Harriet Learns To Smoke And Fuck Ch13

Interlude

Report:

Harriet Danes

Upper Sixth Form

Kunt College

April 2050

Dear Mr & Mrs Danes,

Harriet has been making excellent progress in her academic studies this term. She is to be congratulated on the fact that the Royal Academy of Fucking have not felt the need to call her for a live audition, but have already offered her an unconditional place based upon her 'A'-Level Fucking Guided Cuntwork. I know that Professor Cuntslicker, Principal of the RAF, is very keen on expanding the range of fetishes represented in her Academy; Harriet's will doubtless be a great asset to the RAF, and in due course the world at large.

Harriet, Michael and Janey are working very hard with me to prepare their item for the 'Smoke-'n'-Fuck' competition in June. The competition will doubtless be stiff -- but such is Harriet's devotion to honing her technique that I think she stands a good chance of making an excellent impression.

On a personal note, please accept my thanks for your invitation to Harriet's lecturers to attend her wedding in July. Mme Grossebite, Mr Gropecunt, Nurse Coxucca, Mr Ahss-Faqr and myself will all be delighted to attend. And I am sure they will all join me in commending Harriet on choosing not to let her marriage interrupt her fucking vocation: it is so important these days for young ladies to be fearless in demonstrating to the world the inherent complementarity of the roles of wife and fuckwhore; I am sure you will agree.

Kind regards,

Miss P. Poussée

Deputy Head of Fucking | Tutor, Fuckindor House

Kunt College, London

"Proud to be Enlightened: Valuing and Nurturing the Fuckers of the Future"

PART THREE:

Summer

Chapter Thirteen:

Traitors in Our Midst

"Well, well, welcome everybody to Wankminster Central Hall. This former Methodist church is famous for have hosted meetings of the suffragette movement in the 1910s, the United Nations General Assembly in the 1940s, and the Fuckers' Party in the 2030s -- making it the perfect venue for today's event, which is also devoted to breaking new ground in the liberation of mankind and the pursuit of Enlightenment ideals. For today is the final session of 'Smoke 'n' Fuck' -- a brand new competition for young smoking fetish fuckers. I am Fuxmy Gopal," the young dark-skinned beauty added, as she walked, face to camera, backwards down the central aisle of the auditorium. "And I am fortunate that today's panel of distinguished judges have been able to take a few minutes out of their busy schedule to talk to us," she added, as the camera widened its shot to take in the whole of her lithe young body, wrapped in a tight red fishnet gown, through which her pert black nipples poked alluringly. "And here they are: Doctor Jon Taylor from Saint Fartholomew's Hospital" -- a tall wiry man with light brown hair and a very fat cock visible dangling, for ease of access presumably, between the open folds of his white lab coat; "Doctor Danica Clijtst, Lecturer in Fetish Studies at Titty University" -- smiling and topless, her black hair tied back out of the way of her large natural breasts, which swayed as she spoke; "and Doctor Zara Qunta from Imperial College London." Dr Qunta was pretty, dark-skinned, slightly plump, with lovely jiggling breasts half peeping out from under her suit jacket.

"Jon Taylor, if I may begin with you," continued Fuxmy, "I am sure our viewers today will be interested to know what has spurred your interest in the smoking fetish."

"Well, Fuxmy, I am of course a medical doctor, and have been excited to witness first-hand the thoroughly positive effects smoking has had on the young people who have taken up the habit during the course of this past year. It is no secret that the youth of the 2020s and '30s struggled with levels of anxiety and depression unknown in earlier generations -- exacerbated, as we now know, by the gradual banning of smoking in this country. The advent of the Enlightenment in the '30s helped immeasurably, of course, as there is nothing better for young bodies and minds than unfettered access to fucking. But I have been delighted to see how so many young people have also been helped by taking up smoking -- some even crediting it with curing their depression, mitigating their suicidal thoughts, even getting them off benefits and back into work! Nicotine, in short, is a superb anti-depressant. Combine it with fucking, and you can't do better!"

"That's fascinating, Jon," replied Fuxmy. "Why, then, Danica Clijtst, has there been such a disappointingly low level of smoking take-up in the young since its re-legalisation?"

"That's a good question, Fuxmy," replied Danica, "though it is wonderful to see so many beautiful teenage smokers here today!" She gestured around at the gathering numbers of performers, stage crew, journalists and audience members, many of whom were happily smoking, individually or in groups, showing off their fetish styles and techniques to each other, a few of them fucking, sucking cock, or licking pussy at the same time. "And I hope that today's competition will help young people all over the country to see the sheer beauty and hotness of smoking, and how it is the perfect fetish adjunct to a free-fucking lifestyle!"

