Slut Summer

-ZERO-

I hated it, but I refreshed Instagram again. Really, I felt like a drone on autopilot. Bree's beautiful smiling face in a skimpy red bikini greeted me. At least it was a new picture. Damn, she was hot. It's not like I wasn't, but it was hard to tell in my baggy pajamas.

Fucking Bree. I missed my roommate from my freshmen year, but more so, and I hate to admit this, I was jealous. She was on a picturesque beach while I was stuck in dumbfuck nowhere, Iowa.

#summervibes

#noregrets

#sdsummer

I groaned and tossed my phone onto the bed. I hated that I was jealous; it wasn't Bree's fault that her parents had money and could afford to stay in Cali all summer, just like the rest of our squad had.

"Honey?"

My Mom's voice made me turn my head and catch her strolling into my room in her waitress uniform, her hair pulled into a messy bun. Her face was worried.

"You can't just sulk here all summer," she said, standing beside my bed. She kept her voice soft, but I knew her well enough to hear the guilt in it.

"I know. I'm sorry, I can't afford to have you stay there all summer. Maybe next year? I'm trying." She said as she fiddled with her apron. "Selfishly, I'm glad you're here, though. I missed you."

She leaned forward and kissed my forehead, and her hand brushed my black hair back from my eyes like when I was little.

I sighed. I did feel like a kid again, stuck at home.

"I know, Mom," my voice came out way too whiny. I can't be mad at here; how could I be? She was working two jobs to help pay for my school, and here I was, lying around in my pajamas, at... I glanced at the clock, noon? Yikes. Maybe I should get a summer job or something. It would, at least, distract me from turning green and stalking my friends' social media.

"I know it's not ideal," she continued with a tinge of regret, "and I'm so sorry I can't spend more time with you."

"I wish that too, Mom, but I understand."

I really did. She was my best friend for so long after Dad left us when I was three.

My Mom gave me her best 'It's okay, kiddo' smile and spoke as if she had the best idea ever. "Why don't you go see your old friends? Stewart's parents were in for dinner last night, and I know they are all back in town, back in his basement." She paused, "I just hate to see you like this."

I gave her a look that said, 'What was she thinking.'

"Ano ba?"

What's wrong? Stewart? Friends was not the right word. We were more like friends of convenience. The downfall of transferring schools in your senior year is that it doesn't leave too many social cliques with openings, so I ended up with Stewart, Warren, and Roy. It spawned from a science project. Sure, I bonded with Stewart. He was fun to compete against for valedictorian. I'm still kind of miffed he beat me. As for the rest of the group? We had a good time playing Dungeons & Dragons, which helped me get through my senior year.

Things changed, though. They all went to Iowa, and I went to San Diego, and we drifted. I changed. I grew. I started dating, figured out my looks, and frankly, I wasn't the same nerd I was last year, even if I still kicked ass in biology.

Them? They seemed stuck in the same pattern. Heck, our group chat seemed to have died many months ago now.

Friends? No way.

"I don't know, Mom," I said, my voice still coming out whiny. Ugh, Court. I was really having a brat summer.

"Come on, you can't just sulk around all summer."

"It's only been a week," I countered.

"It's been three days, Honey. See? You are bored out of your mind. Seeing your friends could help. Getting a job could help, too. Yeah, working sucks, but the cash can't hurt. Really, anything, Honey, to get you out of this rut."

I groaned, but she was right. Of course, Mom was always right.

"Fine, Mom," I said, giving in. "If it will make you happy."

"It will," she said, smiling in victory. "Now, I have to go for my shift. Dinner's in the fridge. Be careful not to cook it too long."

I nodded, already knowing what I'd find in the fridge: a giant sticky note with detailed reheating instructions like she was Gordon Ramsay. It was her way of showing love and reminded me of where I got my OCD.

We shared "I love you" as I flopped onto the bed and stared at the ceiling.

-ONE-

Dinner was adobo, a family recipe, which, of course, was delicious. How could she make such a delicious meal while juggling two jobs when I couldn't even handle school and a part-time job in my freshman year?

After eating, I zoned out online. Auto-play on YouTube was ridiculous, and after trying to learn to fold a fitted sheet, which was impossible, by the way, I knew I needed to do something.

Like, what is this life? Maybe my Mom was right, and maybe, just maybe, seeing my old crew wouldn't be the worst thing in the world?

