deAngelo Brighton was the only one at the party that knew that the party was actually for a wedding. Fitting, as that is something the Maid of Best Men ought to know.
It was Halloween.
It was Samhain.
It was 3 AM.
And at this point, the music was loud and penetrative. Everyone was in costume. deAngelo was dressed as the white rabbit who had seen better days as his white frizzy hair looked like doll fluff escaping his head. He stood at the door to the back room waiting for the second witness to join him. He looked like a crazed bouncer. But he was rolling with it. Even if he had to decline dancing with an undead Rapunzel, a hijabi Sailor Moon, and a corrupted Angel with blood stained wings and Harlequin clown make up. That last one was the hardest as he was so hung in his booty shorts that he coulda been a sexy coat rack with wings.
Talisman, the Best Man of Maids, was dressed in puppy ears, a collar and a chest harness, showing off his new flat chest; the top surgery scars were barely visible as a sexy nurse, a faerie queen, and someone who was dressed as Madonna from the 1980s, took turns slurping jello shots off his twink body.
"Are you quite done?" The earpiece in his ear buzzed with deAngelo's voice.
Talisman chuckled. "Alright, ladies, I need to stretch my legs a spell. Enjoy the party. I'll be back. Especially for you." He said as he leaned in to kiss the taste of the jello from the faerie queen's lips. Then danced his way back to where deAngelo was waiting.
"Relax, I'm not that late. Are they even here yet?"
"Should be. The Pope too." deAngelo said then looked Talisman up and down a moment, heat in his gaze. "You look good, I hate to have cut your fun short, but they wanted it done during the witching hour."
"I know. The party is going till dawn. I have time to go back to it, once it's over."
"You do, but I thought you wanted to come home with me tonight"
"I can't have a little fun before that?"
"I didn't say that, I just want you sober when you're in my bed."
"Oh is that a rule?"
"Yes. In fact it is. I want you to remember your time with me, not have it hazed in a blur of just some after party fun"
Talisman looked at deAngelo and bit his lower lip. "C'mon, we got a wedding to witness"
And he opened the door to the back room and went inside. Watching his ass as he walked in after him, deAngelo took a deep breath as the door closed behind them. The sound of the music dimmed significantly as they walked down the low lit hall to a second set of doors. They had someone dressed as C3PO playing Bouncer.
"You two are the witnesses, I suspect?"
"Maid of Best Men, deAngelo Brighton."
"Best Man of Maids, Talisman Hotchkiss"
C3PO checked his phone, to see that those were indeed the names on the list. "Splendid, in you go" he opened the door like an awkward butler and the two of them went inside. The two brides were there waiting.
One of them was a 4'7" tall pirate with a tricorn hat over short pink hair that was bobbed and framed her brown face beautifully. Her flat bosom, valiantly showed off its cleavage in a low cut frilly top, and her leather mini skirt matched her flat knee-high leather boots. The glittery pink nail polish matched her pink hair. She looked up as the two witnesses entered the room.
"About time!" she drawled in her Southern accent.
Her betrothed lifted her head at the sound of her voice, and she sat forward in the chair she was sitting in.
"Good, you're here. Now we just gotta wait for the Pope to come back from the bathroom," Her voice was husky, sultry, like a late night radio host. She was dressed in what could only be described as a variation of Morticia Addams remixed with Ursula from the Little Mermaid. And she was well over six foot tall, probably somewhere over seven foot tall in all actuality. The animatronic tentacles of her dress moved and it made deAngelo gasp.
"Shit, I forgot your dress... was alive." He mumbled. Trying to use humor to mask his fear only succeeded in the tall bride's disturbingly cryptid grin. "I'm the Horror, if someone didn't have a fright from my dress, then I would have taken it personally."
"I thought you were going for spiders, what made you change your mind and go for tentacles?"
"She was set on being a swashbuckling pirate. I wanted to match at least a little."
Said pirate was popping her gum and idly scrolling on her phone when she felt everyone staring at her, she looked up with big doe eyes, vacant and green. "What?"
"Isn't she so adorable?" the tall bride swooned. And that earned a giggle.
"No, you're adorable. Adorably horrifying."
The lustful inhale of breath, in response, became a low growl. "The Pope needs to hurry up, I need to consummate you... if you keep being so cute, I may not be able to wait. I won't be able to help myself. "
"I'm chronically cute, sorry not sorry. You're about to have a life sentence of this cuteness, you better be ready for it. Cos there are no backsies allowed."
"I am looking forward to corrupting you."
Biting her lip, that led to a pout of impatience. "I'm gonna bury my face in-between your legs."
"Not if I bury mine in yours first."
Abruptly or maybe aptly, the Pope entered the room, dressed as the Fifth Doctor of Gallifrey complete with the celery on the lapel. "Sorry, am I fashionably late?" she beamed, and adjusted her big round glasses upon her nose.
"I couldn't get the contacts to work with me, so you're stuck with a slightly inaccurate costume, otherwise I couldn't read the notes for the ceremony. Everyone is here, yes?" she greeted as she shuffled over to the podium, her suit pants too long and she kept nearly tripping over them.
"We were waiting for you, so now, yes everyone is here."
"Spectacular. Is everyone ready?"
The two brides looked at each other.
"Yes." The smaller one said.
"Yes" The taller one echoed.
"Alright, let's get you two married!"
The two brides went to stand before the podium and one witness went to stand on either side of them, Talisman by one bride and deAngelo by the other.