"So should all of us take up smoking, then?" asked Fuxmy. "Zara Qunta, you are part of the team who have developed the medical technology which is essential to the re-introduction of smoking to the Enlightened world: what is your opinion?"

"Well, Fuxmy, you are probably the only one of us still young enough to be able to do so," laughed Zara. "So far, the only Lung-Safe® Medical Modification procedure we have been able to develop which is approved by NICE -- that's the National Institute for Cunt Excellence -- is only effective for the under 30s. For the rest of us, smoking continues to cause a handful of minor side-effects -- such as a lingering painful death," Zara grinned wickedly.

"Well, judges, thank you so much for your time. We'll come back to you later, if that's all right, but in the meantime --" Fuxmy slid smoothly sideways so the judges disappeared from her screen "let's go and meet some of the performers!"

*

The morning sun which streamed in behind Harriet and her party as they entered the porch fell, by delightful happenstance, on two young ladies seated, topless, behind a table marked:

PERFORMERS RECEPTION

They appeared to be enjoying a happy smoky kissing session, blowing thin streams of smoke between pursed lips into each other's mouths, inhaling each other's smoke and playing with it with deftly controlled French- and mini-snap-inhales before exhaling it back into each other's throats, all the while tangling and licking and sucking at each other's tongues. Their small pert nipples brushed gently against each other: with the morning sunshine on them, they looked like a pair of topless angels cumplaying on the clouds of Heaven, Harriet thought.

As the party from Kunt College entered, the two girls paused their smoke-kissing, turning to exhale a pair of long thick cone exhales towards the new arrivals. "M' cunt!" called one of them, in a charmingly plebeian Essex drawl, "can I help ya?"

Harriet took a deep drag of her own Marlboro red before introducing herself and her party through a long puffy exhale: "Harriet Danes, from Kunt College, with Michael Didcock and Jane Harris. And this is our coach, Miss Poussée, and her assistant Mister Ahss-Faqr."

"Hi Harriet, I'm Jaimey," announced the first girl with a broad smile. She was tall and slender, with long straight red hair, pale freckled skin, eyelids shadowed dusky red, and improbably long eyelash extensions fluttering in the sunshine. "And this is Becky," she added, gesturing to the other girl, who had short pink hair, pierced nipples and septum, and a large tattoo of a bikini-wearing pirate girl all the way down her right arm, with which she waved good-naturedly. "Becky, can ya take Harriet and her gang to their dressin' room while I mind the desk?"

*

"Oh fuck, isn't that beautiful!" Harriet exclaimed as Becky led them through the main lobby, where she was greeted by the sight of a ceiling-high mural featuring a closeup view of a glistening cunt and pierced clit, a long white lit cigarette dangling at a casual but cheeky angle from its swollen pink lips. Michael agreed, nodding vigorously; Janey chuckled with amusement at both of them.

"That's me!" Becky announced proudly in her broad Cheshire accent. "Like me pussy then?"

"Fuck yeah!" enthused Harriet. "And the angle of the cigarette: so totally fuck-me!"

"Glad you think so," replied Becky. "I was arguing with the photographer about it. 'E wanted it straight, and centred, but I said it would look too aggressive. This way's more seductive, I think..."

"Yeah, nonchalant smoking cunt -- I like the look. And -- oh fuck!" Harriet stopped in her tracks, for Becky had just led her through a pair of double doors into the main auditorium, which was, to Harriet's utter delight, full of people smoking! There were stagehands and ushers, sound engineers and lighting technicians, all going about their business: all young, all beautiful, and all smoking. Harriet beamed. "Oh fuck, I've never seen so much smoking before!" she grinned, as she took in the sights. "I'm the only one in my school who smokes. This is totally fucking!"

"Yeah, that's why I volunteered to 'elp out on this competition," explained Becky. "Jaimey and me are the only two in our school that smoke. Everyone just keeps telling us 'ow much we stink. Frankly, I don't give a shit -- but it's nice to be somewhere you're not the only one."