So, I grabbed my phone with purpose, but instead, my fingers went to Instagram, and Angel, my lab partner, was eating at some fun sushi place. Big mistake. I couldn't help but feel personally attacked.

Okay, screw it. I opened up the old group chat. I stared at the final message that Roy sent 4 months ago, "Is anybody bringing diet coke tonight?"

Nevermind, I decided to go directly to Stewart.

"Hey, I'm bored! Mind if i come over?"

Time ticked away very slowly, and there was no reply. Finally, the typing bubble appeared, and disappeared, and appeared, and disappeared again before it spat out, "I dont know."

I don't know? What does that even mean? What was his deal? We were close just one year ago. Maybe he just didn't want anyone over today? Could he be less clear?

I thought about replying, but really, what was the point? I'd sound so desperate. I resigned myself to more YouTube, maybe looking online for jobs, when the group chat notification lit up.

"Come 2 Stewarts. we miss u 2 Court," Warren wrote.

A few moments later, he wrote a second message: "Wear something nice."

Something nice? Can he not be a sexist jerk for like five seconds?

That meant Warren was at Stewart's, so what gives?

I should probably just forget this whole mess and move on with my life, but what did I have to do tonight? Heck, I had no plans for the whole summer? At least I'd get out of the house this way.

With an overly dramatic sigh, I forced myself out of bed and caught a glimpse in the mirror. After a quick sniff test, I was off to the shower. Man, I really needed it.

Afterward, I felt like a brand new girl, so I seated myself in front of the mirror and instantly started doing my makeup. Man, back in high school, I hardly bothered with this; now, I can't go out without it.

"Wear something nice?" I scoffed and made sure I didn't do too much, just enough to look effortlessly put together.

Standing in just my towel, I looked through the closet. I hadn't realized how much of my wardrobe had evolved since high school. Everything was cuter and well skimpier, too. Bree was definitely a bad influence on me. Or, actually, a really good one. She helped me come out of my shell.

Back in high school, I was such a nerd. I wonder where my thick sweaters and oversized overalls were now?

Based on what they were used to, wearing something nice was unavoidable. I can't believe how I used to dress.

I opened my drawer to grab my underwear, and my cut-off jean shorts caught my eye. Bree cut them; they were way too short, and I only wore them around the dorm room once.

An idea came to my idea. A deliciously evil idea.

If Warren wanted me to wear something nice, maybe Courtney could have some fun to cure her boredom.

I cackled to myself like some silly cartoon witch and pulled them out. Stewart was being weird. Warren was still his sexist self. Roy, I'm sure, hadn't changed either. I could really make them feel uncomfortable. Like, how could they resist this ass in these shorts?

I'd have these fools eating out of the palm of my hand in no time and maybe find a way to survive the summer.

Why did being bad feel so good?

Be honest, Court, maybe being back here is bringing out some nostalgia? Trying to relive your past?

Shut up, Vulcan Court; let's just try to have some fun!

-TWO-

I waited and waited after ringing the doorbell, and nothing happened. What gives?

My hand reached to knock the shit out of the door when my phone received a notification. In the group chat, Warren wrote: "Court just come down to the basement."

Of course. They couldn't even be bothered to open the door for me. Was chivalry really dead?

So, I let myself in, strolling through the familiar foyer, the familiar living room, and the same ugly floral couch that was always there toward the basement. The only change from the past was the clacking of my high heels on the hard floor. The wooden stairs were as creaky and spooky as I remembered. It's one of the worst parts of coming here.

I didn't know what to expect at the bottom of the stairs, but it wasn't this: Stewart, Warren, and Roy sitting around the couch, playing Smash Brothers, and not even acknowledging me.

"Um.... guys?"

They didn't even pause their game; they let out half-hearted hellos. Without thinking, I went to the chair I usually sit in while watching TV. We never played a lot of video games in the past, though, so this was new. I was kind of disappointed they weren't doing a D&D campaign.

Samus, Yoshi, and Snake battled it out on the screen, and I just sat there watching like a dork. I can't believe I traded in the comfort of my bedroom and my phone's screen for this place and that flatscreen. Samus won the game, and Roy did a little cheer.

With the game finally over, they turned to me.

A variety of emotions were evident on their faces. Lust was clear on all their faces, so I guess mission accomplished? There was a lot more than that, though. Warren was clearly trying to overcompensate his awkwardness and pretend to be cool. Roy was clearly embarrassed, but he always looked at me like that. Then there was Stewart, the one I was closest to. The one everything should be the easiest with, but the only one with apparent hurt and resentment written all over him.

