by c.w. cobblestone and cuckytoher
The bus bounced wildly along the road, lurching at every turn, causing the passengers to lean hard every time we came to a sharp bend. The sun was almost gone, and the dusky scenery outside the window was a shadowy green blur as we raced past the countryside.
The bus driver must've been in an awful hurry - he was driving way past the speed limit - but I didn't mind. I wanted to get to Colorado as quickly as possible.
None of the other passengers were complaining, either. It had been a long trip from New York. Three days. Three grueling days on a TravelRight bus - and it was my distinct misfortune to be sitting in front of a couple tow-headed little brats who screamed, cried and kicked my seat throughout the entire trip.
The voyage was made even more unpleasant for me by the huge butt-plug that was imbedded deep in my ass. That was Janice's idea. Every time the bus hit a bump, I thought of my wife.
Whenever the bus would sway, it felt like my intestines were being ripped open. But the pain in my rectum didn't matter: I was on my way to see my Janice!
Janice and her lover, Roy, were on vacation in Colorado. They'd left me at home to take care of the chores. And, boy, did they leave me a long list of chores to do! I had to clean the garage, the basement and the gutters; I also had to go to Roy's house and paint his bathroom and living room. On top of all that, I was expected to carry out my normal household duties.
The idea was, they would have a marvelous two weeks skiing in Aspen, and when they got home, every little dirty job they wanted done would be taken care of by yours truly.
But when they got to their hotel, they discovered that they'd forgotten to pack their camera.
So guess who had to bring it to them?
That's right: My wife had the audacity to call me on the phone and order me to hop on a bus and travel nearly 2,000 miles to bring them their lousy camera! Hell, they could've easily just bought another camera - after all, Roy's got money to burn. And the damn bus ticket cost almost as much as the camera!
But they really didn't care about the camera; these are the kind of power-trip games they like to play with me. They keep pushing, it seems, to see how far I'll let them go. So far, they haven't reached my breaking point.
When it comes to Janice, I doubt if I even have a breaking point.
Of course, I didn't object out loud to having to take the camera to them. I'm way too pussywhipped to ever argue with my wife, no matter how unreasonable she's being. About all I could do was keep my mouth shut, and pray that maybe Janice and Roy would allow me to stay with them for the rest of their vacation. But I certainly wasn't holding my breath.
The bus finally pulled into the Aspen station around midnight. As soon as I got off the bus, I found a pay phone and called my wife's hotel room. I had to call collect - I didn't have a dime to my name.
After about 10 rings, the operator clicked back on the line and told me the call didn't go through. I kept trying every couple minutes, but each time it was the same result: No answer.
I wandered through the bus terminal for awhile, but walking was uncomfortable because of the butt plug in my ass. I gingerly took a seat at the rear of the station, feeling totally dejected and alone. I hadn't had a bite to eat since I left home, and I was starving. But my wife had told me not to bring any money with me on the bus: "You don't need money," she told me. "I don't want you stuffing your face with Twinkies at every stop - you're disgusting enough already."
"Disgusting." I hear that term of endearment all the time.
I wasn't always this fat. In fact, when I first married Janice, I was actually in pretty good shape. But as the years began piling up, so did the pounds. Eventually, my wife stopped being attracted to me.
Then she started dating Roy. The rest, as they say, is history.
* * *
My life really started going downhill a few years ago, when I lost my first job as a computer programmer. My company downsized, and left me holding a mortgage and a shitload of other bills. I desperately tried to find a job in my field, but the market had dried up like the Sahara Desert.
Try as I may, I just couldn't find a job. I could tell my wife was starting to lose respect for me. I gained nearly 60 pounds during my time on unemployment, and Janice was constantly berating me about my weight.
"Look at you," she'd say. "You're a fat loser. Nobody wants to hire a fat-ass loser, Harold."
It killed me whenever Janice would talk to me like that, but I would never say a word. I didn't want to start an argument. My wife had always been the dominant one in our marriage, but after I lost my job, she really began taking control of things. It's tough for a man to stand up for himself when he isn't bringing home the bacon.
Finally, after months of fruitless job-hunting, Janice informed me that there was an opening at the bank where she worked. I was happy for a second - until she told me it was a janitor's position.
When I protested that I was too qualified to work as a janitor, my wife was ready with a quick answer:
"It doesn't sound to me like too many people are impressed with your so-called qualifications, Harold," she spat. "If you're so damned qualified, why don't you have a job by now?"
Of course, I applied for the job the next day.
I interviewed with a Mr. Roy Halls, the vice-president of the bank. After a long conversation, Mr. Halls told me I had the job.
"Your wife is one of our best tellers, so you have a good foot in the door right off the bat," he said. "And - if you don't mind my saying so - Janice is...easy on the eyes, if you know what I mean!" He cupped his hands in front of his breasts and smirked. "Harold, your wife is absolutely STACKED! Va-voom!"
"Yes, sir."
It made me seethe inside to hear Mr. Halls talking about my wife like that, but I wisely kept my indignation to myself.
I started my new job a week later. At work, Janice treated me pretty much the same as she treated me at home: As an inferior. From the very first day, she was ordering me around in that disgusted tone of voice she uses when she addresses me. And she would frequently put me down in front of the other tellers.
One day while I was emptying the trash, I heard my wife talking to Karen, the woman at the window next to her.
"Look at him, bent over like that," Janice said. "His ass looks like a beach ball!"