaving at the same time, with wishes for a good weekend to be returned, but she kept her responses short. Down in the lobby, she lingered, saying goodbye to those she'd ridden in the elevator with, but trying not to be too obvious that she was waiting for anyone. Her phone chimed with a text, which turned out to be from Theo.

"What do you say you start walking south and I'll catch up once we've cleared the office area?"

"Great idea," she replied.

She took a breath and walked out onto the street, turning south once she reached the corner and then striding along, feeling such excitement building inside her. After a couple of blocks, Theo came alongside her, smiling widely.

"I have to admit, you look so good in that skirt I was tempted to walk behind you for a bit longer," he joked.

Jane slapped at his arm and laughed, but not before noticing the firmness of his muscles underneath it. From then on, Theo took the lead and they chatted as they walked. It took only about 20 minutes before they reached his building. He opened the outer door for her, tapped a keyfob at the inner lock, and then guided her into the well-appointed lobby. They didn't speak while he called the elevator and as they rode up. Jane was worried that he'd be able to hear her heart pounding.

She followed him down the corridor and then into his apartment.

"Here we are," he announced as the door closed behind her.

"This place is quite nice," she replied, looking around and being pleased not only with the decor but also its cleanliness.

It had been a long time since she'd been in a single man's home, and she had been wondering if it would be too obviously decorated or outfitted as a bachelor pad or man cave. In actuality it seemed tasteful and classy.

"I hope that isn't too much of a surprise," he replied with a smile. "Would you like a drink?"

"Yes, please," he answered quickly, then laughed at her own enthusiasm.

"I've got some white wine in the fridge, if that works for you," he said.

"It really would," she answered.

He took out the bottle, uncorked it, and poured two glasses.

"Cheers," he said, handing her a glass and lifting his own in the air. "To new adventures."

"To new adventures," she said with a smile, feeling her cheeks warm, and she touched her glass to his, hearing the pleasing chime of good crystal.

"So," he said, "I promised you dinner. What are you interested in?"

Jane tilted her glass back and downed nearly half of her wine.

"I want you to fuck me," she answered, looking him right in the eyes.

Theo met her gaze and didn't let eye contact break, even as she set his wine glass down on the counter.