I sighed inwardly as I stared past the club's colorful lights and took another shot of tequila. Casamigos had become my favorite the past couple of months. I enjoyed the burn it left in my esophagus; it was something of a comfort, knowing I was well on my way to inhibiting my emotions.
"Another, baby?" The bartender, Winter, always took care of me on nights where we both worked. I was always grateful; sometimes the club was stingy and expected us to have clients pay for our shots. Winter was my age, except she had twin girls and a fiancé. She was always talking about her kids. Sometimes it annoyed me, but other times it was admirable to see how devoted she was to her family. She often talked about how she didn't plan on working here much longer, how she was going to quit before the end of the year, how she couldn't wait to see the look on her Richard's face the day she went home and told him that she would never step foot into this club ever again. The plan was to save up enough by Christmas, enroll her girls into a private elementary school, and then work on her getting esthetician degree. She's talked about "the plan" for the past two and half years that I've known her. The last time we had that conversation was early in February, right before Valentine's Day, when she was stressing over what lingerie to surprise Richard with.
It was now mid October.
"Please." I told her, scouting the crowd for viable prey. She looked around to see if the management was anywhere near us and poured two shots, handing me one. In ritual, she raised her shot glass and exclaimed, "Arriba!" I mimicked her words and arm movements in broken Spanish, "Abajo! Al Centro, Pa´ Dentro!" I finished the shot in one swig, declining her offer for a lime. The blazing sensation in my throat ignited my vivacity.
I wasn't always a drinker. In fact, drinking used to make me sick more often than not. My enjoyment started off slow; a small shot prior to a date, a drink during my lunch break, two shots before I went on stage. Drinking granted me a lead onto the things that I didn't want to handle and things just sort of happened to go my way. It made them less crucial. Right now, I was four shots into the night and the feeling of suspension was just starting to overcome me.
"Thank you, my love," I cooed to Winter. She winked at me as she poured beer for the newly formed crowed around countertop.
"My God, you're beautiful." I heard from behind me. I prepared my smile before I turned around.
"Thank you, baby," was my automatic response as I elegantly twirled to verify my accomplice. He was an older gentleman, around 50 or so, well dressed, and clean cut. He had no name brand clothing on, no jewelry to note, and a little bit of a gut.
Not bad to start off the night, I thought.
"Where are you from? Wait, let me guess." He used the opener as an excuse to scrutinize my features, starting at my lips and pausing at my breasts, extending all the way down to my legs and toes. "Some type of Middle Eastern."
"I get that a lot," I giggled. "Care to venture another guess?"
"Latina?"
"I get that too," I smiled, "I'm actually Greek and Italian. Well, my mother is, anyway. I never met my father." I noted a gleam in his eye.
Too easy, way too easy.
I found it fascinating how such a simple line aroused them.
"Well, wherever you're from, you're stunning." I fake blushed. "Would you do me the honor of blessing me with a dance?"
Hooked and reeled.
He led me to his table. I got to work, allowing the feeling of alcohol to flow through me. The strobe lights seemed unbar the wall of hesitancy that arose any time I gave my first dance of the night. They sliced through the club, reaching me last, and forced me to observe the environment around me. I watched as they bounced off me, off the patrons, off my client and invoked an all-consuming echo that entrapped everyone in the same room. We were all here for the same reason. Here, we were the same, no one above nor below one another. My reflection was apparent in every face that I locked eyes with. I never felt more empowered than during the high of my first dance.
I shook my ass in his face, slapping it lightly, arching my pussy towards his lips. Of course, he wouldn't touch it and of course, it was covered under my diamond studded thong, but I wanted him to know what he wasn't getting and what he would never get. I wanted him to crave me, salivate over the sheerness of me, the closeness of me. I wanted to enlighten him the way I was enlightened at this moment. I wanted him to yearn for the touch of my skin, the brush of my lips, the tickle of my hair. I guided his hands to my breasts and let him massage little circles over my nipples. I nearly screeched at the high; the entire club jumping, everyone watching, his friends howling at his table... I loved every second of it.
But every high has a comedown, and as the music changed, the voices lulled and the strobe lights illuminated my client's face, reminding me of what he looked like. My dance slowed and I peeled myself off his lap.
I said nothing as I evenly pulled my bra back on, covering my breasts. His friend came up to me and handed me a crisp $100. "Thanks so much darlin´," he smiled kindly and spoke in a southern drawl, "It's his birthday today and he hasn't been out in a long time." I looked to my client for verification and saw that he was in something of a daze, laying back in his seat, shyly peaking at the rest of the dancers. I thanked him and searched for my next seizure of the night.
One by one, piece by piece, I set my snares and entangled them in my clasp. I confined them to my emanation, they slipped onto me, willingly, spilling over my leaking vibrations. It was too easy... Too easy. Every so often I would make my way over to the bar and wordlessly share a moment with Winter. She invoked a fire inside of me, and I was ready, casting my gaze over the deconstructed pieces of the night.
It all happened rather suddenly. To this day, I couldn't tell you what he looked like, what his features consisted of, or what he was wearing. However, I can recall the tremble in my soul. The sudden deafness of the club was enough to assemble my attention. The pause in the DJ's mix wasn't by accident, nor was the momentary illumination of the club's lights, nor was our instantaneous eye contact. I didn't think -- rather, reacted-- in moving towards him with effortless flow. I reached him with a blank mind and a wordless scan. He didn't speak, either. The lights dimmed once again and I felt fearful, as if he would disappear if I let him out of my sight. As I adjusted to the dark, I searched my mind for the words, looked for an indication of his resistance, and waited.
"Hello, beautiful." He said. The compliment was empty and automatic. He looked passed me as he said it, though he was peering into my eyes.