The dirty duo made their way carefully to the nearest clothing store. They didn't pay much attention to which one they were wandering into, preoccupied as they were with trying to walk without sloshing their various foodstuffs around more than was strictly necessary.
'Whose bloody idea was this?' Lucy asked, grinning as she walked bow-legged across the threshold of a relatively upmarket-looking shop.
'This part was your idea,' Sameena replied.
'Very funny.'
'Oh, I think we're both equally to blame for the current state of, uh, everything.'
The store wasn't especially busy, but Sam and Lucy earned several funny looks from the customers who were there. They couldn't really blame anyone for looking at them strangely, given their current appearance. Lucy with her trail of milkshake and shoes squelching with greasy noodles; Sam with her own noodles spilling out of her half-exposed bra; both with half-dried dhal clinging to their faces. Still, it was somewhat reassuring to notice that at least one bored-looking boyfriend was enjoying the view. Lucy rewarded the ogler with a cheeky wink.
The member of staff who intercepted the pair on their way to the changing room looked far less enamoured, however. 'You can't come in here like that,' she told them firmly. 'There's a public toilet down by the music shop.'
'I don't understand,' Sameena replied. 'What's the problem?'
To her credit, the bottle blonde woman was unfazed by Sam's silliness, pausing for a moment to let the ridiculousness of that question infuse the situation. Eventually, she responded with, 'You're making a mess and you're causing a scene. You've left a trail behind you.'
Sam and Lucy turned to look behind them. In their effort to get into the store as stiffly as possible, they had failed to notice the sticky, slippery track they had created. 'Ah. Sorry about that,' Sam said with genuine sympathy. As a cleaner herself, it was galling to think she was making someone else's job harder.
'I've got an idea,' Lucy said in a tone that made Sam nervous and excited in equal measure.
'Oh, no. We need to get cleaned up before any more dares,' Sam replied.
'Are you listening to me?' the third woman said. 'You can't be here in that state.'
'Yes, yes, give us a minute,' Lucy said. Then she put her hand between her mouth and the staff member and muttered quietly, 'Sam, I dare you to mop the mess up with your chest.'
'Will that even work?' Sam asked, cupping the outline of her slop-filled bra and instantly regretting moving the slimy noodles around.
'One way to find out,' Lucy said. Smiling at the other woman, she said, 'I'm sorry about the mess, truly. If you just let us get sorted out here, we'll buy a whole new outfit each and we'll clear up the mess we've made.'
'We will?' Sam asked, incredulous.
'We will,' Lucy said. 'We'll clean ourselves up, buy the outfits, then clean up. Understand?'
The obvious implication dawned on Sam. The shop worker would hopefully be happy with making a sale and having someone clean up the mess. What she didn't know was that the order of operations dictated by Lucy would mean that Sam would be mopping up the spillage with the chest of her new outfit, ruining it immediately.
The employee mused the offer for a moment. 'Alright. A full outfit?'
'Top to bottom,' Lucy replied. 'Shoes, underwear, the lot. I'm not sure these shoes are going to survive the day, anyway.'
'Fine. I'll have the cleaning stuff placed by the tills for you. I'll tell security to make sure you don't go anywhere.'
'Unnecessary but understandable.'
The woman turned to leave, then paused and turned back again. 'Oh. One other thing. I really can't let you traipse that mess through the store, least of all into the fitting rooms.'
'W-wait,' Sam stammered. 'What are you saying?'
'I think you know what I'm saying.'
Sam and Lucy looked at one another in disbelief, then their expressions cracked simultaneously into laughter. Had they found a kindred spirit or was this woman just trying to make them pay for messing up her store? Either way, they both felt adrenaline thrumming through their bodies again at the idea of what was coming next.
'Not the whole way, surely?' Sam asked.
'Look, I don't know what you've been playing at, but if you can assure me most of the mess is in those clothes we'll leave it at that.'
They both knew it would be a lie, but stripping completely in public felt a bit too far, even for them. They muttered their gratitude in unison and watched the woman head over to a burly security guard and point over at them. The change in his expression and body language was priceless, but now they knew they would have an audience for the impromptu and deeply unprofessional striptease. They could have predicted that anyway, of course, but knowing that one guy would definitely be looking felt different to assuming that shoppers might glance over at them.