Harriet was barely listening, as her eyes took in the glorious smoking-and-fucking cornucopia around her. A blonde stage hand was on her knees on the stage, pert tits dangling beneath her, marking out set layouts with masking tape, a damp cork-tipped cigarette butt gripped firmly between her lips, one eye closed against the smoke. Her colleague, pudgy and dark-haired, was dangling a long white between her lips, exhaling through the nose while rolling out electrical cables. At the rear of the auditorium the stage manager was ensconced in his prompt corner, surrounded by cables, control panels, mixing desks, knobs and buttons. He was dangling a Marlboro red while testing out lights, microphones and loudspeakers, while issuing orders to his various assistants. "Annie," he called out to one, "Here, we need to test the cunt mikes. Clip this on yer pubic hair and rub yerself off for me, will ya?"

"Righto, Gary," replied the brunette, lifting up her skirt to reveal a very hairy cunt. "Like, just above me clit, or higher up?"

"As close to yer cunt as you can get it without it hurting. I need to pick up all the squelching. Oh and, Susie, we need to test the smoke spots. Will ya stand centre stage and smoke for me until I tell ya to stop?" Gary waited for Susie to take her position and start blowing huge billowing clouds of smoke into the air before flicking his own cigarette butt into a rear corner of the hall and calling out, "Warning, house going dark!" -- just as the amplified sound of Annie's squelching cunt began resonating through the blackness of the auditorium.

*

As Becky led Harriet and her party into the green room, they were greeted by a rhythmic sound resembling a cross between a duck quacking and a toilet being plunged. It turned out to be coming the throat of a young woman with short but dishevelled black hair and darkly shaded eyelids who was lying on her back on a green couch, her head dangling backwards over the sofa arm while a young man plunged his impressively large cock in and out of her gullet. Even as she exhaled a thick column of white smoke upwards, her eyes were open and bloodshot, snot was dribbling from her nose into her eyes, and splashes of spit were flying from her mouth and dripping down her forehead into her hair. "Victoria," Becky called out, "say 'ello to 'Arriet."

Victoria paused her skullfuck to look up. "Oh, you're the last of us four finalists! What sort of show are you putting on? I'm going for the brutal throatfuck angle, as you can see."

"No shit, you're brilliant!" enthused Harriet. "Wish I could deepthroat like you. And so does Mikey, I shouldn't imagine -- what d'you think, Mikey?"

Mikey was transfixed, watching Victoria continue to smoke as she joined them, her various bodily fluids changing direction of travel as she stood up: spit and slobber now dribbling down her chin and onto her large hanging tits, and snot oozing across her upper lip onto her cigarette filter. "Fuck yeah!" muttered Michael somewhat incoherently.

"Like it, Mikey?" grinned Victoria. "Maybe fuck my face after the show then?" She opened her mouth wide in invitation, exhaling a thick column of smoke before licking more snot off her lips.

"Oh yeah..." muttered Michael, mouth agape, cock tenting his trousers. Harriet and Janey giggled.

"Oh look, and here are Sasha and Masha," interrupted Becky, as a pair of tall dark-fringed vixens with tanned skin and large, perfectly rounded tits stuffed into their bikini tops sashayed nonchalantly into the room, "more fellow competitors!" Harriet could not work out which was which, but guessed that it didn't matter a lot, as the girls were, as far as she could tell, identical bar the colours of their tops: one pink, the other light green. Both were nude from the breasts down, their skin smooth and glowing, their respective pubic bushes shaved into narrow arrow-shaped landing strips directing the viewer southwards. Each one's clit was a tiny button, dark shaven pussy-lips guarding the way to a tight gleaming slit, and each had a pack of Virginia Slims menthol 120s tucked into the right cup of her bikini. They were both smoking with slow ecstatic open-mouthed inhales.

"Oh fuck, love your cigarettes!" squealed Harriet. "I've never tried those!"

"I think they're erotic," replied pink-bikini girl wispily, tossing her long black silky hair and taking a slow drag on her cigarette. "And we're going for the erotic look today." She exhaled a narrow stream of smoke towards the ceiling, before sticking her tongue out so that her green-clad partner could give it an affectionate suck.

"Fucking!" enthused Harriet. "Slender bodies, slim cigarettes, narrow exhales, thin landing-strips, tight slits: such a perfectly co-ordinated look!"

"Yeah, total fucking contrast with throatslut muggins, eh?" cackled Victoria. "So what kind of smoking show are you giving us today, Harriet? Snob lez erotica like Sasha and Masha, or filthy fuck porn like me? Hey, are all these people fucking you?" she asked, indicating the other members of her party.

"What? Oh, no, sorry, only Mikey and Janey are. Miss Poussée is my coach, and Mr Ahss-Faqr is here to help out."

"M' pussy," Victoria waved courteously. "Ooh, I feel quite outdone now... It's just me and Paul, see," Victoria gestured to her big-dicked partner who was standing expectantly by the sofa, his huge cock still dripping with Victoria's throat-slime, "and Sasha and Masha have come alone!"