Maybe coming here was a mistake?

They didn't even start speaking. We all just sat in silence.

Fuck that.

"What gives? We haven't seen each other in forever. What's with this welcome?"

Without even raising his head, Stewart muttered, "Whose fault is that?" His words were laced with hurt and anger.

All of ours? What is even happening? We drifted, and friend groups can drift apart.

"Sorry?" Like, legit, what was going on?

Roy looked at Warren and Stewart but kept silent. It wasn't his nature to jump in; that was what Warren was for.

"Come on, Court. You bailed on us at winter break, dropped out of the group chat, and waited a week to contact us this summer! We aren't idiots. You were living your best life with your hot friends and moved on. So, why are you even here?"

During that spiel I saw the agreement from Stewart and Roy with their body language. Clearly, they all wanted to get this off their chest, but why? Any of them could have gone to a different school than Iowa. Any of them could have made more effort themselves. It almost felt like they were blaming me for their stagnation. Typical boys blame a woman for all their issues. Although probably true, it wasn't the wisest thing to say. I didn't drag myself out of bed or make myself look this hot just to get into an argument.

The best thing to salvage this situation was to apologize. I focused, ensuring all the annoyance left my voice before I started.

"I'm sorry, guys. Freshman year was an adjustment, to say the least. New state, all new people. Cali is so different than Iowa, you can imagine. Then biology classes, you know, were killer. I don't know. I guess I was going for a clean start. It was rude to not try harder. If you want me to leave, I'll go."

That was as honest as I could be.

Warren raised an eyebrow, "Was that so hard, Court?"

It didn't fix everything, things were still awkward as fuck, but it wasn't a hostile environment anymore. My Mom always said nothing beats a good apology.

"Do you want to play?" Roy asked, already pulling the Joy-Con off his controller and holding it out to me.

I didn't really want to play video games, but whatever. "I guess," I said reluctantly, standing up and reaching over to grab the Joy-Con.

"I'm glad you listened," Warren said.

With the controller in hand, I looked over at Warren, "Pardon?" Immediately I knew what he meant as he leered at my ass. Wear something nice.

"Those shorts are nice. You didn't dress like this back in high school. Were you always a thot, Court?"

Ugh. I sat back down. What was I thinking wearing these? "Can we just play the game?"

If this was what I had in store for me this summer, I really needed to look for a job or find some new friends.

-THREE-

Smash Brothers was not as bad as I hypothesized. If I was going to waste my summer here, I'd prefer we start another D&D campaign, but I was in no position to make demands. Not yet, anyway.

A winner wasn't me, but I was able to eliminate Stewart once with Princess Daisy. Warren, as Snake, was spamming, so that wasn't fun, but everyone else was just playing, so yeah, not horrible.

It did bring with it a weird sense of nostalgia. Not altogether unpleasant, but not altogether pleasant either. Sure, it was comforting to go back into an old routine, but there was a feeling that I moved past this. Like I did not belong here anymore.

After Stewart's Yoshi knocked me off the platform, I felt parched.

"I need some water. I'll be back," I used my best Arnold impersonation, immediately realizing how bad it was. I hated how much of a nerd I was at heart.

Ignoring my failed joke, Warren spoke up. "Grab me a Coke." It came off expectant, like, as a woman, I was expected to serve him. But whatever, if he'd asked nicely, I would have grabbed him on, and since I didn't want to rock the boat, I didn't berate him like he deserved.

"Fine," I said behind my rolling eyes as I stepped into the side cold room where the drinks were kept.

The cold room, they called it, was well-named. A side room off the basement, kept way cooler than the rest of the house, filled with drinks, root veg, and canned goods. It wasn't as cold as a fridge, but it was cold. I quickly bent over to grab a bottle of water from the case and, yes, a Coke for Warren. The Coke was stuck, and I had to loosen the plastic to set it free, which distracted me from Roy entering behind me. As I wrestled the Coke free, I heard a sound and quickly glanced over my shoulder to see him avert his ass from my plump ass, embarrassed for being caught red-handed.

Standing up, I gave him a small smile; the dude was an anime nerd who never dated. My half-Filipino ass in these shorts was something I couldn't blame him for looking at, plus he was kind of cute when he was flustered. So, I let it slide, "Hey, Roy, can I grab you anything?"

