Some people might think being the coat check guy at the local theatre would be boring but it really can be quite fun. People watching has always been one of my favourite pastimes and there are few places better to do it than behind the counter at the coat check in a crowded theatre. Getting to watch free plays in not a bad perk either.
When I first started working here I would start to get bored just after the first intermission. Before the first intermission there were usually a few latecomers rushing in only to have to hang out at the concession stand, trying to explain to themselves or the concession girl why being late was not their fault. She and I would often exchange withering glances whenever the couples in question were distracted by the boxes of candy and mini-sized drinks.
After several weeks I began to leave my coat-hanger cubicle during the second act and talk to her about the latest couple and how they were just like all the others: being late for the play was always the other person's fault, the taxi driver's fault, or the most popular excuse, that babysitter who needs to buy herself a watch.
I remember one night while we were sitting in the upstairs lounge after closing, sharing a box chocolate covered mints, she looked at me as I was taking a drink from a mini sparkling water and said, "I like giving head." She said it was like she had commented on the weather but I had turned completely beet red. She popped a couple of candies in her mouth as she stared at me. "I really like giving head."
She had been so casual about it and so sensual at the same time that when she asked me what I liked it just slipped out. "I like fur and fuzzy clothes." She handed me the box of candies, lifted the drink from my hand and took a few sips.
"We're going to have fun," she said. "Lots of fun.
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It was about two weeks later that she came over to my corner of the lobby after the masses had filtered back into the theatre to their seats for the second act.
"It looks like you have quite a mad rush on lozenges tonight," I said as she crossed her arms on my counter. "I guess cold and flu season hits even the well-to-do crowd."
"It's like I've always said - everybody enjoys a good suck once in a while." She raised her right arm from the countertop and rested her chin on her hand and smiled at me. "Don't you agree?"
I became very flushed and didn't know where to look. "I would imagine they do."
"Hey," she said, "did you see that woman in wearing the sable bandana?"
How could I have missed her. When she came in tonight she was wearing the most exquisite sable coat with thick, thick cuffs. "Um, yeah, I guess," I said as casually as possible.
"Come on," she said, "we've worked together long enough - you don't need to be shy around me. Tell me you were watching her from the moment she walked in this evening."
I admitted I had. "She comes to see plays quite a lot. She's a good tipper, too."
"And she has the most fabulous wardrobe," she pointed out. "Every night she's come in since the fall she has worn either the most decadent sweater or the cutest fur." With that she stood up, opened the door to the coat check and walked in.
As she started rifling through the coats and hats on the racks I asked her half-jokingly, "Did you forget you coat, miss?"
"Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. Maybe I'm looking to update my wardrobe." She began to flip through the coats. "Where's my sable?," she said without looking over at me.
"What do you mean your sable?"