I swear I've tried everything.
I've tried to talk to her.
I've spent thousands of dollars on counseling that didn't work.
I've worked less hours to prioritize time with the kids to give her a much needed break from them on a regular basis.
I've learned new techniques to spice up our sex life.
I've even hired a coach that specializes in this sort of thing.
But no matter what I've tried, she still doesn't seem to care.
She's a great mother and wonderful housemate, but she has no interest in me sexually.
I put up cameras and even hired a private investigator just so I know if she's cheating or not but she isn't.
To be honest, I kind of wish she was.
We don't fight and I never raised my voice at her, but yet she still goes numb when it comes to the bedroom.
Little conversations we do have are usually about managing the family, finances or the kids. But never about us and especially never about sex.
Leaving her or my family is out of the question because I still love her and I definitely love my family. Plus our arrangement just makes sense logistically.
So what was I supposed to do? I cheated on her. Many times. Any time I could With whoever I could.
I finally got the sex I was looking for, even some sex I didn't know I wanted.
But I still wasn't fulfilled. I still wanted her.
Something deep down in me. I thought that if I cheated on her she would catch me and that would at least get her attention and start the conversation that I've been wanting to have.
I've gone so far as to leave phone numbers in my pants pocket expecting her to find them what she does laundry on the weekends.
But all she did was bring them to me before she washed like it wasn't a big deal.
I legit don't think she cared.
I was at my wits end and unsure what to do.
I was starting not give a fuck either.
That's when my final play came to mind...
Laura was a young lady I would meet up with and fuck regularly. She knew I was married and I think that turned her on because she let me do anything and everything to her.
I don't even know much about her but she's always so eager to hook up when we're both available and I've missed that type of enthusiasm.