Janie sat in the train, her head touching the window as she looked outside at the changing scenery, her favorite song playing on her headphones, her mind slowly drifting away. She was heading to the big city, crashing at her aunt's and uncle's for a couple of days. She really needed the time off. The last week was really shitty; her horrible boss yelled at her for messing up an important presentation, even though she did exactly what he told her to do; her car died and she didn't have the money to fix it; and her boyfriend for the past three years dumped her out of the blue, telling her he met someone else, and that "it's not you, it's me".
He was her entire world. She did everything for him, she would do anything he asked of her, and he threw her away like garbage.
That's how she felt. Like garbage.
She needed to clear her head. She needed to be spoiled rotten by her aunt, go shopping with her cousin, do nothing for a couple of days, party for a couple of nights, and get her head straight.
She kept staring outside, enjoying the sun on her face, mindlessly stroking her long braid. The train car was almost empty, except for an old couple a few rows behind her, and a bunch of teenagers busy playing a game or something on their phones. Her station was the last station, so she knew it would be ok to doze off, and so she did.
"Excuse me, is this seat taken?"
Janie's mind suddenly woke up in a jolt, as she straightened up in her chair, a little dazed and confused, but suddenly very conscious of the crass hand touching her knee.
"What?", she asked as she took off her headphones, trying to regain focus. "I asked if this sit was taken", he replied, and without actually waiting for an answer the older man bent down to put his briefcase under the seat. He was pretty tall, dressed well, with smooth grey hair combed neatly backwards. She looked around, and while some people must have boarded the train while she was sleeping, there were still a lot of empty seats. Her mouth felt very dry. A million thoughts started to run through her head, trying to assess the situation, and decide if she should just stand up and move.
But she didn't.
The stranger sat down in the chair next to her, putting his arm on the shared armrest between their chairs, the back of his hand just slightly touching hers. Instinctively she moved her own hand away, but not before noticing the little hairs on her arm rising in a small shiver.
Did he do that on purpose?
Her mind came back to his hand touching her knee a couple of minutes ago, her eyes wandered to her legs, and she felt an unexplained urge to pull her short skirt down to cover her legs, as if she were embarrassed by them. She felt warm, like the sun was focusing itself on her, and especially that spot on her knee, the place where he touched her. She almost giggled as a random thought crossed her head, like his touch somehow left a mark on her, like someone branding a cow to mark their ownership. The shiver and the warmth somehow grew bigger simultaneously.
"I'm sorry if I scared you," he said as she realized she was a million miles away again. "No, it's ok. I think... I just... I dozed off for a bit," she managed to say, trying to maintain a normal expression, and not sounding like a blabbering idiot. She looked out the window again, trying to figure out where they were and how long until they reached her station, but she couldn't quite figure it out. She wasn't very familiar with the way, and her brain didn't seem to work properly, like she was still half asleep, and her mind was still foggy.
He didn't say anything after that, and after a couple of minutes of silence she became too uncomfortable and just had to break it.
"My aunt is waiting for me at the station," she said, not sure why she felt he needed to know that. "Grow up," she thought to herself, "you sound like a frightened little girl."
She wasn't a little girl!
But as if he were reading her mind, he replied: "That's good. The city can be a dangerous place for little girls all by themselves."
"Excuse me?! I'm not a little girl!" she blurted out and immediately felt even stupider.
Why did she say that? Why did she need to feel the need to impress this total stranger? This man, who looks old enough to be her father. This man she was frightened of just a few seconds ago. Why did she need him to know she is a grown woman and not a... that she's not a little girl.
He didn't immediately respond but just stared at her for a minute. She felt his gaze on her, his eyes moving up and down her body. She unconsciously tugged her skirt again. For a second she thought he's not going to reply at all, and her childish retort would keep hanging between them, but finally he said: "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to sound like that".
She felt relieved, and once again confused by her own feelings.
"That's ok. I wasn't
