Winter Brea

Briefly home from college, I realize I'm going to have to take up some sort of work. It's the last thing I want to do, especially having just survived several weeks of exams, but I figure it'll take my mind off of how quiet my parents' house is, and how little I actually have to do.

"Why don't you watch the Clarence kids?" My mom suggests, at breakfast. "Kara's ten and Ethan's seven. That's shouldn't be too hard." Inwardly, I groan. Children aren't my strong suit, but she's right, older ones are easier to talk to. I tell her to set it up for next Monday. Maybe I'll have developed either an inheritance or some nurturance skills by then.

Sunday night, I sign online from my childhood bedroom. It feels better to use my laptop than the hulking monster in the family room, plus I know the noise from the older model would keep my parents awake. Sighing, I'm not surprised to see that none of my new college friends are online. They've probably got better things to do, I thought. Might as well wallow in self-pity, right? I check a couple of email addresses, read the news on Google, and wander around some friends' online journals before remembering something I'd been meaning to check out for awhile now. A few weeks ago, my friend Brian told me about how he met his current boyfriend on an adult message board.

"He's the same age as us and everything, not some older creep," he said, promising to email me the site's address. I didn't bother telling him that I wouldn't mind chatting with someone a little older, especially about sex, considering the shitty experiences I'd had so far at school. I pull up the site and pause when asked to create a username. Think, think. Diana? Taken. I didn't want to use anything like my real name, but didn't want to make up some 'starfuck6969' type of thing either. Brenda? Sounds like something from a John Hughes movie. I finally type in 'Lucy,' thinking of the slutty vampire from Stoker's Dracula. Sexy movie, I think, making dracula my password and logging on. Immediately, a few messages pop up: Hi, a/s/l type of stuff. They sound mostly like eager high school students looking to jerk one before Mommy tucks them into bed. I've already begun a good game of solitaire when 'Mark44' appears on the screen.

Mark44: New here?

I pause, double-clicking an ace before answering.

Lucy: How do you figure?

Mark44: Never seen the username, that's all.

Makes sense, I think, smiling a little. I close the game and widen your window.

Lucy: So you've been here awhile, I guess?

Mark44: Haha, long enough I guess. How old r u?

I roll my eyes, here we go. 'R' and 'U' – never good signs.

Lucy: 19. You?

Mark44: (points to username)

I smirk. Forty-four, huh. I thought it might be your football number or something. I check the clock, nearly 2 a.m. I reach over and click off the lamp and the room dims to black.

Mark44: Hello? Am I too old for u?

Lucy: No, that's okay...I don't mind.

Mark44: What're you up to tonight?

Lucy: Oh...nothing. I'm home for Christmas. You?

Mark44: You're in college? What are u studying.

Lucy: Economics for now. I'm thinking about changing to political science or something.

Mark44: What r u wearing, lucy?

I freeze. This seemed like a sexy idea, in theory, but maybe it wasn't so smart. What if you hack my profile and figure out where I'm typing from, start stalking me or something? What if you're, like, 80 instead of 44? I have to remind myself that just because I tell the truth online, not everyone does the same. I know I should probably just sign off, but something makes me really want to continue. Maybe it feels kind of bad and wrong, but it also feels good. It feels sexy. My mind wanders to whether or not you're already fondling yourself, maybe through your work slacks or soft pajamas. Thinking about your cock getting hard as you talk to me...I can't help it, it turns me on...what if I remind you, a little, of your babysitter? Your stepdaughter? I can't sign off now. I'm hooked.

Lucy: Um...a short skirt, underwear, and a t-shirt.

Mark44: What kind of underwear?

Lucy: Pink. It's sort of stretchy.

Mark44: No bra?

Lucy: No...no bra.

There is a pause. I feel my pussy heating up. Did someone interrupt you? Please don't be gone, I hope silently.

Mark44: lucy, do you want to play a game?

Lucy: ...maybe?

Mark44: Haha, do you have a webcam.

My mind races. Did I bring my webcam back from school? Yes, I packed it to give to my mom for Christmas, so she could see me in my room from time to time. I leave the laptop and forage through my duffel bags until I find the small attachment.

Mark44: r u there?

Lucy: Yes, I have one. Sorry.

Mark44: No problem, lucy. Why don't u hook it up so we can really chat.

I run the cable into the port and click on the screen. I pause before sending him the share link – do I really want a stranger to see me? What's going to happen next? Without thinking too much, I send the link. I don't want to think. I want to get off with you, I realize. I lean back slightly on the bed and wait.