"Um, Courtney," he stammered. "Yeah, a Diet Coke?" His face was bright red. The dude loved his Diet Coke, and conveniently, it was under the Coke, so I had a good time exaggerating my grab of it, wiggling enough to properly make him cream his pants.

As I handed him the drink, he asked, "Um, how are things?"

"Yeah, Roy, it's just weird being here, you know, especially with Stewart. What's up with that guy?"

Roy blinked, surprised by my question. "Come on, Courtney." His look said: You know exactly why. The problem was, I didn't.

"What?"

"Seriously, Courtney? You know Stewart always had a giant crush on you."

I was at a loss for words. Suddenly, so many things made sense. Why I was added to his study group. Why we battled, with extra study sessions, to become valedictorian. This is why he was so hurt that I chose SDU over Iowa. This is why he was so hurt that we drifted apart. He wasn't upset; I moved past him and his friends; he was hurt because I rejected him, in a way. Even if I wasn't aware of it. Boys are like that, building up a huge relationship with someone who doesn't even realize it.

"Literally, I had no idea, Roy. I, like, knew you boys checked me out when I thought I wasn't looking, but not..." my voice trailed off when I noticed Roy's eyes were not looking at my face, but lower. Following his glance, I noticed that the cold room had had its effects. My nipples were on full display under my thin tank top. I let it slide and just continued on like I didn't notice.

"Thanks for letting me know, Roy." With that, I brushed past him and headed back to the others.

I should have taken some time to warm up before I brought Warren his Coke, but even though I was a genius, I was dumb sometimes.

His lingering look at my tits was frustrating, but something else too. Usually, my B-cups did not garner much attention. When we last hung out, the bulky sweaters I used to wear would have prevented this. Isn't this what I wanted, though, when I got dressed?

"Thanks, Nips," Warren said as he took the can. He stared at me, waiting for a reaction that was not coming; I would not give him the satisfaction.

"Thanks."

I glanced over at Stewart, scrolling his phone, not noticing me at all, or at least pretending not to. I wasn't sure if I should talk to him and try to ease this whole situation or if I should just roll with the tide. I guess I needed to decide what I was going to do this summer today because this current situation was not going to cut it.

-FOUR-

This afternoon was not going well, but I had an idea. Let's lean into nostalgia and do something that we all enjoy, just like old times.

After everyone had gathered into their seats again, I started as casually as possible. "Hey, what if we started a new D&D campaign?"

The response was not as positive as I anticipated.

"Um, sorry, Courtney, but we just, you know, finished a giant campaign," Roy said.

"Yeah, we need a break; it was so epic. We kind of need a break from it," Stewart added, which was a positive development that he spoke to me.

Okay, so no D&D. Fine. I wanted to avoid video games, so what did that leave? Talking?

"So, how's school going?"

It took a bit, but we caught each other up. Stewart found the biology program as hard as I found it, which was a relief. Warren raved about the girls there, and Roy talked about the fast internet. It turns out that Roy and Warren were roommates, and Stewart was nearby, rooming with a physics student named Jason, who mostly kept to himself. I shared a bit about Bree, which they all enjoyed, maybe a little too much.

Since Warren brought up women, I prodded.

"Any girlfriends?"

Silence. Well, that was telling.

Roy mumbled, "Nope," barely audible, while Stewart shrugged. Warren didn't answer, not wanting to ruin his illusion.

Finally, Stewart asked hesitantly, "What about you, Courtney?"

"Yeah, well, a couple of guys..."

"Did you put out," Warren said bluntly.

"Seriously, Warren?"

"We are all curious," he replied. I looked around and saw that Roy and Stewart were clearly interested. Oh well, it's not like it's a big deal anyway.

"Well, yeah, I'm not a virgin. Are you guys still?"

That sounded way too much like a put-down, and Roy looked down, embarrassed. I felt bad. I went from feeling bad to worse when I saw the hurt in Stewart's eyes, as if all his dreams had been dashed.

"We haven't even seen a woman naked, IRL, I mean," Roy finally said with desperation.

"Not even strippers?" I asked, half-joking.

"Nope," Warren said with all his confidence shattered. "And we're sophomores; we are kind of fucked forever. What woman wants to be with a desperate virgin?"

So dramatic. They were all staring at me now.

"Really?"

They all nodded with embarrassment.

I signed. This day has been wild. I can't believe my attempt to break the ice and turn this into a fun time had failed miserably. I just wanted some fun to get out of the monotony of being stuck in this town for the summer, and here I was surrounded by three boys sounding so... pathetic.