The age of social media is insane. I cannot believe the validation game on social media could lead me down such depths until I finally experienced it myself.
The year was 2020. In India, Prime Minister Modi declared a National Lockdown owing to Corona Virus in March. Because of all the free time I had on my hands, I started indulging a lot on social media. Reels, posts, memes, videos, you name it, I was into it. I posted a lot, be it dress up videos, dance videos, etc. I even started making Tiktok videos for fun, trying on different trends.
That's when I met Kevin. He was one of my favourite followers. What started off as a nice compliment on my videos, ended up being a good friendship. I realised he lived alone just a few kilometres away from my house. We used to hang out often at his house, having become good friends. It all started one day, as we were chilling on his couch, when he said, "Manisha, do you just do this for fun, or do you want to be serious about these videos?"
"What do you mean, it's just for fun.. Once the pandemic is over I'll be joining law school, having a career and.."
He cut me off with a nod of his head, making me agitated. "Tch Tch.. You could've really been something.." he murmured.
I sat up on the couch, clearly intrigued by his response, "What do you mean I could've been something?"
He came upto where I sat, sat beside me, put an arm around me as showed me my profile from his phone, "Manisha.. Look at your videos.. Look at your views, your likes.. Its not enough.. You could have been a model on Instagram, an actress even, later on, if only you had a little help.."
"What do you mean!! I have 3000 followers on Instagram alone, isn't that something? What did you mean by help?" i asked, feeling insecure about the only thing that I felt I was good at, in recent times. My therapy. My escape.
"It's simple really. You're doing good. But you could be better. You know what, come here.." he said, as i scooted over to lean into his chest, looking downward into his phone, while he fished out a model's Instagram account with one hand and used his other behind my back, caressing and stroking my hair. He showed me a few pictures of her sitting on her knees, looking up, dressed in a short black dress with cat ears as she made a mock intentful pose of pouncing on the viewer with her hands in front of her breasts.
Before I could process what I saw, Kevin chimed in, "See what I mean? People have gotten creative. Look at her engagement. The likes, the comments. Her followers!!"