Mark44: I can see u now, cool. Can you move the cam up a little?

Lucy: Yeah, sure.

Mark44: Ok. Wow lucy, u have an amazing body.

Lucy: Thank you, that's nice of you to say.

Mark44: I can see your nipples through your t-shirt, r they hard

I close my eyes for a second. I'm getting hot. I squirm a little and reply.

Lucy: Yeah, they're hard.

Mark44: Why don't u touch them for me, lucy.

Without responding, I slowly bring my fingers up to my breasts, which are straining gently against my thin t-shirt, and graze my nipples. I run my fingertips lightly over them, making them even harder and more visible through the fabric.

Mark44: Mmm yeah. Lift up your shirt, lucy..show daddy your titties.

I'm shocked, but my eyes close a little at your little nickname – I've always secretly fantasized about calling a guy 'daddy,' but never wanted to freak him out. I take a breath, and roll up the hem of my shirt up above my breast, lingering at the nipples. They bounce free, and I start rolling my nipples between my thumbs and forefingers, pulling gently. I love feeling pressure here. Boys have always complimented my breasts – the size, roundness. I wonder if you're really stroking it now. I hope so.

Mark44: I love your titties. They look so sweet and juicy. Pull hard on your nipples for me, ok?

I pull harder, and pinch. My pussy is really hot now, I'm dying to touch it. Will you sign off before asking me to?

Mark44: My cock is hard now, lucy. Why don't u spread your legs and show me your little pussy?

I sigh hard and shift lower against the pillows behind me, lifting my legs up over the laptop and sliding my pink panties off and onto the floor. The sudden cold air of the room against my bare pussy (which I started shaving when I left for college) makes my clit ache a little. I spread my legs wide around the laptop's glow and lift my skirt up onto my stomach, exposing everything. I feel like a slut but I want to touch myself so bad I can barely breathe.

Mark44: u shave? Very hot. Go ahead and rub your hot little pussy for daddy.

I lick my two of my right fingers and gently, carefully touch them to my pussy, which is already pretty wet and warm. I lean my head back and use my other hand to pull my lips apart. I feel like a little whore, performing like this for you, old enough to be my father, but my slick fingers feel so good against my stiff clit, I can't stop moving them in little circles, teasing pleasure out of my body until it hurts. I look up and lick my lips at the camera, then smile. I can't help but be dirty and I want you to be as turned on as I am.

Mark44: Mmmm rub your little shaved pussy for me, yeah. I want to lick you all over, lucy, I want to suck on your hot teen clit and flick my tongue against your asshole. Can I play with your ass? Please let daddy suck on you, lucy..

God...I rub my clit faster now, imagining an older, slightly bearded face on my pussy, replacing my fingers with the tip of his hot tongue, then tracing wet circles down to my ass, gently rimming me until I scream, pinching my nipples until they bruise...I open my eyes wide and place my hands on the keyboard. I need you.

Lucy: Ohh I want to sit on your cock.

Mark44: Yeah? Need something in your pussy? Do u need my hard cock inside you?

Lucy: mmm yeah, I want to lift up my skirt and push down all the way on you while you suck hard on my nipples and rub my clit with your wet thumb. I want to ride you, feel you push up into me harder and harder, I want you to beg me to cum on your cock and reach back and finger my ass, just tickle it while you pound into my hot pussy oh god

Mark44: Fuck, fuck, lucy, I'm going to cum inside you

Lucy: Watch me make myself cum for you

I push the laptop back and lift my legs up, pulling them back at the knees. My t-shirt is still pushed up over my breasts and I pull one up and lower my tongue to my nipple, imagining what that's doing to you. I slowly ease into touching my pussy again, feeling all the wet juice and smearing it all over, around and on my clit. I think about how easily I could take a cock all the way in right now, in one thrust, how good it would feel to be filled all the way up...I rub and pinch my clit, panting softly, pushing one finger into my pussy so I can feel myself cum on it in almost painful waves. I use my other hand to tease my nipples back to attention and then to prod my asshole. I feel the orgasm approaching long before it hits and press harder against my ass, into my pussy, on my clit, feeling my own two hands ravaging myself and wishing like hell they were yours. I cum hard and my pussy clamps down on the finger inside, it pulses forever and I keep rubbing, even when it hurts and the feeling of abandon has subsided. I pull my fingers away from my pussy, lick them clean, and look up. You've signed off, but I have a feeling we'll meet again soon.