"It's not quantity that counts, Vic," remonstrated green-bikini girl with a sultry drawl, as she tangled tongues with her partner and exhaled slowly into her mouth. "If it did, well, Clytemnestra has got more fuckers with her than I can keep track of, she --"

"Oh, where is Clytemnestra?" interrupted Becky. "She's the only one of the four finalists you 'aven't yet met," she explained helpfully to Miss Poussée.

"In her dressing room," sneered Victoria, "bleaching her asshole or whatever she's doing..."

"Oh, that reminds me," replied Becky, "I'd better show you to yours, 'adn't I? Follow me!"

But it was as they were moving towards the door to the dressing room corridor that said door burst open, and in strode a tall girl with mousey-brown hair, a sneer on her face, and two pert breasts on the front of her naked body, nipples upturned like her nose. She was smoking Silk Cock 100s Superkinks and exhaling through a noisy tirade which she was directing, with an upper class Fuckinghamshire accent and a superior attitude, at a small crowd of naked priapic young men trailing in her wake. "I don't give a fucking shit what you think, guys: shave your fucking cocks now, or they're not going in my fucking arse. I've designed this fucking show, and I'm paying you to do what I fucking tell you -- is that clear? I chose you for the size of your cocks, not your brains -- which is just as well for you!" Her voice was posh, her demeanour superior, and her sneer utterly withering -- but she stopped short in front of Harriet. "Ohhh," she intoned slowly, as she lifted her head and nose-exhaled directly downwards at Harriet, "this must be the cunt from Kunt: I've heard so much about you..."

Harriet, though somewhat taken aback, decided to try to be friendly. "M' cunt, I'm Harriet," she said, extending her hand.

"Clytemnestra Ffuckes-Dyckes," replied the girl, looking witheringly down her nose at Harriet. "You do anal, do you?" she asked accusingly.

"Uh... yes... why do you ask?" Harriet replied, as disarmingly as she could.

"Are you doing anal today?"

Harriet would have preferred not to discuss the details of her performance prior to going on stage, but she thought it couldn't hurt to offer a confidence building measure or two. "Yes, I am -- though I'm sure I'm not as good as you..."

Oh, that sounded really simpering

, Harriet thought to herself, even as the words left her lips -- and Clytemnestra thought so too. "I'm taking two cocks in my arse today -- at the same time!" she sniggered, as if issuing a challenge.

"Oh, fucking!" replied Harriet, genuinely impressed. "How long did it take you to learn that? Do you have a GM asshole?"

"

Ass

hole?" replied Clytemnestra with a contemptuous drawl. "How utterly mid-Atlaaantic! Where did you grow up, girl?"

Harriet flustered and fumbled, not sure what to say -- but Clytemnestra clearly wanted to humiliate, rather than interrogate her. "How pornographic you are, my dear! I thought they would teach you better at Kunt -- or is that a school for

nouveau-riche

idiots? I attend Lady Eleanor Whorish, I'll have you know, and here, take a look at my '

asshole

'!" She pronounced the last word in a contemptuously exaggerated North American manner whilst turning her back, bending over, and stretching her buttocks to reveal an impressively gaping rectum --

wide enough, surely, for at least three cocks at once

, Harriet couldn't help thinking, as Clytemnestra took a deep double drag on her cigarette, tightened her anal rim, and let out a long noisy fart right in Harriet's face. "That's my

arse

, Harriet," she continued, emphasising the traditional British pronunciation. "

Aaarse

rhymes with

claaass

-- or do you not have any?!" she cackled. "What say you, boys?"

"Fuck yes, Clytty!" chanted the boys behind her in obedient unison -- six of them, in fact, all tall, strongly built, muscular, with identically huge cocks standing erect from their crotches.

It was only then that Harriet looked at their faces, and realised that she recognised one of them. Miss Poussée did too. "Danny!" they both blurted out.

Danny had clearly been trying to disappear into the background -- which was difficult with a cock his size. As the other boys parted to allow the team from Kunt to see him better, it also became clear that he was not alone: his habitual slut Danielle was there too, sour-faced as usual, and naked from the waist down, a smear of her cunt-juice gleaming on Danny's thigh. Miss Poussée was as unamused as Harriet. "Danny, Danielle -- what on earth are you doing here? You made it perfectly clear that you do not like the smoking fetish, and you refused to support Harriet in her entry for this competition! And now you are competing against a representative of your own school?"