If a dog is man's best friend, then surely a car is a woman's best friend. A car gives you independence, safety, pride of possession, status, all those nice things. But the mirror has two faces, and a car can also get into some situations you wouldn't exactly seek out for yourself.
My own black early-eighties Cherokee was my pride and joy throughout my happy years at Hamner. It was old, true, and rather banged-up, but it ran well and I kept it very clean inside and out. It was big enough for several friends to pile in so we could go off on adventures of all kinds, from a trip to Florida to simple midnight runs for doughnuts.
I say it ran well. Until the day I noticed a slight, but nonetheless persistent irritating rattle that seemed to come from the dash. It wasn't constant, and you couldn't hear it at all if the radio was up loud enough, but it was noticeable when starting or stopping the car and especially when turning sharply. I had a look-see under the hood, but my automotive knowledge is limited mainly to tire inflation, tuning radio stations, and pumping gas and all those areas looked to be okay. The washer fluid level was okay.
I had to face the fact that I would have to take my baby in somewhere to be looked at and fixed, and that would undoubtedly cost me bukku dollars, which were not exactly in abundant supply. That's where Krista came to my rescue.
Krista was a girl in my dorm who could always be counted on to know the best place to go to get any goods or services at the lowest possible costs. A lot of people mistrusted her advice after the debacle of the place where you could get dirt-cheap Buffalo Wings that sickened half the dorm, but I went to her with my car trouble, and sure enough, she came through. She promised to do some research and get back to me.
A few hours later, I was sitting in the lounge watching Montell chatting up overweight drag queens battered by their partners when Krista came sidling into the room. She slunk past me and, spy like, tucked a scrap of paper into my hand and then vanished again. She really liked that Mata Hari shit.
I unfolded the paper and read the words "Moe's Motors, ask for Pee Wee." Oh, joy. That was a pair of names to inspire confidence if I ever heard one. Moe's Motors turned out to be located in a rather seedy part of town. I spoke first to an equally seedy-looking character who introduced himself as Moe, who didn't take the toothpick out of his mouth the entire time I talked to him. In fact, I never saw him without it. For all I know, it grew there. "Could I talk to Pee Wee?" I asked. "I've got a Cherokee with a rattle."
"Pee Wee ain't here just now."
"Oh, well, can you tell me when he will be in?"
"Judge says he could be out in eight months with good behavior." I must've looked crushed, because Moe said quickly "Don't worry though, Miss. Duane can take care of you."
Have you ever noticed that, about car types? They never take care of your vehicle, they take care of you.
"Okay, thanks, where do I find Duane?" I asked.
"Right behind you" said a new voice. I turned around quickly. I'm not sure what I expected to see, probably a Moe look-alike. I found myself facing a guy about my own age, well over six feet and very "built." His hair, in my much-admired ponytail, was a little blonder than mine. And the eyes were... omigod, omigod- absolute ice blue, and looking straight down into my dark hazel ones.
I felt my cheeks burning hot pink and had to make an effort not to let my jaw drop or my mouth spread into a silly love struck smile. I am quite sure Duane, and most likely Moe too, took notice of this, though they didn't say anything about it.
I went through my spiel again as Duane and I walked out to my jeep, all the time trying not to stare. He wore jeans that were quite tight, and left little to the imagination. They'd have looked better without that cheesy pseudo-Western shirt he had chosen to go with them.
"Start her up," Duane ordered me and I hastened to comply, only dropping my keys twice. The rattle was not audible outside the car, so I suggested we drive around the block a few times. True to form, whenever I braked or turned, there came that that faint but undeniable rattle.
I was rattled myself, driving around with Duane's blue gaze seemingly pinned on me. He sat sidewise in the seat listening without comment and watching me at the wheel and occasionally asking me to brake or turn. Suddenly, he popped open the glove compartment.
"Hey, what are you doing?" I asked, somewhat alarmed. I turned my head to look at him, and he was holding a metal box of Altoid mints and a wrench.
"There's your mysterious rattle," he said, and balanced the box of mints over two fingers with the wrench propped on it. Sure enough the two metallic surfaces clattered faintly against each other. I have never felt like such a moron in my life. What a fool I was, and an expensive fool at that. Swallowing hard, I asked, in the voice like that of a chain-smoker overcome by fear "How much do I owe you?"
"Nothing," came the reply. I raised my eyebrow at him, skeptically. "Nothing at all. If you'll agree to go out with me some time."
Talk about lucky! No actual car problem and no charge for finding that out, except if you call a date with a hunk a price. I didn't. "Oh thank you so much! You've made my day! Of course I'll go out with you. I could even do it tonight if you wanted." I damn near sang my response.