Andrew and Charlotte quickly slipped away from the group during the scheduled break time, before group activities resumed, to process everything that had just occurred. Still reeling from a state of bewilderment and embarrassment, neither was quite ready to discuss the shocking prior events but found comfort in their shared alone time to sort through their thoughts.
On the far side of a small meadow behind the wellness center, they located the entrance to a hiking trail indicated on the map of the grounds. It was a small path, making a half-mile loop which crossed a gurgling brook twice via wooden bridges. They passed for a while under the wide canopy of trees, the spangle of light filtering down upon them, until they began to relax and come to terms with what they had become involved in. Finding a comfortable seat at the edge of the second bridge, dangling their feet over the water, Andrew began to examine the list of activities that they had been provided. There was a free swim at the pool, a yoga session, a campfire, and various other events scheduled to take place.
"So..." Charlotte finally ventured to say. "Did you... um... want to discuss that stuff Mariana requested?"
Andrew began to grow nervous; he was anticipating having to share his own fantasies with his wife but was hoping to have enough time to come up with something diplomatic and safe to offer her. Charlotte had shared a fantasy that involved the two of them but truthfully Andrew fantasized about all sorts of women he found attractive. He grew increasingly concerned about what her reaction would be if she discovered that his mind sometimes wandered to sources of arousal besides her.
Would she be jealous? Angry? He didn't exactly want to find out, even if he didn't feel guilty on account of it being limited to his imagination.
"Er... okay," Andrew mumbled. Charlotte could see he was anxious about it.
"All right, so... what do you fantasize about?" she asked, looking up at him thoughtfully. Charlotte had become genuinely curious; it would suddenly be a new dimension to her husband that he'd never opened up about before. She wasn't sure how she'd feel yet, especially since she didn't exactly know what he fantasized about. Charlotte hoped it was about her but also prepared herself for the fact that maybe it wasn't.
"I dunno... Not much really. I guess I just remember stuff we've done. Like that ski trip we took to Vermont where we got pretty wild in our hotel room."
Charlotte looked at him silently for a few moments. "Really? That's it? You don't imagine any, um, scenarios or anything?"
This wasn't true, of course, but he didn't know what to safely tell her. Charlotte scratched her head, having the sense that Andrew wasn't feeling able to open up but didn't know how to make him feel safer. She knew he could be as shy as she was, so she wasn't surprised, but the need had clearly arisen for a different tactic.
"You must have had those thoughts at some point," she said. "How about this... What did you use to fantasize about? Like, maybe before we met?" Charlotte wasn't sure if she wanted to give him an out but, on the other hand, she knew she had to take baby steps for them to find a way to open up more to each other.
Andrew was surprised to hear her press the issue, but he suddenly felt relief that she had given him a partial way out. If what he described happened before they met, he couldn't be judged for it. Andrew pondered the question for a moment, realizing that he'd fantasized about a great many things, and still did, so the choices were endless. However, having just seen the scheduled events, the pool, in particular, he recalled one thing that stood out in his head.
"Well..." he began, "There was one thing I used to think about a lot."
"Okay. Tell me?"
"Do you remember how I told you I used to be on the swim team back in high school?"
"Yeah."
"One of the first things I did when I got to college was to try out for the swim team. This was a little bit before we met. I didn't make it on the team but I used to go train so I could give it a shot." Charlotte nodded as he continued. "Anyway, we used to practice doing laps, timing each other, while the women did the same in the other lanes. One day, after practice, we hit the lockers and one of the guys said something that surprised me."
"What?" Charlotte asked, perking up.
"Well, he had heard that there was a time in Minnesota or somewhere when swimming was done in the nude at school. "
"Seriously? Did that really happen?"
"I went home and looked it up and apparently he was right. I even saw some old photos of it. So, uh, I used to think about that I guess."
"What did you fantasize about, exactly?"
Andrew smiled nervously and shrugged so Charlotte rubbed his back. "I shared my fantasy, so you gotta share yours," she chuckled.
"Okay," he sighed.
"Don't be embarrassed. At least you're not telling it in front of a bunch of strangers like I did!"
"True!" Andrew laughed, then continued. "I guess I just imagined what it would be like if we had to do that while practicing for the team. Like... how terrifying it would be to have to change out of my clothes in the locker room and line up completely naked with the other guys, knowing that I was about to walk out to the pool naked in front of all the girls."
"But the girls would be naked too, right? Or would they be wearing bathing suits?"
"No, I mean, we all would be naked; the girls wouldn't be allowed to wear bathing suits either. I would fantasize about stepping out of the locker room with my friends for the first time, all anxious but also excited to see the girls in that state. Like, um, we'd see the door to the girls' locker room open and they'd all walk out totally naked, just as nervous as us, completely embarrassed because we'd be able to see their bodies..."
