Chapter One
Las Vegas Escort
Hi. My name is Kaden Cross and I'm going to tell you a story. Now I must warn you, this story is going to be...*whispers* a bit erotic. It involves sex between myself and my wife, myself and my girlfriend, my wife and my girlfriend, and myself with the both of them. Yes, at the same time. Now, I know what you're thinking. 'Is this one of those kinky sex stories?' The answer is... Yes. Yes it is. So, if that's not your thing, I'd highly advise that you stop reading right now.
But, I digress. This story I'm going to tell has mystery and intrigue, murder and mayhem and... Okay, enough of that bullshit. It's got a bit about me and my wife and how we met, but mostly is centered around how we met our girlfriend. Oh, my wife's name, by the way, is Julie Rhoades. Well, It's Julie Cross, now, obviously, but for the sake of everyone being able to keep up with the characters, we'll stick with Rhoades. My girlfriend, you ask? Well, let's wait until she's introduced in the story to get her name, sound good? Awesome! I knew there was a reason I loved you guys!
Alright, down to the nitty gritty. Me! Now, as I said, my name is Kaden Cross and I'm an attorney. Ooookay, okay. Normally I would pause here for a few minutes to let you all rifle through your repertoire of witty lawyer jokes, but honestly, no matter what joke you pull out of your ass, I've most likely heard it a billion times. So, we're gonna skip that part. *sigh* Okay, Jules, I'll let them. Jules, that's my wife, is furiously tapping me on the head letting me know that, in the interest of making everybody happy, she says you guys can get your jokes ready. But I'll listen to them AFTER I've told the story, agreed? Good.
Okay, a little bit more about me. I'm a white thirty-two year old. I have sandy-blonde hair, piercing blue eyes and a nose only a mother could love. I'll get back to that in a minute. I've got a square jaw with a dimple on my chin, (My wife and girlfriend both love that. *wink*). I've got broad shoulders, a muscled torso and arms that looks like they were chiseled from stone, and muscled thighs and calves to match. Yes, I work out. A lot.
My height, you ask? Why does that matter? Did I ask you how old you are? OW! OUCH! SHIT! OKAY, WOMAN! I'M SORRY!! Jeez, you'd think I would have called you a cow the way she started wailing on me. Note to self, never write a story while your wife is standing behind you. OWW! FUCK!! NOT YOU, TOO!! *grumbles* damn women. *sigh*
Okay, there are two things about me that, in the past, *looks behind my shoulder to see if I'm going to get hit* women have been turned off by from the get-go. Number one, my nose. It's hideously crooked, flat, and I can barely breath out of it some days. How'd it happen? Well, cue ten-year-old me climbing a tree at my grandparents house and slipping on a branch to fall to the ground ten feet below and landing face first on an exposed root. Grandpa found me about twenty minutes after it happened, unconscious, only because I didn't come when Grandma called out the back door that lunch was ready.
They rushed me to the hospital where the doctors were amazed that I had no other injuries, not even a concussion, besides my broken nose. Oh, I had scrapes and bruises. Those were inevitable. But my beautiful nose decided to break my fall so the rest of my body could be spared. What a sacrifice. They did what they could to set the bone and open the nasal passages but without surgery, that my parents couldn't afford, I'd be disfigured for the rest of my life, and here I am.
The number two reason most women are immediately turned off by me, my height. *mumbles* I'monlyfivefootfour.
*SMACK, SMACK*
OW! FUCK! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU TWO!! Grrrr. I'm only five-foot-four! There, you happy now, woman!?... ...You know what? Out! Both of you, so I can write this story in peace! No, no pouting. Get out.
*SMACK, SMACK!*
*squealing in pain*
*squealing in pain that turns into a seductive moan*
*slams and locks door*.
Okay, where was I? Oh, me, right. Well, I guess that's all the important information so let's get the story started, shall we? It starts just after my high school graduation. I had taken some shared courses and CLEP'd out of a bunch of classes so that, by the time I started college in the fall, I started my sophomore year.
I first met Julie on the first day of biology class. I was late and she was sitting alone at the only double desk that had a vacated chair. I was immediately mesmerized by her beauty, with golden-blonde hair and blue eyes to match mine. A pert nose and full, luscious lips just begging me to bite. She had dimples on each cheek when she smiled and my heart just melted when she did. I was smitten. I was further smitten when I saw her body as she stood up to let me behind her to take my seat. She had what could only be described as a perfect hourglass figure with modest breasts, an ass that made me want to cry, it was so round and firm, and legs that went on for days.
Alas, she was about three inches taller than me so I put any thoughts of tapping that ass out of my head immediately. We hit it off as friends from the get-go and before long, we were inseparable. Well, at school, anyway. We had other lives outside of school but at school, we were the best of friends. My buddies all asked me when I was planning on hooking up with her but I just shook my head and said it would never happen, effectively putting myself in the friend-zone. They tried to hook up with her, though. Every one of them tried but were all shot down like world war one dogfighters going up against the Red Baron.
A couple of months into our first semester, one of my so-called friends actually grabbed her crotch after she shot him down for the third time. Needless to say, that didn't go over well for him. She kicked him in the balls and gave him two black eyes. She knew how to box, apparently. I, seeing it happen, was already on my way over to stomp a mud-hole in his ass when she stopped me. Told me it wasn't worth it, but, amazingly, right in front of the guy, she kissed me. Not on the cheek, but the lips! I was floored! I was stupefied! No way that just happened!! But it did. "Thank you, though," she told me with a coquettish smile. I just nodded like a dumbass, absently licking her watermelon lipgloss off of my lips. She grabbed my hand and led me, numbly, to our next class.
After that day, our relationship changed. No longer was I in the friend-zone, but more of the boyfriend zone without actually being in the boyfriend zone. *SMACK* OW!! HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET IN HERE!! OUT, GOD DAMMIT!! Fucking hell! *rubs head* I'm gonna get a concussion from those two! To clarify, yes, we were openly dating, but neither one of us wanted to pursue a committed relationship at that time because we weren't sure what the future held for us.
*peeks over shoulder*
FUCKING HELL! OUT! IF I CATCH EITHER ONE OF YOU IN HERE AGAIN BEFORE I'M DONE WITH THIS STORY, I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL STRAP YOU BOTH TO THE WALL NAKED FOR AN HOUR!! GOT IT!?!?
*giggling*
WITH THE A/C BOTTOMED OUT!!
*giggling stops abruptly*
"But, we're pregnant!" Jules says.
And? Pregnancy doesn't absolve you of punishment, especially when you're acting like impish little cretins!