Months passed and my torture continued. One day I was jerking off to cuckold porn and fantasizing about my wife with Greg, I was totally, mentally crushed by my sick obsession. It was not getting better; it was clearly getting worse. The days between their love making sessions I spent hours watching cuckold porn, praying that Greg would stop by and take my wife before me. The days that he would fuck her would always start with my heart beating frantically and a rock-hard penis. However, once my penis had puked out its little bubble of cum, my mind would fill with terrible, hateful thoughts and a feeling of personal disgust. One moment I would be relishing in the sight of my wife having earth shattering orgasms on her lover's superior cock. The next, my eyes were filled with tears, my mind fretting over whether my wife was still mine. This sick cycle needed to end.
I sat with Pam during one of my down times and told her what was going through my mind. She listened intently and waited till I stopped talking before she responded. She took a deep breath then became very serious. She began by saying that I was the one that wanted this originally. I was the one that slowly groomed her to become a Hot Wife. It was I that chose Greg to be her Bull. It was my cuckold obsession that brought on the predicament I was now in. She said that because she loved me so much, she had searched my internet history to find out exactly what I liked and what I wanted. She wanted to give me the experience that I saw in those videos.
She continued. Had things gotten extreme? Yes, but she had never pushed the envelope further than any video I had ever watched. In fact, she told me that she had made it a point to play out the scenario's, scene by scene, so that I would get the full mind fucking effect. Had she come to enjoy our lifestyle? Yes, absolutely. Pam said that Greg was an amazing lover with abilities that I did not have to take her to places she had never been sexually. Greg was a master at the art of making a woman feel small and vulnerable yet protected and loved all at the same time. He had an Alpha Male vibe that I did not possess. In fact, she said that she realized shortly after her first encounter with Greg, that I was a beta and could never be an Alpha Male. This is why she had me purchase the pink panties. She wanted me to know my position in the relationship and to accept it. Wearing the pink panties was a visual admission of my beta position.
Pam said that she was happy with our new dynamic and that Greg was now part of our life. I sputtered a bit and tried to protest. She put her finger to my lips to silence me. She then sternly reiterated that Greg was here to stay and that it was time for me to accept that I got exactly what I wanted. I again began to protest. I told her that I wanted our old life back. I wanted Greg gone. I wanted to make love to her again. I wanted it all to be normal again. Pam stared back at me with a blank look. Silence filled the room. Then finally after what seemed like hours she said, "Ok, I will make you a deal. If you never watch another porn video and you never talk to me about cuckolding again, I will never fuck Greg again. If I catch you watching porn again, your fate will be sealed." I began to shake. Fuck, I thought, I can do this, this is my chance to fix my stupid mistake. I immediately agreed. Pam smiled, then laughed and told me she had nothing to worry about because I had no will power and would be jerking off to cuckold porn in an hour. Her comment pissed me off and I told her that. She stood up and said, "good luck, I bet you won't make it 10 minutes." She walked away giggling to herself.
I got up from the couch and went and took a cold shower. I needed to get my head straight. Only I could make this happen. After my shower I mowed the lawn and did the yard work I had neglected for months. Once I finished, I took another shower, this one hot. My penis reacted and wanted attention. I obliged by thinking about fucking my wife for the first time in months, bareback. It only took a minute before I shot my load. My cum fell to the shower floor and slid down the drain. I smiled, at least it was not in a condom, covered in piss and flushed down the toilet. I was making progress. The rest of the day, I tried to stay busy. Occasionally my mind wandered but for the most part I did well.
At the end of the day, I caught Pam looking at my search history. She turned to me and said she was impressed; she had assumed I would have looked at porn by now. I smiled proudly. We went to bed, and she allowed me to snuggle her. Fuck, this felt good. The next day was a workday, and it was crazy. By the time I got home I was so tired I ate, then went to bed. Again, we snuggled. It was just like the old days. Day three was like the day before. When I got home Pam was waiting for me. She was dressed in her skintight Lycra shorts and sports bra. Nothing was left to the imagination. She had my computer in her hand. She smiled and told me how proud she was of me and told me that come Saturday, someone was going to get some bareback pussy. She then gave me an evil smile and said, "Now will it be you or Greg? I guess that's up to you." My penis nearly exploded in my pants. I had three days to be good and focused. I knew I could do it. The prize was too valuable to lose.